Ms. Heller I'm Ms. Heller the lunch lady...oh, damn! I mean your new teacher! ...Yeah!
Lloyd Christmas
Eric Christian Olsen · 11 quotes
Harry Dunne
Derek Richardson · 10 quotes
Jessica
Rachel Nichols · 5 quotes
Walter
3 quotes
Most scenes together: Lloyd Christmas & Harry Dunne (4), Harry Dunne & Jessica (4), Lloyd Christmas & Jessica (3)
Dumb and Dumberer: When Harry Met Lloyd quotes
Page 1 of 2 Ms. Heller
Women In Museum
The daddy polar bear was shot by hunter...just like your father!
You two timing slut! And you, I thought you were from St. Louis! I don't ever want to see you again!
And I'm leaving! (he does so)
(thinks the chocolate is fecal matter)
He shit everywhere. THERE'S SHIT EVERYWHERE! DAMN IT!!! THERE'S SHIT ON THE WINDOWS! OH MY GOD! MY HOUSE IS FULL OF SHIT!! HE SHIT EVERYWHERE!! LOOK WHAT HE DID! HE SHIT ALL OVER THE WALL! GET UP HERE!
Uh, how about tonight at eight?
MY HOUSE IS FULL OF BILE! SHIT!! (to his wife) Calm down! Just calm down!
Th-Thank you Lloyd, I got to go. I got to go for a little peek, see you at eight!
Date with Jessica, YEAH!
Look what he did! He shit all over the wall!
Wipe your feet. My parents are totally anal!
Oh, that's gross!
(He uses Harry as a shield against mud being splattered from a car tire)
I got some dirt on my shirt. How gross is this? Harry?
(Harry gets struck by car)
WHOA! Harry? You got to look both ways buddy!
Oh my god...it's you! Your that guy that crapped up my house. What are you- your covered in shit! My car is covered in shit! What are you doing? Oh my god! What is wrong with you? You come back here, I'm not cleaning this up! I'm going to have to have this towed. Come back here! Are you out of your mind? What is it with you and fecal matter, look at this!
Jessica, you give him some yet?
Some what?
You know, SOME.
You like your butter, huh? We have some margarine if you want, you can just scoop it out of the tub.
No I'm fine, thank you.
Oh, hello.
This is uh...Harry.
You know, they make that in a womens suit to! (Harry covers himself a little with the jacket)
Jessica were eating!
Meet me at the front door Lloyd.
Well I see you like my rolls.
Sure, I like a women with some meat on her bones. So Charlie, what business you in?
The name's Walter.
Harry, what're you doing? She's a foreign exchange student. She obviously doesn't speak the English. [to Ching Chong] Ching-chong-ching-chingy-chong-ching-chong-ching!
You have beautiful eyes!
Thank you.
Hey where'd you come from?
I was born in St. Louis.
Would you like me to pat your head?
Would you like me to pat your head?
I bet you want your head scratched.
I bet you want your head scratched.
No why, we still have a lot to talk about.
I bet you... [dog barks at him] Don't you snap at me like that! You're lucky I don't punch you right in the face!
Don't snap at me like that! You're lucky I don't punch you in the face!
Oh, I remember you...how could I forget those big hairy nipples.
How could I forget those big hair nipples?
I can almost smell your stinky fenuter from here.
I can almost smell your stinky fenuter from here.
[thinking]
Wow! She's actually making me feel hot. [is shown to be sitting on a heater] I didn't think the first time would hurt so much... [Out loud] ESPECIALLY IN THE ASS!
Good one Captain Rob, he does look like a you-know-what!
I changed for dinner, I always change when I eat, except for breakfast and spazz meal.
Man you got some serious self issues to work out my pudgy-ugly little friend.
Next time Turks handing out wedgies...your not going to get one! Na uh! Were done pal, finito, the end...Auf wiener schnitzel...Mozeltov!