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The Wizard of Oz

The Wizard of Oz quotes

83 total quotes

Dorothy Gale
Glinda, the Good Witch of the North
Multiple Characters
The Munchkins
The Scarecrow
The Cowardly Lion
The Tin Man
The Wicked Witch of the West


Dorothy: If you were king, you wouldn't be afraid of anything?
Cowardly Lion: Not nobody! Not no how!
Dorothy: Not even a rhinoceros?
Cowardly Lion: Imp-oceros!
Tin Man: How about a hippopotamus?
Cowardly Lion: Why, I'd thrash him from top to bottom-us!
Dorothy: Supposing you met an elephant?
Cowardly Lion: I'd knot him up in cellophant!
Scarecrow: What if it were a Brontosaurus?
Cowardly Lion: I'd show him who's King of the Forest!
Dorothy, Scarecrow, Tin Man: [in unison] How?
Cowardly Lion: How? Courage! What makes a king out of a slave? Courage! What makes the flag on a mast to wave? Courage! What makes an elephant charge his tusk, in the misty mist or the dusky dusk? What makes a muskrat guard his musk? Courage! What makes the sphinx the Seventh Wonder? Courage! What makes the dawn come up like THUNDER? Courage! What makes the Hottentot so hot? What puts the "ape" in apricot? What have they got that I ain't got?
Dorothy, Scarecrow, Tin Man: [in unison] Courage.
Cowardly Lion: You can say that again! [short pause; realizing] Hmm?


Dorothy: It really was no miracle, what happened was just this. The wind began to switch, the house to pitch. And suddenly the hinges started to unhitch. Just then the Witch, to satisfy an itch, went flying on her broomstick thumbin' for a hitch.
The Munchkins: [singing] And oh, what happened then was rich. The house began to pitch, the kitchen took a slitch. It landed on the Wicked Witch in the middle of a ditch. Which was not a healthy sit-uation for the Wicked Witch.

Dorothy: Now which way do we go?
Scarecrow: Pardon me. That way is a very nice way...[pointing]
Dorothy: Who said that?
[Toto barks at the Scarecrow]
Dorothy: Don't be silly, Toto. Scarecrows don't talk!
Scarecrow: It's pleasant down that way too!...[pointing in another direction]
Dorothy: That's funny. Wasn't he pointing the other way?
Scarecrow: Of course, people do go both ways [pointing in both directions] That's the trouble. I can't make up my mind. I haven't got a brain. Only straw.
Dorothy: How can you talk if you haven't got a brain?
The Scarecrow: I don't know. But some people without brains do an awful lot of talking, don't they?
Dorothy: Yes, I guess you're right.

Dorothy: Oh, now I'll never get home.
Cowardly Lion: Stay with us, then, Dorothy. We all love ya. We don't want ya to go.
Dorothy: That's very kind of you. But this could never be like Kansas. Auntie Em must have stopped wondering what happened to me by now. Oh, Scarecrow, what am I gonna do?
Scarecrow: [Notices Glinda's bubble] Look! There's someone who can help you.

Dorothy: Oh, will you help me? Can you help me?
Glinda: You don't need to be helped any longer. You've always had the power to go back to Kansas.
Dorothy: I have?
Scarecrow: Then why didn't you tell her before?
Glinda: She wouldn't have believed me. She had to learn it for herself.
Scarecrow: What have you learned, Dorothy?
Dorothy: Well, Iā€”I think that it, that it wasn't enough just to want to see Uncle Henry and Auntie Em ā€” and it's that ā€” if I ever go looking for my heart's desire again, I won't look any further than my own backyard. Because if it isn't there, I never really lost it to begin with! Is that right?
Glinda: That's all it is!
Scarecrow: But that's so easy! I should've thought of it for you -
Tin Man: I should have felt it in my heart -
Glinda: No, she had to find it out for herself. Now those magic slippers will take you home in two seconds!
Dorothy: Oh! Toto too?
Glinda: Toto too.
Dorothy: Now?
Glinda: Whenever you wish.
...
Glinda: Then close your eyes and tap your heels together three times. And think to yourself, 'There's no place like home'.

Dorothy: What kind of a horse is that? I've never seen a horse like that before!
Carriage Driver: No ā€” and never will again, I fancy. There's only one of him, and he's it. He's the "Horse of a Different Color" you've heard tell about.

