Eugene **** it all.
Scenes with Eugene
7 scenes Eugene 
Where are you going?
Eugene East-ish.
East-ish? You guys have no clue where you're going, do you?
Eugene Well, you haven't been here very long, right?
Why's that?
Eugene Because if anybody here had a clue they wouldn't be here in the first place.
I'm not going out tonight. It just makes me depressed.
Eugene So, what you gonna do? Kill yourself?
I dunno.. maybe.
Eugene As if anything could make you happy.
Eugene I'm not sitting in the back.
Why not?
Eugene Cause everybody knows guy in the back seat doesn't have a ****.
Eugene That's a fact. If the guy in the back seat had a **** he wouldn't be there in the first place.
Well... I mean, I got a ****, man, so.. I'm not.. Mik do you have a ****?
Yeah I have a ****. Big fat one.
Eugene Let me put this way. Since you got here, how many times did you get laid, man?
Why?
Eugene Just a question.
Actually laid?
Eugene Yes.
None, I think.
Eugene You think?
None! But what's that got to do with any of this?
Eugene Plenty. 'Cause your sperm count is so high, you think you're having an out of body experience like nobody in the **** universe, man.
Listen, you know what? Forget Desiree. I got another reason for you to go.
Eugene Give it shot.
You got anything better to do?
Eugene Cute? That's what they say about the puppy. The only thing worse is good friend, or nice person. In plain English it means I'll leech off you as long as I can, but don't even think about getting into my pants.
