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Bam Margera: This is Barrel Surfing.
Steve-O: I think Barrel Surfing's for macho jerks with a death wish.
Chris Pontius: No, it's not. It's the ultimate thrill, the ultimate rush. Even more than sex.
Steve-O: Well, that depends on who you're doing it with.
Steve-O: I think Barrel Surfing's for macho jerks with a death wish.
Chris Pontius: No, it's not. It's the ultimate thrill, the ultimate rush. Even more than sex.
Steve-O: Well, that depends on who you're doing it with.
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Bam Margera: Where's Phil?
Phil Margera: [From the bathroom] I had to take a mean shit.
Bam Margera: There's a gorilla.
Phil Margera: I know, I had to take a mean shit, it was coming out. Hear it? It's all juicy. I had to do it.
Bam Margera: Phil, you are mingin'.
Phil Margera: I know, I had to.
Phil Margera: [From the bathroom] I had to take a mean shit.
Bam Margera: There's a gorilla.
Phil Margera: I know, I had to take a mean shit, it was coming out. Hear it? It's all juicy. I had to do it.
Bam Margera: Phil, you are mingin'.
Phil Margera: I know, I had to.
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Jason "Wee Man" Acuña: How's Santa doing?
Johnny Knoxville: [climbing a tree] Santa's **** tired.
Johnny Knoxville: [climbing a tree] Santa's **** tired.
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Jeff Tremaine: Jared, what's your job?
Jared Allen: MURDER KNOXVILLE'S FACE.
Jeff Tremaine: And Johnny, what's your job?
Johnny Knoxville: ...Catch the ball?
Jared Allen: MURDER KNOXVILLE'S FACE.
Jeff Tremaine: And Johnny, what's your job?
Johnny Knoxville: ...Catch the ball?
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Johnny Knoxville: [after pulling a string off Chris' penis with a helicopter] So much for my aviation career.
Chris Pontius: So much for my love life.
Chris Pontius: So much for my love life.
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Johnny Knoxville: [Preparing the Poo-Cocktail Supreme] I think it was 10 years ago today I did the first Poo Cocktail. Now you're taking the reins and taking it to a whole 'nother level.
Steve-O: [Unexcitedly] Yep.
Johnny Knoxville: You look pretty happy about it.
Steve-O: You guys better let me out after this quick, because I'm going to be so claustrophobic, dude.
Johnny Knoxville: What, you have claustrophobia?
Chris Pontius: Just relax, and enjoy your shit.
Steve-O: [Unexcitedly] Yep.
Johnny Knoxville: You look pretty happy about it.
Steve-O: You guys better let me out after this quick, because I'm going to be so claustrophobic, dude.
Johnny Knoxville: What, you have claustrophobia?
Chris Pontius: Just relax, and enjoy your shit.
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Rake Yohn: [As Ryan Dunn is about to super glue his ass to Phil Margera's back] Dunn, do you shave your ass?
Ryan Dunn: "Do I shave my ass?", look at me! I don't know what a razor feels like.
Johnny Knoxville: Well apparently, you don't know what toilet paper feels like either.
Dunn: I don't!
Ryan Dunn: "Do I shave my ass?", look at me! I don't know what a razor feels like.
Johnny Knoxville: Well apparently, you don't know what toilet paper feels like either.
Dunn: I don't!
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[After Dunn gets blasted with a paint bomb in a porta-potty]
Jason "Wee Man" Acuña: No **** way, dude!
Ryan Dunn: Hey, is there blue on me?
Johnny Knoxville: Oh my god...I am so happy.
Ryan Dunn: Dude, that thing goes!
Jason "Wee Man" Acuña: No **** way, dude!
Ryan Dunn: Hey, is there blue on me?
Johnny Knoxville: Oh my god...I am so happy.
Ryan Dunn: Dude, that thing goes!
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Get in the Lambo, shitbird!
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Hello, I'm Johnny Knoxville. Welcome to Jackass!
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Hi, I'm Preston Lacy. And this is the Apple of my Ass.
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See, Dave doesn't understand: the more you freak out, the more you get stung. Idiot.
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That had everything. It had shit, it had danger, it had puke. That's what this show's all about...and sex appeal.
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This is the kind of extreme shit most extreme dudes don't even think about.