Dorothy: Why can't we go with you and see all the Crowned Heads of Europe?
Professor Marvel: Do you know any? Oh, you mean the thing. [gesturing to his sign] I never do anything without consulting my crystal first. Let's go inside, and I'll show you..This is the same, genuine magic authentic crystal used by the priests of Isis and Osiris in the days of the Pharaohs of Egypt, in which Cleopatra first saw the approach of Julius Caesar and Marc Antony. And so on and so on. Now, you, uh, you'd better close your eyes for a moment, my child, so I can be in better tune with the infinite. [looks through her basket] We can't do these things without reaching out into the infinite. That's all right now, you can open them. We'll look into the crystal. What's this I see? A house with a picket fence and a barn with a weather vane of a...of a... running horse.
Dorothy: That's our farm.
Professor Marvel: I see a woman. She's wearing a polka-dot dress. Her face is careworn.
Dorothy: That's Auntie Em.
Professor Marvel: Her name is Emily.
Dorothy: That's right. What's she doing?
Professor Marvel: Well I, uh, I can't quite see. Why, she's crying. Someone has hurt her. Someone has just about broken her heart.
Dorothy: Me?
Professor Marvel: Well, it's uh, someone she loves very much. Someone she's been very kind to. Someone she's taken care of in sickness.
Dorothy: I had the measles once and she stayed right by me every minute. What's she doing now?
Professor Marvel: Well, she's, uh...What's this? Well, she's, she's putting her hand on her heart. Oh, she's, she's dropping down on the bed.
Dorothy: Oh, no, no, no.
Professor Marvel: Uh, that's it, the crystal's gone dark.
Dorothy: You don't suppose she could really be sick, do you? Oh, I've got to go home right away.

Dorothy: Why, it's a man. A man made out of tin!
Tin Man: [squeaking]
Dorothy: Did you say something?
Tin Man: [squeaking]
Dorothy: He said "oil can."
Scarecrow: Oil can what?
...
[Dorothy squirts oil onto the Tin Man and his arm loosens and falls]
Dorothy: Did that hurt?
Tin Man: No, it feels wonderful. I've held that axe up for ages.
Dorothy: How did you ever get like this?
Tin Man: Well, about a year ago, I was chopping that tree, when suddenly it began to rain. And right in the middle of a chop, I rusted solid. Been that way ever since.
Dorothy: Well, you're perfect now.
Tin Man: Perfect? Bang on my chest if you think I'm perfect. Go ahead, bang on it.
[Dorothy bangs on his chest, and it resonates loudly]
Scarecrow: Beautiful! What an echo!
Tin Man: It's empty. The tinsmith forgot to give me a heart.
Dorothy & Scarecrow: [in unison] No heart?
Tin Man: No heart. All hollow.

Dorothy: Why, Zeke, you're just as scared as I am!
Hunk: What's the matter? Gonna let a little ol' pig make a coward out of ya?
Hickory: Look at you, Zeke, you're just as white--
Auntie Em: Here, here, what's all this jabber-wapping when there's work to be done? I know three shiftless farm hands that'll be out of a job before they know it!
Hickory: Well, Dorothy was walking along the--
Auntie Em: I saw you tinkering with that contraption, Hickory. Now, you and Hunk get back to that wagon!
Hickory: All right, Mrs. Gale. But someday, they're gonna erect a statue to me in this town.
Auntie Em: Well, don't start posing for it now. Here, here, can't work on an empty stomach. Have some crullers.
Hunk: Gosh, Mrs. Gale.
Auntie Em: Just fried.
Hickory: Thanks.
Hunk: Swell.
Zeke: You see, Dorothy toppled in with the big Duroc--
Auntie Em: It's no place for Dorothy about a pig sty! Now, you go feed those hogs before they worry themselves into anemia!
Zeke: Yes,am.
Dorothy: Auntie Em, really, you know what Miss Gulch said she was gonna do to Toto? She said she was gonna--
Auntie Em: Now, Dorothy, dear, stop imagining things. You always yourself into a fret over nothing.
Dorothy: No--
Auntie Em: Now, you just help us out today, and find yourself a place where you won't get into any trouble.

Dorothy: You know, we were just wondering why you couldn't come with us to the Emerald City to ask the wizard for a heart.
Tin Man: But suppose the wizard wouldn't give me one once we got there?
Dorothy: Oh, but he will. He must. We've come such a long way already.
[the Wicked Witch appears on the rooftop of the Woodsman's cabin and cackles loudly]
Wicked Witch: You call that long?! Why, you've just begun! Helping the little lady along are you, my fine gentlemen? Well, stay away from her, [pointing to the Scarecrow] or I'll stuff a mattress with you! [toward the Tin Man] And you - I'll use you for a beehive. Here Scarecrow, want to play ball? [she hurls a ball of fire at the Scarecrow, who draws back in terror from the flames burning on the ground near him]
[The Tin Man quickly beats out the flames, as the witch disappears]
Scarecrow: I'm not afraid of her. I'll see you get safely to the Wizard now whether I get a brain or not. Stuff a mattress with me, eh? [tries to snap his fingers defiantly, but his gloved fingers produce no sound]
Tin Man: I'll see you reach the Wizard, whether I get a heart or not. Beehive! Bah! Let her try and make a beehive out of me! [snaps his fingers, making a harsh "clank" sound]
Dorothy: Oh, you're the best friends anybody ever had! And it's funny, but I feel as if I've known you all the time. But I couldn't have, could I?
...
Dorothy, Scarecrow, Tin Man: [singing in unison] We're off to see the Wizard, the Wonderful Wizard of Oz.

