Adele
I think David got a little messed up.
Dave
What did she say?
Wally
She said she thinks you're an asshole!
See No Evil, Hear No Evil quotes
Page 1 of 2 Dave
Adele
Why do you feel you have to pass for someone with 20/20 vision when you're blind as a bat?
Wally
I don't feel. I have to pass.
Adele
Yes, you do. It's a sickness in your brain, just like if you were trying to pass for white.
Wally
You mean I'm not white?
Cabbie
Let me see a badge!
Kirgo
[holds up gun]
This is my badge!
Captain Braddock
32 years on the force, a wife and three kids and a blind guy and a deaf guy are making me look like a real asshole.
Gatlin
You got that right.
Captain Braddock
What?
Gatlin
[talking into radio]
Charlie over.
Captain Braddock
Okay, no more bullshit. [to Dave, talking fast] Was there or wasn't there a woman?
Dave
Are you serious?
Captain Braddock
Yes, I'm goddamn serious.
Dave
Fuzzy Wuzzy was a woman?
Captain Braddock
What the hell is he talking about?
Wally
He reads lips. You're talking too fast.
Captain Braddock
[to Dave, talking slowly]
Was there... a wom-an... pres-ent?
Dave
[to Captain Braddock, talking slowly]
Yes. There was... a wom-an... pres-ent.
Captain Braddock
[to Wally]
Why is he talking like that?
Wally
[to Captain Braddock, talking slowly]
Because he's deaf... not stu-pid.
Captain Braddock
What's the story here, Gatlin? I got the commissioner crawling up my ass!
Dave
And then one day, my wife turned into this remarkable creature that could sit on the end of a broomstick and take off. She could actually achieve flight.
Wally
I think I was married to that woman once.
Dave
Small world.
Dave
****-A. Something bothers you, **** it. Your wife leaves you, **** her. Your boss fires you, **** him. ****-A. **** them. Right?
Wally
You're **** right!
Dave
It's a gift to be able to do that.
Dave
Tell me the first thing that pops in your head.
Wally
Pussy!
Dave
Wally! He could put a hole through your *head*, Wally!
Wally
****** him and his holes!
Dave
Who are you talking to?
Wally
I'm talking to you, you prick.
Dave
Why don't you look me in the eye and say that?
Wally
I would if I could but I can't, I'm blind.
Dave
You're blind?
Wally
Yes, I'm blind. What are you, **** deaf?
Dave
YES! I'M **** DEAF!
Wally
You're really deaf?
Dave
I'm really deaf.
Wally
Then how do you know what I'm saying?
Dave
Because I'm reading your lips. Now you want the job or not?
Dave
You swear an awful lot.
Wally
You're ****-A right!
Dave
[to Raoul]
Stop right there or I'll throw this knife through your head! I mean it! I throw your brains out!
Cop with Bullhorn
[to Raoul]
Freeze!
Dave
[to Raoul]
That's more like it! Now put your hand up!
Cop with Bullhorn
[to Raoul]
Put your hands in the air!
Dave
[to Raoul]
Oh, so you do speak English!
Dr. Cornfeld
WHO are you, sir?
Dave
[misreading Cornfeld's lips]
Fine, thank you!
Eve
Any last requests, Mr. Karue?
Wally
I suppose a **** is out of the question.
Eve
I'm afraid so.