The House with a Clock in Its Walls 2018 quotes

I'm going to perform the greatest magic trick of all time! I'm going to make people [Makes hand motions] disappear... [performs process] Spin the world back to the beginning.

Jonathan Barnavelt

Have a look around, it's perfectly safe... [a tentacled monster opens a door, Jonathan shoves it back]

Lewis Barnavelt

That's safe?

Jonathan Barnavelt

As long as it's fed.

Jonathan Barnavelt

Three gongs... Last time, it was four. What happens when it gets down to one?

Mrs. Zimmerman

Nothing good, that's for certain.

Jonathan Barnavelt

That wasn't a warlock. It wasn't even human. That was a demon, you reckless idiot!

Yes, Azazel, the fourth prince of Hell.

Lewis Barnavelt

But, Uncle Jonathan, don't I have to have dinner before I'm allowed to have cookies?

Jonathan Barnavelt

Well, why not just eat cookies for dinner? They're far more delicious.

Lewis Barnavelt

I know. It's just, we had these house rules.

Jonathan Barnavelt

Well, not in this house. There's no bedtime, bath-time or meal-time. You can eat cookies till you throw up for all I care. You'll see. Things are quite different here.

Lewis Barnavelt

So, how long have you lived next door to Uncle Jonathan?

Florence Zimmerman

Oh, we've been friends forever, ever since I came here. Ran here, actually. From Paris. After the War. [Notices Lewis giving her a sly grin] And no, to answer that look you're giving me, your uncle and I aren't anything kissy-faced.

Jonathan Barnavelt

Gross!

Lewis Barnavelt

This all feels weird.

Florence Zimmerman

What's wrong with weird? Weird's like the nuts in my cookies. It's the nuts that make things interesting.

Lewis Barnavelt

Uncle Jonathan... This is my fault.

Jonathan Barnavelt

Lewis, you helped us, you're the one who decoded the blueprints.

Lewis Barnavelt

No. I mean, I'm the one who brought Isaac back.

Mrs. Zimmerman

Lewis?

Jonathan Barnavelt

What are you talking about?

Lewis Barnavelt

I opened the cabinet. I used your book. I-I'm so, so, so sorry.

Jonathan Barnavelt

No, you couldn't have. You don't know enough magic to pull off a spell like that.

Lewis Barnavelt

I just followed the directions. I bled onto the book.

Mrs. Zimmerman

Oh, Lewis. Blood magic?

Jonathan Barnavelt

That was my one rule.

Lewis Barnavelt

I-I know. I'm sorry.

Jonathan Barnavelt

And you broke it?

Lewis Barnavelt

I didn't mean to.

Jonathan Barnavelt

So you opened a forbidden cabinet and performed an unholy ritual on accident?

Lewis Barnavelt

I didn't know Isaac was evil. You never told me.

Jonathan Barnavelt

Oh, so this is my fault?

Lewis Barnavelt

I didn't say that.

Jonathan Barnavelt

Then what are you saying? What the hell were you thinking?

Lewis Barnavelt

I just wanted Tarby to be my friend again. And I want my parents back. And I figured, if it worked here, I could go home and try it on them. I just want my mom.

I'm sorry. It was a mistake, you coming here.

You've been playing your saxophone again.

Jonathan Barnavelt

Madame, not everyone can appreciate the intricacies of a free-form jazz odyssey.

I don't care what you play. But you're playing at 3:00 in the morning, so I'm begging you.

Jonathan Barnavelt

I'll try to keep it down around 3:00 a.m. But, uh -- them's my best jammin' hours!

Mrs. Zimmerman

So, you told Lewis everything?

Jonathan Barnavelt

Well, not everything.

Mrs. Zimmerman

All he said was he was lost in the Black Forest. Now, that is a very old place with very old magic. It's where the brothers Grimm wrote their histories.

Lewis Barnavelt

You mean fairy tales? [Zimmerman gives him a sly look with a smile]

Jonathan Barnavelt

Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance you must keep moving.

Jonathan Barnavelt

There's a clock in the walls. We don't know what it does, except... something horrible.

Jonathan Barnavelt

We don't know where the clock is or what it does, except something horrible. No, we gotta do the responsible thing: lie to the kid.

Florence Zimmerman

God, I hate pumpkins.