The Caller
That isn't very nice, Stu.
Stu
Did you call me Stu? Who's Stu? I don't know any Stu.
The Caller
Why, do you prefer Stuart?
Scenes with The Caller
25 scenes The Caller
Stu
The Caller
Stu
Where? Where are you?
The Caller
There are hundred of windows out there. Why don't you check them out?
Stu
You can see me right now?
The Caller
Uh-huh.
Stu
What am I doing?
The Caller
[Stu scratches himself]
You're scratching your ear. Now you're brushing your hair back.
The Caller
[Stu gives the finger to the windows in the buildings around him]
That's not very nice, Stu.
The Caller
Well, there is someone I'd like you to call.
Stu
Name it.
The Caller
Try the number you dialed when you first got into the booth.
Stu
[Stu laughs nervously]
I don't know what you're talking about pal.
The Caller
No? Lucky you then, because I wrote it down. I can see every number you pressed. Let's see if Pam is still at work.
Stu
No!
The Caller
Then I guess I'll have to do it.
Stu
Look don't!
The Caller
Too late. It's already ringing. I'll put her on speaker so you can hear.
Stu
Yer **** kiddin'!
The Caller
Stu, I never kid.
The Caller
Think about it. Why would a guy with a cell phone call a woman everyday from a phone booth?
Pam
He said it was quiet.
The Caller
Pam, that's just stupid.
Stu
So you'd just whack me for no particular reason?
The Caller
Oh, I've got plenty of reasons. And you keep giving me more.
Stu
You shoot a gun here there'll be pandemonium, cops will be swarming all over the block
The Caller
Think so? Let's see. One...
The Caller
[Stu ducks]
Two. That won't help you. Three!
The Caller
[fires gun and shoots a toy robot next to the phone booth - no one notices] [deadpan alarm]
Oh Stu, look at everybody... Look at all the people screaming, Stu. Here come the cops. Sniper on the roof. Gunfire. Hit the deck.
Stu
What did I do to deserve this, huh? Why me?
The Caller
If you have to ask, then you're not ready to know yet.
The Caller
If only you had dealt with the man decently, this might not have been necessary.
Stu
I offered him money. I offered him my watch.
The Caller
But not your respect, which is what he really wanted. You were dismissive, just as you were to the nice pizza guy. You are guilty of inhumanity to your fellow man.
Pamela McFadden
[the Caller phones Stu's girlfriend Pam]
Hi, who's this?
The Caller
It's a good friend of Stu's. And he hasn't got many.
Pamela McFadden
You know Stu?
The Caller
I know he lies.
The Caller
You're in this position because you're not telling the truth.
Stu
No, I'm in this **** position because YOU HAVE A GUN!
The Caller
[about Stu's wife, Kelly]
You think she didn't know she was being watched.
Stu
What?
The Caller
But beautiful women always know. That false indifference, superior air. It's just a tease. They want eyes on them. Why does she put on her make up? Do her hair? Dress so nicely? Not for her husband which she hardly ever sees, no, it's for somebody else to notice... I notice.
The Caller
You'd shoot me if you had the chance, wouldn't you?
Stu
With a big **** smile on my face.
The Caller
There's the spirit.
The Caller
If this is true Stuart, then I have to take somebody with me don't I? And since Kelly is the most important thing in your life, I'll take her.
Stu
No, take me! I'm the **** one you want! Take me!
The Caller
[Stu is not answering The Caller]
Stu, don't do this. Please, come on. My sainted mother used to do this. She used to dish this out... Stu, please don't this. Stu, you're bringing back my unhappy childhood. Stu, talk to me, please! Talk to me! I can't take it Stu... Ahh!
The Caller
[the Caller laughs]
I'm kidding. I had a very happy childhood.
The Caller
What they don't know, we do to them in our minds, isn't that right?
Stu
You sick ****!
The Caller
Perfect violation.
Stu
[to Caller]
Stay the **** out of this
Capt. Ramey
Who do you keep talking to on the phone?
Stu
Nobody
Capt. Ramey
Your ah... your friend, your parent, your lover? Who?
The Caller
Careful, Stuart. Careful.
Stu
My psychiatrist.
The Caller
[laughs]
Excellent! I should have thought of that.
Stu
I already told you this is a private conversation. Now, what the **** do you want?
Capt. Ramey
I just want you to know, that it's safe outside the booth.
The Caller
No, it's not.
Stu
Always get out of the booth. I like in the **** booth. It's my whole world now, this is my booth and I'm not coming out ever. You hear me? Never.
Stu
You shoot the guy, and I'm responsible?
The Caller
It looked that way from up here.
Stu
I don't know what I did to you, but whatever it was I'm glad. Alright, I wish it had been worse, I wish you had **** died.
The Caller
Yes! Finally some honesty.
The Caller
There are rounds left in it.
Stu
I totally couldn't give a shit.
The Caller
What if I told you I was just above the theatre, four floors up? See the pink curtains? There you go Stuart yes... Yoohoo... Yoohoo.
Stu
[laughs]
Why did you do that?
The Caller
Because it's fun!
The Caller
The odds are even now Stu. Isn't that what you wanted? You know where I am and you have a gun. If you have it in you, you can take me down.
Stu
****! They'll kill me before I can get a shot at you.
The Caller
Ah you're probably right. I wasn't really there anyway. You would've just spoiled some nice lady's curtains.
The Caller
Stu, you didn't tell your wife the truth, you're cheating.
Stu
I'm not cheating on Kelly! I never have!
The Caller
Oh, then what do you call it?
Stu
Look, you're a guy, sometimes you wanna know it's a possibility, alright? You know, it's like having a beautiful home, but you still dream of that quick vacation down there, you know, some nice hotel, a great view, I don't know, maybe a pool. But it's a just a fantasy because you'll never really leave home! Do you hear what I'm saying?
The Caller
[laughs]
Kelly is a home and Pam is a motel. I'm sure they'll both appreciate that.
Stu
Oh, **** you!
The Caller
Hey, that kind of language is uncalled for.
The Caller
And I wanted to **** her.
Stu
And I wanted to sleep with her.
The Caller
No, and I wanted to **** her. Say it. SAY IT!
Stu
And I wanted to **** her. I'm sorry.
Kelly Shepard
Whatever you did, I don't care.
Kelly Shepard
[Sobs sweetly]
Please just... come out of the booth, OK?
Stu
That's all I did. That's all I did, I'm sorry.
Stu
[to the caller]
Alright, I've done what you asked. That's it. I've had enough of this game.
The Caller
I haven't.
Stu
You said you'd let us go.
The Caller
I changed my mind.
Stu
You miserable ****! You can't do this... you can't do this to me. I took all your shit... I did everything you **** asked.
Stu
[the Caller just starts laughing again]
Alright, you lied to me. I've had enough of this game. I've **** had enough. You go **** yourself. Later.
[Hangs up]
The Caller
[Pam has just arrived at the scene]
Looks like someone watches the news.
Stu
Who?
The Caller
[Referring to Pam]
The motel.
Stu
Oh God.
The Caller
I think she could use a new headshot.
Stu
Don't!
The Caller
Then take down the gun!
Stu
Look, this has nothing to do with her!
The Caller
She has everything to do with this, Stuart! You're here because you called her, she's here because you called her, now take it down! Don't make me hurt Pam, Stuart, take down the gun.
Stu
[Stu begins to lift up the ceiling panel to get the gun planted there]
There's nothing there.
The Caller
Nothing but your fingerprints on the finest cop killer money can buy. Come on Stu, lets see it.
