Knocked Up

Knocked Up quotes

78 total quotes (ID: 324)

Allison Scott
Ben Stone
Fantasy Baseball Guy

(with a gas mask with an attached bong to his face) I am your stoner!

It's the baseball draft honey, I got Matsui!

You don't know who Doc Brown is? He invented the DeLorean.

Dude, it's not herpes if it's everywhere.

[on subject of husbands] You criticize them so much, they get down on themselves, and then they're forced to change!

How did it feel changing your name from Cat Stevens to Yusef Islam?

You went to Santa Monica Community College.

You can't buy shit! You can barely buy spaghetti!

I went where I went Jason!

[quoting ‘Back to the Future’] Where we're going we don't need roads.

She like'a da way ya dick taste.

Nice. You are such an asshole. You know what? Go--go **** your ****ing bong!

[sobbing and thinking about the babysitter] She is such a prissy little high school cu... ****!

I'm gonna thrown you in my DeLorean and gun it to 88.

I will **** my bong. Doggy-style, for once. (gives Alison the middle finger as he walks out of the OB/GYN office)