Fargo quotes
61 total quotesMultiple Characters
Opening Text
Wade Gustafson
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Jerry: I'm, uh, Jerry Lundegaard.
Carl: You're Jerry Lundegaard?
Jerry: Yah, Shep Proudfoot said--
Carl: Shep said you'd be here at 7:30. What gives, man?
Jerry: Shep said 8:30.
Carl: We been sitting here an hour. He's peed three times already.
Jerry: I'm terribly sorry. Shep told me 8:30. It was a mix-up, I guess.
Carl: You got the car?
Jerry: Yeah, you bet. It's in the lot there. Brand-new burnt umber Ciera.
Carl: Yeah, okay. Well, sit down then. I'm Carl Showalter and this is my associate Gaear Grimsrud.
Jerry: Yeah, how ya doin'? So, we all set on this thing, then?
Carl: Sure, Jerry, we're all set. Why wouldn't we be?
Jerry: Yeah, no, I'm sure you are. Shep vouched for you and all. I got every confidence in you fellas. So I guess that's it, then. Here are the keys--
Carl: No, that's not it, Jerry.
Jerry: Huh?
Carl: The new vehicle, plus forty thousand dollars.
Jerry: Yeah, but the deal was, the car first, see, then the forty thousand, like as if it was the ransom. I thought Shep told ya--
Carl: Shep didn't tell us much, Jerry.
Jerry: Well, okay--
Carl: Except that you were gonna be here at 7:30.
Jerry: Yeah, well, that was a mix-up, then.
Carl: Yeah, you already said that.
Jerry: Yeah. But it's not a whole pay-in-advance deal. I give you a brand-new vehicle in advance and--
Carl: I'm not gonna debate you, Jerry.
Jerry: Okay.
Carl: I'm not gonna sit here and debate. I will say this though: what Shep told us didn't make a whole lot of sense.
Jerry: Oh, no, it's real sound. It's all worked out.
Carl: You want your own wife kidnapped?
Jerry: Yeah.
Carl: You--my point is, you pay the ransom what eighty thousand bucks? I mean, you give us half the ransom, forty thousand, you keep half. It's like robbing Peter to play Paul, it doesn't make any sense.
Jerry: Okay, see, it's not me payin' the ransom. The thing is, my wife, she's wealthy. Her dad, he's real well off. Now, I'm in a bit of trouble--
Carl: What kind of trouble are you in, Jerry?
Jerry: Well, that's, that's, I'm not go into, into--see, I just need money. Now, her dad's real wealthy--
Carl: So why don't you just ask him for the money?
Grimsrud: Or your ****ing wife, you know.
Carl: Or your ****ing wife, Jerry.
Jerry: Well, it's all just part of this--They don't know I need it, see. Okay, so there's that. And even if they did, I wouldn't get it. So there's that on top, then. See, these're personal matters.
Carl: Personal matters?
Jerry: Yeah. Personal matters that needn't, uh--
Carl: Okay, Jerry. You're tasking us to perform this mission, but you, you won't, uh, you won't. Aw, **** it, let's take a look at that Ciera.
Carl: You're Jerry Lundegaard?
Jerry: Yah, Shep Proudfoot said--
Carl: Shep said you'd be here at 7:30. What gives, man?
Jerry: Shep said 8:30.
Carl: We been sitting here an hour. He's peed three times already.
Jerry: I'm terribly sorry. Shep told me 8:30. It was a mix-up, I guess.
Carl: You got the car?
Jerry: Yeah, you bet. It's in the lot there. Brand-new burnt umber Ciera.
Carl: Yeah, okay. Well, sit down then. I'm Carl Showalter and this is my associate Gaear Grimsrud.
Jerry: Yeah, how ya doin'? So, we all set on this thing, then?
Carl: Sure, Jerry, we're all set. Why wouldn't we be?
Jerry: Yeah, no, I'm sure you are. Shep vouched for you and all. I got every confidence in you fellas. So I guess that's it, then. Here are the keys--
Carl: No, that's not it, Jerry.
Jerry: Huh?
Carl: The new vehicle, plus forty thousand dollars.
Jerry: Yeah, but the deal was, the car first, see, then the forty thousand, like as if it was the ransom. I thought Shep told ya--
Carl: Shep didn't tell us much, Jerry.
Jerry: Well, okay--
Carl: Except that you were gonna be here at 7:30.
