Roger Murtaugh [just after Murtaugh prevents Riggs from shooting himself]
You're not trying to draw a psycho pension! You really are crazy!
Played by Danny Glover 
Lethal Weapon (1987) · 33 quotes
Lethal Weapon (1987) · 33 quotes
2nd most-quoted character in Lethal Weapon (1987): in 19 of its 33 quotes
Most scenes with: Martin Riggs (11), Mr. Joshua (11)
General McAlister, time for you to die.
More lines from Roger Murtaugh
6 quotes Roger Murtaugh Roger Murtaugh [repeated line in all four movies]
I'm too old for this shit.
Roger Murtaugh I was driving before you were an itch in your daddy's pants!
Roger Murtaugh [aiming his gun at McAlister's oncoming car]
No way you live. No way.
Roger Murtaugh [when Joshua is panting on the lawn after the title-fight]
Get that shit off my lawn!
Roger Murtaugh [last lines]
I'm too old for this...
Scenes with Roger Murtaugh
12 scenes
Hey, look friend, let's just cut the shit. Now we both know why I was transferred. Everybody thinks I'm suicidal, in which case, I'm **** and nobody wants to work with me; or they think I'm faking to draw a psycho pension, in which case, I'm **** and nobody wants to work with me. Basically, I'm ****.
Roger Murtaugh Guess what?
What?
Roger Murtaugh I don't want to work with you!
Hey, don't.
Roger Murtaugh Ain't got no choice! Looks like we both been ****!
Terrific.
Roger Murtaugh God hates me. That's what it is.
Hate him back; it works for me.
What did he mean back there when he said you owed him?
Roger Murtaugh We served together in '65. la Drang Valley. Saved my life. Took a bayonet in the lungs.
That was nice of him.
You want me to drive?
Roger Murtaugh No, you're supposed to be suicidal, remember? I'LL drive.
Anybody who drives around in this town IS suicidal.
Roger Murtaugh Okay, clown, no bullshit! You wanna kill yourself?
Oh, for Chriss-...
Roger Murtaugh Shut up! Yes or no - you wanna die?!
Oh, I got the job done! What the hell do you want?!
Roger Murtaugh JUST ANSWER THE QUESTION!
Well, what do you wanna hear, man?! Do you wanna hear that sometimes I think about eatin' a bullet?! HUH!? Well, I do! I even got a special bullet for the occasion with a hollow point, look! Make sure it blows the back of my goddamned head out and do the job right! Every single day I wake up and I think of a reason not to do it! Every single day! You know why I don't do it?! This is gonna make you laugh! You know why I don't do it?! The job! Doin' the job! Now that's the reason!
Roger Murtaugh Have you ever met anybody you didn't kill?
Well, I haven't killed you yet.
Roger Murtaugh Listen, sorry about all that shit I was in your face about earlier... you saved my life. Thank you.
Oh, I bet that hurt to say.
Roger Murtaugh [chuckles]
You'll never know.
The guy who shot me! The same Albino jackrabbit son of a bitch who did Hunsacker!
Roger Murtaugh You sure?
Yeah, I'm sure man. I never forget an asshole.
You know they're gonna kill her, don't you?
Roger Murtaugh Yeah.
So, if you want her back, you're gonna have to take her away from them.
Roger Murtaugh I know.
You do this my way. You shoot, you shoot to kill, get as many of them as you can. All you gotta do is just not miss.
Roger Murtaugh I won't miss.
We're gonna get bloody on this one, Rog.
Roger Murtaugh Are you really crazy... or are you as good as you say you are?
You're gonna have to trust me.
Culprit
[punches Murtaugh in the mouth]
The shipment, Mr. Murtaugh.
Roger Murtaugh Go spit!
Roger Murtaugh Hey, Riggs!
Yo.
Roger Murtaugh If you think I'm gonna eat the world's lousiest Christmas turkey by myself, you're crazy.
Well, I got news for you, Rog... I'm not crazy.
Roger Murtaugh I know.
Well, good. Let's eat.
Hey, you know what?
Roger Murtaugh What?
Well, I think your daughter kinda likes me.
Roger Murtaugh If you touch her, I'll kill you.
Ha! You'll try.
McCleary
**** you, I'm jumping!
[Grabs him]
Do you really wanna jump? Do you wanna? Well then that's fine with me! Come on, let's do it asshole, let's do it. I wanna do it, I wanna do it!
McCleary
Wait a minute! What do you mean? What do you mean?
Roger Murtaugh [Both jump off the building and onto the trampoline below.]
Oh, shit...
McCleary
*Screaming for help*
