Chief [Tulio gasps]
Big smile. Like you mean it. A-one, two, three.
["It's Tough to Be a God" begins]
♪I hardly think I'm qualified. To come across all sanctified. I just don't cut it with the cherubim.♪
[the baby bites Tulio's finger]
Tulio, what are you talking about? ♪There again, they're on their knees. Being worshipped is a breeze. Which rather suits us in. The interim.♪
♪Interim, interim, it's me and him.♪ Oh, my God!
A All
♪It's tough to be a god!♪
♪Tread where mortals have not trod. Be deified when really you're a sham!♪
[Altivo bites the fruit]
♪Be an object of devotion, be the subject of psalms!♪
♪It's a rather touching notion! All those prayers and those salaams!♪
♪And who am I to bridle? If I'm forced to be an idol? If they say that I'm a god. That's what I am! What's more if we don't comply, with the locals' wishes, I can see us being sacrificed. Or stuffed.♪
You have a point there. Very good thinking. ♪So let's be gods! The perks are great!♪
♪El Dorado on our plates.♪
♪Local feelings should not be rebuffed.♪
♪Never rebuffed. I never rebuff a local feeling. No, my friend.♪
A All
♪It's tough to be a god! But if you get the people's nod! Count your blessings! Yeah, keep 'em sweet! That's our advice!♪
A All
♪Be a symbol of perfection! Be a legend, be a cult! Take their praise, take a collection! As the multitudes exalt!♪
♪Don a supernatural habit!♪
♪We'd be crazy not to grab it!♪
A All
♪So sign on two new gods for paradise! Paradise!♪
[they both tap their cups, then Chief dances with the group, then Altivo dances, laying down on the ground, fade to black]
[cut back to El Dorado]
Ai-ai-ai.
♪Tons of gold for you, hah!♪
♪And tons of gold for me, hoo!♪
MA Miguel and Tulio
♪And tons of gold for we, ah!♪
Not bad for a day's work, eh?
Yeah. We just became richer than the king of Spain. [laughing]
You know, speaking of kings, the chief and the high priest seem a bit, uh, tense.
Buenos Dias! Listen, all we have to do is keep playing the one against the other. You know, do a little god dance, chant some mystic mumbo jumbo, dazzle 'em with some smoke and mirrors and then get the hell back to Spain.
Um, Tulio, how are we gonna get all this back to Spain?
Chief A boat?
Um, we really hate to be ascending so soon, but, uh, some urgent business has come up, family matters, you know, and it's just a bit...
Badda-bing, budda-boom, you know what I mean?
Chief Oh, we expected you to be staying with us for the next thousand years.
Well, as we say in the spirit world, there's your plan and then, there's the gods' plan.
And our plan, uh, calls for a boat, 'cause we're gonna ascend kind of in a horizontal pattern at first.
[Miguel chuckles]
And then we're gonna go vertical, uh, as we get further out to sea.
Chief Hmm. To build a boat large and glorious enough, would take about a week.
Uh, I wonder how long it would take Tzekel-Kan to do it.
Chief But for the gods, uh, three days.
Well, if that's the best you can do.
Chief Oh, perhaps if you were not burdened with so much tribute, you could leave sooner.
Hmm? I like it here. Miguel?
Yep, yep. Three days is just fine.
Well, it's, um, uh, nice.
Chief Nice?
Yes, nice. But? Um, but, uh, is it really fit for the gods?
Chief My lord.
[chuckling]
I have been around boats, believe me, and that, um, the pointy, tall, um, the long up and down thing.
Chief The mast?
The mast, yes, yes. The mast is good. Well, look at it. [stammering] There's not nearly enough, uh, um, rope.
Chief Rope?
Yes, rope. Exactly my point. Vertical ascension requires a lot more, uh, rope.
Chief My lord. [chuckling]
And look at this. [grunting, tapping on the bloat, clears his throat] This doesn't look at all secure. Chief, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, but in all, it is a complete do-over. [continues looking down]
Chief Hmm. You know, Lord Miguel, if you wish to stay, you only need to say so.