Jerry: Yeah, well, that was a mix-up, then.
Carl: Yeah, you already said that.
Jerry: Yeah. But it's not a whole pay-in-advance deal. I give you a brand-new vehicle in advance and--
Carl: I'm not gonna debate you, Jerry.
Jerry: Okay.
Carl: I'm not gonna sit here and debate. I will say this though: what Shep told us didn't make a whole lot of sense.
Jerry: Oh, no, it's real sound. It's all worked out.
Carl: You want your own wife kidnapped?
Jerry: Yeah.
Carl: You--my point is, you pay the ransom what eighty thousand bucks? I mean, you give us half the ransom, forty thousand, you keep half. It's like robbing Peter to play Paul, it doesn't make any sense.
Jerry: Okay, see, it's not me payin' the ransom. The thing is, my wife, she's wealthy. Her dad, he's real well off. Now, I'm in a bit of trouble--
Carl: What kind of trouble are you in, Jerry?
Jerry: Well, that's, that's, I'm not go into, into--see, I just need money. Now, her dad's real wealthy--
Carl: So why don't you just ask him for the money?
Grimsrud: Or your ****ing wife, you know.
Carl: Or your ****ing wife, Jerry.
Jerry: Well, it's all just part of this--They don't know I need it, see. Okay, so there's that. And even if they did, I wouldn't get it. So there's that on top, then. See, these're personal matters.
Carl: Personal matters?
Jerry: Yeah. Personal matters that needn't, uh--
Carl: Okay, Jerry. You're tasking us to perform this mission, but you, you won't, uh, you won't. Aw, **** it, let's take a look at that Ciera.
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Attendant: Hi.
Carl: Yeah, I decided not to park here.
Attendant: What do you mean? You decided not to park here?
Carl: Yeah, I just came in. I decided not to park here.
Attendant: You, uh--I'm sorry, sir, but--
Carl: I decided not to--I'm, uh, not taking the trip as it turns out.
Attendant: I'm sorry, sir, we do have to charge you the four dollars.
Carl: I just pulled in here. I just ****in' pulled in here!
Attendant: Well, see, there's a minimum charge of four dollars. Long-term parking charges by the day.
Carl: I guess you think, ya know, you're some kind of an authority figure. With that stupid ****ing uniform. Huh, buddy? King Clip-on Tie here. Big ****ing man, huh? You know, these are the limits of your life, man. Ruler of your little ****ing gate here. There's your four dollars, you pathetic piece of shit.
Carl: Yeah, I decided not to park here.
Attendant: What do you mean? You decided not to park here?
Carl: Yeah, I just came in. I decided not to park here.
Attendant: You, uh--I'm sorry, sir, but--
Carl: I decided not to--I'm, uh, not taking the trip as it turns out.
Attendant: I'm sorry, sir, we do have to charge you the four dollars.
Carl: I just pulled in here. I just ****in' pulled in here!
Attendant: Well, see, there's a minimum charge of four dollars. Long-term parking charges by the day.
Carl: I guess you think, ya know, you're some kind of an authority figure. With that stupid ****ing uniform. Huh, buddy? King Clip-on Tie here. Big ****ing man, huh? You know, these are the limits of your life, man. Ruler of your little ****ing gate here. There's your four dollars, you pathetic piece of shit.
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THIS IS A TRUE STORY.
The events depicted in this film
took place in Minnesota in 1987.
At the request of the survivors,
the names have been changed.
Out of respect for the dead,
the rest has been told exactly
as it occurred.
The events depicted in this film
took place in Minnesota in 1987.
At the request of the survivors,
the names have been changed.
Out of respect for the dead,
the rest has been told exactly
as it occurred.
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Marge: Okay, so we got a trooper pulls someone over, we got a shooting. These folks drive by, there's a high-speed pursuit, ends here, and then this execution-type deal. I'd be very surprised if our suspect was from Brainerd.
Lou: Yeah.
Marge: And I'll tell you what, from his footprint he looks like a big fella.
[Marge bends over]
Lou: See somethin' down there, Chief?
Marge: Oh, I just think I'm gonna barf.
Lou: Geez. You okay there, Margie?
Marge: Yah, I'm fine. [She stands up straight] It's just morning sickness. Well, that passed.
Lou: Oh yeah?
Marge: Yeah, now I'm hungry again.
Lou: Yeah.
