Ed Furillo TRUSTED us? They don't even KNOW us! They followed us because we yelled "yah!".
Played by Bruno Kirby 
City Slickers (1991) · 46 quotes
City Slickers (1991) · 46 quotes
2nd most-quoted character in City Slickers (1991): in 17 of its 46 quotes
Most scenes with: Mitch Robbins (10), Phil Berquist (7)
No, that was "I like your ass; can I wear it as a hat?".
More lines from Ed Furillo
5 quotes Ed Furillo Ed Furillo What'd ya use for protection, Phil; paper or plastic?
Ed Furillo Charge all this to my Visa [spits out chewing tobacco and it lands on a denim shirt for sale] and that as well.
Ed Furillo [while Phil is taking pictures of Mitch getting his butt wound stitched]
Phil, let the man keep what's left of his dignity.
Ed Furillo Charge all this to my Visa [spits out chewing tobacco and it lands on a denim shirt for sale] I'll take that shirt, too.
Scenes with Ed Furillo
11 scenes
I wish you hadn't worn this jacket.
Ed What's wrong with it?
Well, look at it; it's got your name and your picture on it. It's a little grotesque.
Ed I'm proud of what I do.
So is the President; he doesn't wear his picture on his suit.
Ben Jessup Hi.
Ed I'm Ed Furillo; I sell sporting goods.
Show him your jacket.
I'm Phil Berquist. I committed adultery; lost my job and my family.
His jacket's being made.
Ed This guy, Curly, is a true cowboy. One of the last real men. He's untamed. A mustang. We're trained ponies. It'll do us good to be in his world for a while.
[Curly is approaching them from behind Mitch]
Do us good? Didn't you guys see? He was hanging the help! Did you see his eyes? He's got crazy eyes. He's a lunatic! I am telling you, we are going into the wilderness being led by a lunatic!
[Mitch notices everyone's terrified faces as Curly is standing directly behind him]
He's behind me, isn't he?
Everyone, in unison
Goodnight!
I crap bigger than you.
So, what was your best day, Phil?
Believe it or not, my wedding day.
Ed You're kidding!
No, seriously! Arlene looked great; those water pills really helped. I looked out and saw my old man sitting there, and he winked at me. It was like, I've made it. I'm not a goofball anymore.
What was your worst day?
Every day since is a tie.
Alright Ed, your best day, what was it? Twins in a trapeze, what?
Ed No, I don't wanna play.
C'mon, we did it.
Ed I don't feel like it.
Uh, okay.
Ed [Ed pauses, then begins to speak]
I'm fourteen and my mother and father are fighting again. Y'know, because she caught him again. Caught him; this time the girl drove by the house to pick him up. And I finally realized, he wasn't just cheating on my mother, he was cheating us. So I told him; I said, "You're bad to us. We don't love you. I'll take care of my mother and my sister. We don't need you any more." And he made like he was gonna hit me, but I didn't budge. And he turned around and he left. He never bothered us again. Well, I took care of my mother and my sister from that day on. That's my best day.
What was your worst day?
Ed [brief pause]
Same day.
Ed [Mitch and Ed are watching Bonnie ride by on a horse; Ed is leering at her buttocks]
Man, that saddle sure is having a lot of fun.
You have like a half track mind, don't you?
Ed Oh, come on. Are you telling me you wouldn't like to screw her brains out?
You know, that's such a lovely image - "screw her brains out." It ranks right up there with that other classic: "bang the crap out of her."
Ed [Mitch, Ed, Phil and Bonnie are sitting on bedrolls discussing which is more interesting, women discussing relationships or men discussing baseball]
That's easy; we win.
Bonnie [laughs incredulously]
How can you say that?
Ed Because honey, if that stuff were half as interesting as baseball, they'd have cards for it and sell it with gum.
It's nothing to be ashamed of - I had the same problem.
Didn't you feel stupid; I mean, didn't you feel... inadequate?
Yeah, for a while, but then I overcame it. Can I explain it to you again? I mean now promise me you won't get upset.
O.K.; it's not gonna to do any good.
O.K., if you want to watch one show but record another show at the same time, the television set does not have to be on channel 3.
Yeah it does.
No it doesn't.
It does!
No, if you're watching what you're recording, then it has to be on 3.
What... the TV or... or the machine?
The TV.
You're saying I can record something I'm not even watching?
Yes, that's the point. You don't even need a TV to record.
How would I see it?
Well to see it you need a TV.
Ed Shut up! Just shut up! He doesn't get it! He'll never get it! It's been 4 hours! The cows can tape something by now! Forget about it, please!
Ed [starts chasing Phil]
You're dead! You are dead!
I'm gonna be okay, because I finally know what he was talking about.
Ed Who?
Curly. I know what he meant when he said there's just one thing that's really important.
Ed So what is it?
That's what you have to figure out.
Ed [laughing]
I'm gonna deck you, pal!
No, that's it; it's something different for everyone. For me, when I was in that river, I was only thinking about one thing. The rest of it just all went away.
THEY'RE GAINING ON US!
Ed Andele, ANDELE!
Alright what is the best day of your life?
You mean ever?
Yeah, best day ever in your whole life. And you can’t do when your kids were born, that’s too easy.
I got one; I’m seven years old and my dad takes me to Yankee Stadium. My first game. We go under this long, dark tunnel underneath the stands. I’m holding his hand and we come up out of the tunnel into the light. It was huge. How green the grass was, brown dirt. And that great green copper roof, remember? We had a black and white tv so this was the first came I ever saw in color. Sat there the whole game next to my dad. He taught me how to keep score, Mickey hit one out.
Good day.
And I still have the program.
Alright, what was the worst day you ever had?
Worst day. Couple years ago Barbara finds a lump.
What?
Ed Jesus.
Yeah, it scared the shit out of me.
You ever said anything.
Yeah, well, you know, it turned out to be nothing but that whole day was…
Ed Yeah but that was a good day.
How?
Ed Because it turned out to be nothing.
Yeah but the whole day until then was horrible.
Ed Yeah but it came out good. You’re a real “the glass is half empty” kind of a guy, you know that? I don’t know how Barbara can stand it.
Yeah.
Alright I got one: my best day.
Ed This isn’t the one about Arlene and that loose step, is it?
No, no, my wedding day.
What?
Yeah! Remember that day? Outdoor wedding, Arlene looked great. Those water pills really worked. You guys are all smiling at me and my dad in the front, gives me a little wink. You know? I mean he’s not the warmest of men but he winked. I was the first one of us to get married and have a real job and I remember thinking “I’m grown up. You know, I’m not a goofball anymore. I made it.” I felt like a man. It was the best day of my life.
Ed What was your worst day?
Every day since is a tie…
[They all laugh]
