Welcome to the library, young man. Don't tell me, you're here for a special book.
Uh, Mister...
Stop, stop stop, let me guess. I have a talent for guessing what people need. You're in need of... [starts speaking magically] a fantasy. Brave knights, mythical faeries, ferocious dragons.
Look, all I want is...
[grabbing him and speaking excitedly]
Adventure!! Of course, you're a boy who loves adventure, brimming with wicked demons, cutthroat pirates.
No, no. That's not it.
Horror. [speaking scarily while creeping toward him] Ahh, horror. Evil demons, wretched monsters, haunted houses, graveya-a-rds. Yes, it's horror for you, boy. I'm sure of it. [back to normal voice] Your library card, please.
Uh, I don't have one.
[makes a library card appear magically]
You do now.