Marge: And I'll tell you what, from his footprint he looks like a big fella.
[Marge bends over]
Lou: See somethin' down there, Chief?
Marge: Oh, I just think I'm gonna barf.
Lou: Geez. You okay there, Margie?
Marge: Yah, I'm fine. [She stands up straight] It's just morning sickness. Well, that passed.
Lou: Oh yeah?
Marge: Yeah, now I'm hungry again.
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Reilly Deifenbach: Mr. Lundegaard, this is Reilly Deifenbach calling from GMAC. How are you this morning?
Jerry: Yeah, real good. How you doin'?
Reilly Deifenbach: Pretty good, Mr. Lundegaard. You're damned hard to get on the phone.
Jerry: Yeah, it's pretty darned busy here, but that's the way we like it.
Reilly Deifenbach: That's for sure. Now, I just need, on these last, these financing do****ents you sent us, I can't read the serial numbers of the vehicles on here, so I--
Jerry: But I already got the, it's okay, the loans are in place, I already got the, the what, the--
Reilly Deifenbach: Yeah, the three hundred and twenty thousand, you got the money last month.
Jerry: Yeah, so we're all set.
Reilly Deifenbach: Yeah, but the vehicles you were borrowing on, I just can't read the serial numbers on your application. Maybe if you could just read them to me--
Jerry: But the deal's already done, I already got the money.
Reilly Deifenbach: Yeah, but we have an audit here, I just have to know that these vehicles you're financing with this money, that they really exist.
Jerry: Yeah, well, they exist all right.
Reilly Deifenbach: I'm sure they do, but I can't read their serial numbers here. So if you could read me--
Jerry: Well, but see, I don't have them in front of me. Why don't I just fax you over a copy--
Reilly Deifenbach: No. Fax is no good, that's what I have and I can't read the darn thing.
Jerry: Yeah, okay, I'll have my girl send you over a copy, then.
Reilly Deifenbach: Okay, because if I can't correlate this note with the specific vehicles, then I gotta call back that money.
Jerry: Yeah, how much money was that?
Reilly Deifenbach: Three hundred and twenty thousand. See, I gotta correlate that money with the cars it's being lent on.
Jerry: Yeah, no problem, I'll just fax that over to ya, then.
Reilly Deifenbach: No, no, fax is--
Jerry: I mean send it over. I'll shoot it right over to ya.
Reilly Deifenbach: Okay.
Jerry: Okay, real good, then.
Jerry: Yeah, real good. How you doin'?
Reilly Deifenbach: Pretty good, Mr. Lundegaard. You're damned hard to get on the phone.
Jerry: Yeah, it's pretty darned busy here, but that's the way we like it.
Reilly Deifenbach: That's for sure. Now, I just need, on these last, these financing do****ents you sent us, I can't read the serial numbers of the vehicles on here, so I--
Jerry: But I already got the, it's okay, the loans are in place, I already got the, the what, the--
Reilly Deifenbach: Yeah, the three hundred and twenty thousand, you got the money last month.
Jerry: Yeah, so we're all set.
Reilly Deifenbach: Yeah, but the vehicles you were borrowing on, I just can't read the serial numbers on your application. Maybe if you could just read them to me--
Jerry: But the deal's already done, I already got the money.
Reilly Deifenbach: Yeah, but we have an audit here, I just have to know that these vehicles you're financing with this money, that they really exist.
Jerry: Yeah, well, they exist all right.
Reilly Deifenbach: I'm sure they do, but I can't read their serial numbers here. So if you could read me--
Jerry: Well, but see, I don't have them in front of me. Why don't I just fax you over a copy--
Reilly Deifenbach: No. Fax is no good, that's what I have and I can't read the darn thing.
Jerry: Yeah, okay, I'll have my girl send you over a copy, then.
Reilly Deifenbach: Okay, because if I can't correlate this note with the specific vehicles, then I gotta call back that money.
Jerry: Yeah, how much money was that?
Reilly Deifenbach: Three hundred and twenty thousand. See, I gotta correlate that money with the cars it's being lent on.
Jerry: Yeah, no problem, I'll just fax that over to ya, then.
Reilly Deifenbach: No, no, fax is--
Jerry: I mean send it over. I'll shoot it right over to ya.
Reilly Deifenbach: Okay.
Jerry: Okay, real good, then.
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Carl: Who the **** are you? Who the **** are you?!