Chief Of course.
[looks at a cave]
Oh, no, I can't. I have to go back with Tulio. We're... We're partners.
Chief Big plans in the other world, huh?
Chief Well, then, I better go get some more rope, huh?
Oh, Chief, um, forget about the rope. Um, my mistake.
Chief Hey, to err is human.
[Miguel looks at Chief, stepping in a boat, walking up the building]
[Miguel walks away by Altivo, then Altivo looks at Miguel walking away]
Whoa. Whoa, boy, what is it? [Altivo nickers, then they hear explosions, looking at Miguel along with Chel and Tulio]
Chief [the man rushes to the Chief who panics]
My lord, what is it?
M Man
[panicked]
Chief Tanni! Chief Tanni! Approaching the city, is an army of strangers.
Chief We are safe here. They'll never find the gate to the city.
M Man
But, sire, they are being led by Tzekel-Kan.
Chief [shocked to Tzekel-Kan who is survived]
HE SURVIVED! Warriors, prepare yourselves for battle!
[the guards all shout and as the crowd starts in panic]
Chief, you cannot fight them!
Chief Then how can we stop them?
[looks in the cave]
Uh, one moment, please. [moves the gold away]
[Bibo drinks] [takes the necklace out]
Okay, here's the gate. Here's the boat.
Well, here's the "goat," and here's the "bate."
[Tulio his Bibo, who stops drinking his cup, spilling water out, knocking the necklace] [gasping]
That's it. We'll crash the boat into the pillars.
That's it? I mean... But... [scoffs] What about the gold?
Well... [sobbing, in a whinny voice] Chief! [clears throat, in a normal voice] Chief. I've got a plan.
Chief [the men throw rope to the villagers]
Hold the line steady! They're almost in place!
C Cortes
[cut to Crotes and the guards, and Tzekel-Kan]
It better be there, for your sake.
[Tulio rows a boat, then Chel shakes her head, looking at Miguel]
Okay, chief, on my signal! Ready! HIT THE PILLARS!
Chief NOW!
[the man uses a log to push and break the whole rocks, then Tulio looks at the whole rocks breaking]
They're breaking too fast!
[tires to pull the rope down]
It's stuck!
[the men try to pull a statue, breaking the ropes, then they both shout, then Chief gasps, grabbing the ropes]
They're not gonna make it. Altivo! [jumps on Altivo, running to the boat]
[Miguel and Altivo jump on the boat in slow motion, then they continue pulling, then flying in slow motion, grabbing the sail]
Get off the boat, Miguel, or you'll never see the city again.
I know. [takes the hat off] You don't think I'm gonna let you have all the fun, do you? Come on. We've got a wave to catch. [grabs a paddle to Tulio, pointing to Chief]
[they all release the statue, then Miguel yells, then Chel whimpers, then grabbing a lever]
Get out of the way!
[they duck, then Bibo runs on the gold]
Hold on!
[they all go in the cave, breaking the sail, then knocking the gold on the walls]
We're gonna have to hit it BROADSIDE!
THAT'S YOUR PLAN? But the gold!
[Chel gasps]
JUST TURN THE BOAT!
[they all turn the boat]
On impact, EVERYBODY JUMP!
[the boat stops on a wall, then they all jump out of the boat, then they splash in the water, with rocks falling in the water, with waterfall spitting out, then they all cough] [panting]
We made it. It worked. [chuckling] It worked.
Wait. Get down! [grabs Tulio] There they are. [they all look at Cortes and Tzekel-Kan]
[gasping, looking at the rocks]
No.
C Cortes
[walks to Tzekel-Kan]
You lying heathen. There's nothing here at all.
C Cortes
[pushes Tzekel-Kan]
Men, seize him!
WHAT? [the men grab Tzekel-Kan]
C Cortes
There is no El Dorado here. Onward, men. [the guards continues takes Tzekel-Kan away, gasps, then Chel waves]
[to guards]
Wait! No, wait! [echoes] WAIT!
