Knocked Up

Knocked Up quotes

78 total quotes (ID: 324)

Allison Scott
Ben Stone
Fantasy Baseball Guy

Ben: Our baby is going to be French Canadian.
Alison: And a little bit Spanish...?
Ben: Yeah, I'm not very good with impressions.

Dude, it's not herpes if it's everywhere.

It's the baseball draft honey, I got Matsui!

You don't know who Doc Brown is? He invented the DeLorean.

[on subject of husbands] You criticize them so much, they get down on themselves, and then they're forced to change!

You can't buy shit! You can barely buy spaghetti!

How did it feel changing your name from Cat Stevens to Yusef Islam?

I went where I went Jason!

You went to Santa Monica Community College.

Nice. You are such an asshole. You know what? Go--go **** your ****ing bong!

[sobbing and thinking about the babysitter] She is such a prissy little high school cu... ****!

[quoting ‘Back to the Future’] Where we're going we don't need roads.

She like'a da way ya dick taste.

I will **** my bong. Doggy-style, for once. (gives Alison the middle finger as he walks out of the OB/GYN office)

You look like a cholo dressed up on Easter.