Wade: I've got your damn money now where's my dauguter?
Carl: I am through ****in' around. Drop that ****in' briefcase!
Wade: Where's my daughter?
Carl: **** you man! Where's Jerry? I gave simple ****in' instructions.
Wade: Where's my damn daughter? No Jean, no money!
Carl: Drop that ****ing money!
Wade: No Jean, no money!
Carl: Is this a ****in' joke here?! [Carl pulls out his gun and shoots Wade] Happy now, asshole?! What's with you people?! Ya ****ing imbeciles!
[Wade shoots Carl in the cheek]
Carl: ****in' shot me!
Wade: I've got your damn money now where's my dauguter?
Carl: I am through ****in' around. Drop that ****in' briefcase!
Wade: Where's my daughter?
Carl: **** you man! Where's Jerry? I gave simple ****in' instructions.
Wade: Where's my damn daughter? No Jean, no money!
Carl: Drop that ****ing money!
Wade: No Jean, no money!
Carl: Is this a ****in' joke here?! [Carl pulls out his gun and shoots Wade] Happy now, asshole?! What's with you people?! Ya ****ing imbeciles!
[Wade shoots Carl in the cheek]
Carl: ****in' shot me!
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Jerry: Wade, have ya had a chance to think about, uh, that deal I was talkin' about, those forty acres there on Wayzata?
Wade: You told me about it.
Jerry: Yeah, you said you'd have a think about it. I understand it's a lot of money--
Wade: A heck of a lot. What'd you say you were gonna put there?
Jerry: A lot. It's a limited--
Wade: I know it's a lot.
Jerry: I mean a parking lot.
Wade: Yeah, well, seven hundred and fifty thousand dollars is a lot.
Jerry : Yeah, well, it's a chunk, but--
Wade: I used to own a lot myself way back in the late '50's. It's a lotta money.
Jerry: Yeah, well--
Wade: I thought you were gonna show it to Stan Grossman. He passes on this stuff before it gets kicked up to me.
Jerry: Well, you know Stan'll say no dice. That's why you pay him. I'm askin' you here, Wade. This could work out real good for me and Jean and Scotty.
Wade: Jean and Scotty'll never have to worry.
Wade: You told me about it.
Jerry: Yeah, you said you'd have a think about it. I understand it's a lot of money--
Wade: A heck of a lot. What'd you say you were gonna put there?
Jerry: A lot. It's a limited--
Wade: I know it's a lot.
Jerry: I mean a parking lot.
Wade: Yeah, well, seven hundred and fifty thousand dollars is a lot.
Jerry : Yeah, well, it's a chunk, but--
Wade: I used to own a lot myself way back in the late '50's. It's a lotta money.
Jerry: Yeah, well--
Wade: I thought you were gonna show it to Stan Grossman. He passes on this stuff before it gets kicked up to me.
Jerry: Well, you know Stan'll say no dice. That's why you pay him. I'm askin' you here, Wade. This could work out real good for me and Jean and Scotty.
Wade: Jean and Scotty'll never have to worry.
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Lou: [voice from cop scanner] His wife. This guy says she was kidnapped last Wednesday.
Marge: The day of our homicides.
Lou: Yah.
Marge: And this guy is who?
Lou: Lundegaard's father-in-law's accountant.
Marge: Gustafson's accountant.
Lou: Yah.
Marge: But we still haven't found Gustafson.
Lou: [crackle] Looking--
Marge: Sorry, didn't copy that Lou.
Lou: Still missing. We're looking.
Marge: Copy. And Lundegaard too.
Lou: Yah. Where are ya, Margie?
Marge: Oh, I'm almost back. I'm driving around Moose Lake.
Lou: Oh. Gary's loudmouth.
Marge: Yah, the loudmouth. So the whole state has it, huh. Lundegaard and Gustafson?
Lou: Yah, it's over the wire, it's everywhere, they'll find 'em.
Marge: Copy.
Lou: We've got a--
Marge: There's the car! There's the car!
Lou: Whose car?
Marge: My car! My car! Tan Ciera! Tan Ciera!
Marge: The day of our homicides.
Lou: Yah.
Marge: And this guy is who?
Lou: Lundegaard's father-in-law's accountant.
Marge: Gustafson's accountant.
Lou: Yah.
Marge: But we still haven't found Gustafson.
Lou: [crackle] Looking--
Marge: Sorry, didn't copy that Lou.
