Look, I'm not the monster you think I am. But, okay, I crossed a line. Just call the cops. I'll turn myself in.

[as if narrating a headline]

"Cute Pedophile Pleads Guilty. Aww, it's not his fault. He's sick. He has an addiction."

I'll do jail. Isn't, isn't that what should happen?

Yeah. You might. You might get jail time. I dunno: therapy, drugs, group discussions, notifying people when you move into a new house. How bad is that, really?

It'll ruin my career, ruin my life.

Well, didn't Roman Polanski just win an Oscar?