Glinda: Are you a good witch, or a bad witch?
Dorothy: Who, me? Why, I'm not a witch at all. I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas.
Glinda: Oh, well, is that a witch [gesturing toward Toto]?
Dorothy: Toto? Toto's my dog.
Glinda: Well, I'm a little muddled. The Munchkins called me because a new witch has just dropped a house on the Wicked Witch of the East. And there's the house, and here you are, and that's all that's left of the Wicked Witch of the East. And so, what the Munchkins want to know is, are you a Good Witch or a Bad Witch?
Dorothy: Oh, but I've already told you, I'm not a witch at all! Witches are old and ugly. [The Munchkins giggle from concealment] What was that?
Glinda: The Munchkins. They're laughing because I am a witch. I'm Glinda, the Witch of the North.
Dorothy: You are?! Oh, I beg your pardon! But I've never heard of a beautiful witch before.
Glinda: Only bad witches are ugly. The Munchkins are happy because you have freed them from the Wicked Witch of the East.
Dorothy: Oh, but if you please, what are Munchkins?
Glinda: The little people who live in this land. It's Munchkinland. And you are their national heroine, my dear.

Hunk: Now look it, Dorothy. You ain't usin' your head about Miss Gulch. Think you didn't have any brains at all!
Dorothy: I have so got brains.
Hunk: Well, why don't you use 'em? When you come home, don't go by Miss Gulch's place. Then Toto won't get in her garden, and you won't get in no trouble, see?
Dorothy: Oh, Hunk. You just won't listen, that's all.
Hunk: Well, your head ain't made of straw, you know.

Lion: [Climbing to the castle] I hope my strength holds out.
Tin Man: I hope your tail holds out!

Miss Gulch: Mr. Gale!
Uncle Henry: Howdy, Miss Gulch.
Miss Gulch: I want to see you and your wife right away about Dorothy.
Uncle Henry: Dorothy? Well, what has Dorothy done?
Miss Gulch: What's she done? I'm all but lame from the bite on my leg.
Uncle Henry: You mean she bit ya?
Miss Gulch: No, her dog.
Uncle Henry: Oh, she bit her dog, eh?
Miss Gulch: No!

Miss Gulch: That dog's a menace to the community. I'm taking him to the sheriff to make sure he's destroyed.
Dorothy: Destroyed? Toto? Oh, you can't! You mustn't! Auntie Em, Uncle Henry, you won't let her, will ya?
Uncle Henry: Course we won't. Will we, Em?
Dorothy: Please, Aunt Em. Toto didn't mean to. He didn't know he was doing anything wrong. I'm the one that ought to be punished. I let him go in her garden. You can send me to bed without supper.
Miss Gulch: If you don't hand over that dog, I'll bring a damage suit that will take your whole farm! There's a law protectin' folks against dogs that bite!
Auntie Em: How would it be if she keeps him tied up? He's really gentle, with gentle people, that is.
Miss Gulch: Well, that's for the sheriff to decide. Here's his order, allowing me to take him, unless you want to go against the law.
Auntie Em: We can't go against the law, Dorothy. I'm afraid poor Toto will have to go.
Miss Gulch: [holding up a basket] Now you're seeing the reason. Here's what I'm taking him in, so he can't attack me again!
Dorothy: No, no, I won't let you take him! You go away, you, or I'll bite you myself!
Auntie Em: Dorothy!
Dorothy: You wicked old witch! Uncle Henry, Auntie Em, don't let her take him! [struggles with Miss Gulch]
Miss Gulch: I've got an order!
Auntie Em: Put him in the basket, Henry.
Dorothy: Oh Toto. [runs out, crying]
Miss Gulch: The idea!
Auntie Em: Almira Gulch, just because you own half the county doesn't mean you have the power to run the rest of us. For twenty-three years, I've been dying to tell you what I thought of you. And now, well, being a Christian woman, I can't say it!