[Noticing Dr. Evil's spaceship on radar]
Colonel, you better have a look at this radar.
What is it, son?
I don't know, sir, but it looks like a giant--
Dick.
Yeah?
Take a look out of starboard.
Oh my God, it looks like a huge--
Pecker.
[raising binoculars]
Ooh, Where?
Wait, that's not a woodpecker, it looks like someone's--
Privates! We have reports of an unidentified flying object. It has a long, smooth shaft, complete with--
Two balls.
[looking up from game]
What is that. It looks just like an enormous--
Wang, pay attention!
I was distracted by that giant flying--
Willie.
Yeah?
What's that?
[squints]
Well, that looks like a giant--
Johnson?!
Yes, sir?
Get on the horn to British Intelligence and let them know about this.
Later, as Dr. Evil is escaping:
Did we get Dr. Evil?
No, sir. He got away in that rocket that looks like a huge--
Penis. The male reproductive organ. Otherwise known as tallywhacker, schlong or--
Weiner? Any of you kids want another weiner?
Dad? What's that? points at rocket
I don't know, son, but it's got great big--
Nuts! Hot salty nuts! Who wants some-- Lord Almighty!
That looks just like my husband's--
One-eyed monster! Step right up and see the One-Eyed Monster!
jumps out and scares crowd, then points to the rocket Hey, what's that? It looks like a big--
Woody! Woody Harrelson? Can I have an autograph?
Sure thing. [Sees rocket] Oh my lord.
It's big!
Nah, I've seen bigger, it's--
