Bob Diamond quotes from Defending Your Life (1991)

Daniel Miller

Is this Heaven?

Bob Diamond

No it isn't Heaven?

Daniel Miller

Is it Hell?

Bob Diamond

Nope, it isn't Hell either. Actually, there is no Hell. Although I hear Los Angeles is getting pretty close.

Bob Diamond

For example, I use forty-eight percent of my brain. Do you know how much you use?

Daniel Miller

Forty... seven?

Bob Diamond

Three.

Bob Diamond

Your honors, Miss Foster and I have had this argument for a long time. I think the act itself is what's important, but she wants to keep enlarging it until everything loses its meaning. If I fix the flat tire on your car, and two years later I lose your garden hose, according to you I'm not going to get any credit for the flat, I'm just a dumb guy who lost the hose!

Bob Diamond

Did we ever stop to think that this young boy had a bond with his father? I don't think it had anything to do with the friend. I just think Daniel couldn't lie to his dad. That's all.

You're nodding, Mr. Miller. Does that mean you agree with Mr. Diamond?

Daniel Miller

Oh, yes. I had a bond with my father. I pretty much never lied to him.

You never lied to your father? Would you like me to show you at least 500 examples?

Daniel Miller

I said "pretty much" never lied. I didn't say I never, ever lied. You have to lie sometimes... in an emergency. But, ah, it doesn't mean the bond is affected. If you've got the bond, the bond is always there, and if you have to lie occasionally you're not going to interfere with the bond. You know, the bond can wait for a little lie and... in the end it's there for you. You know, sometimes in the middle of a lie I found that the bond would kick in... maybe squeeze a little truth out.

Bob Diamond

Psst, wrap it up.

Daniel Miller

I'm through.