[Alvin is providing commentary on Brittany's shuffleboarding move, much to her annoyance]

Brittany approaches her puck... adjusts her stance... looks over at me quite annoyed... wonders to herself if I'm ever going to shut my mouth... realizes I'm not...and makes her move...

[Brittany misses]

And... OH! Oh, it's short! [laughs] A costly error, ladies and gentlemen! That's going to haunt her the rest of her career!

[laughs sarcastically]

You can make all the jokes you want, Alvin, but not even you can make this interesting.