Lou: Still missing. We're looking.
Marge: Copy. And Lundegaard too.
Lou: Yah. Where are ya, Margie?
Marge: Oh, I'm almost back. I'm driving around Moose Lake.
Lou: Oh. Gary's loudmouth.
Marge: Yah, the loudmouth. So the whole state has it, huh. Lundegaard and Gustafson?
Lou: Yah, it's over the wire, it's everywhere, they'll find 'em.
Marge: Copy.
Lou: We've got a--
Marge: There's the car! There's the car!
Lou: Whose car?
Marge: My car! My car! Tan Ciera! Tan Ciera!
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Well...he never done this before. My boss said I can take $100 off of that Truecoat!
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Shep Proudfoot: [beating Carl violently] ****ing little weasel! **** you! You ****ing mother****er son of a bitch Jesus Christ you ****ing shitbag mother****er!
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Marge: So do you remember getting a call last Wednesday night?
Shep Proudfoot: Nope.
Marge: Well, you do reside their at 1425 Fremont Terrace?
Shep Proudfoot: Yep.
Marge: Anyone else residing there?
Shep Proudfoot: No.
Marge: Well, Mr. Proudfoot, this call came in past three in the morning. It's just hard for me to believe you can't remember anyone calling. Now, I know you've had some problems, struggling with the narcotics, some other entanglements, currently on parole...
Shep Proudfoot: So?
Marge: Well, associating with criminals, if you're the one they talked to, that right there would be a violation of your parole and would end with you back in Stillwater. Now, I saw some rough stuff on your priors, but nothing in the nature of a homicide. I know you don't want to be an accessory to something like that. So you think you might remember who those folks were who called ya?
Shep Proudfoot: Nope.
Marge: Well, you do reside their at 1425 Fremont Terrace?
Shep Proudfoot: Yep.
Marge: Anyone else residing there?
Shep Proudfoot: No.
Marge: Well, Mr. Proudfoot, this call came in past three in the morning. It's just hard for me to believe you can't remember anyone calling. Now, I know you've had some problems, struggling with the narcotics, some other entanglements, currently on parole...
Shep Proudfoot: So?
Marge: Well, associating with criminals, if you're the one they talked to, that right there would be a violation of your parole and would end with you back in Stillwater. Now, I saw some rough stuff on your priors, but nothing in the nature of a homicide. I know you don't want to be an accessory to something like that. So you think you might remember who those folks were who called ya?
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Mike Yanagita: So ya went and married Norm Son-of-a-Gunderson!
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Mike Yanagita: Ya know, it's the Radisson, so it's pretty good.
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Wade: Damn it! I wanna be a part of this thing!
Jerry: No, Wade! They were real clear! They said they'd call tomorrow with instructions and it's gonna be delivered by me alone!
Wade: It's my money, I'll deliver it--what do they care?
Stan Grossman: Wade's got a point there. I'll handle the call if you want, Jerry.
Jerry: No, no. See--they, no, see, they only deal with me. Ya feel this, this nervousness on the phone there, they're very-- these guys are dangerous.
Wade: All the more reason! I don't want you--with all due respect, Jerry, I don't want you mucking this up.
Jerry: The heck ya mean?
Wade: They want my money, they can deal with me. Otherwise I'm goin' to a professional. There's a million dollars here!
Jerry: No, see--
Wade: Look, Jerry, you're not sellin' me a damn car! It's my show here. That's that.
Stan Grossman: It's the way we prefer to handle it, Jerry.
Jerry: No, Wade! They were real clear! They said they'd call tomorrow with instructions and it's gonna be delivered by me alone!
Wade: It's my money, I'll deliver it--what do they care?
Stan Grossman: Wade's got a point there. I'll handle the call if you want, Jerry.
Jerry: No, no. See--they, no, see, they only deal with me. Ya feel this, this nervousness on the phone there, they're very-- these guys are dangerous.
Wade: All the more reason! I don't want you--with all due respect, Jerry, I don't want you mucking this up.
Jerry: The heck ya mean?
Wade: They want my money, they can deal with me. Otherwise I'm goin' to a professional. There's a million dollars here!
Jerry: No, see--
Wade: Look, Jerry, you're not sellin' me a damn car! It's my show here. That's that.
Stan Grossman: It's the way we prefer to handle it, Jerry.
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Mike Yanagita: She fought real hard, Margie