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Mr. Deeds

Mr. Deeds quotes

23 total quotes

Mr. Deeds


View Quote Babe: [reads the card Deeds wrote for her] Hard to breathe, feels like floating.
So full of love, my heart's exploding.
Mouth is dry, hands are shaking.
My heart is yours for the taking.
Acting weird, not myself.
Dancing around like the Keebler elf.
Finally time, for this poor schlub
to know how it feels, to fall in lub.
Deeds: I couldn't think of anything else that rhymes with schlub. Rub and tub didn't work.
View Quote Babe: And this is my brother Denny's room,
[opens a closet door]
Babe: They didn't like my brother very much.
View Quote Babe: Oh, you have got to be shittin' me.
Deeds: Whoa... that's the first time I've heard you curse.
Babe: I'm that excited.
View Quote Cedar: Excuse me. Is Mr. Deeds around?
Jan: No, I'm sorry. He's out making deliveries. The regular delivery guy called in sick. But you don't look too sick to me, Murph.
Murph: Oh! I forgot I was fakin' sick today. [to Cedar and Cecil] You two tricked me into comin' here.
Jan: Murph, put on an apron and gimme a hand.
Murph: [sets to work] You guys played me like a fiddle. Touche!
Cecil: Is Mrs. Deeds around?
Jan: Mrs. Deeds!? I don't think that poor boy ever had a date.
View Quote Cedar: We're looking for somebody. Longfellow Deeds.
Murph: Wow! Is that Deeds' first name?
Cecil: Well, if the Deeds you're referring to is Longfellow Deeds, then yes, that is Deeds's first name.
Murph: Well, I don't know Deeds's first name. Maybe it's Greg.
Cecil: Maybe it's Longfellow.
Murph: Maybe. But I don't know. I know another guy named Greg. You want me to call him up?
Cedar: No! Thank you. Please. Just tell us where Deeds lives.
View Quote Consuela: Want me to wipe the leaves on your ficus tree, Mr. Blake?
Blake: You can call me Preston.
Consuela: Want me to wipe the leaves on your ficus tree, Preston?
Blake: Yes. Yes! YES!
[they embrace wildly]
View Quote Deeds: So how is the elevator business treating you, Reuben?
Reuben: Oh, it has its ups and downs.
[both laugh]
View Quote Deeds: Crazy Eyes.
Crazy Eyes: Hey, Deeds.
Deeds: How you doin', pal? I got your pizza for you, just the way you like it.
Crazy Eyes: Oh, yes. French Fries and Oreos, you know me all too well, Deeds.
View Quote Deeds: What are you in for?
Crazy Eyes: Eh, I'm doin' an overnighter for bitin' the mailman.
[waves his hand]
Crazy Eyes: He was tryin' to cast some spell on me like a wizard or somethin'.
Deeds: You sure about that?
Crazy Eyes: I don't know, maybe he was just wavin'.
[waves hand then sees Chuck and Cecil]
Crazy Eyes: Who're your friends?
Deeds: This is Chuck and Cecil, they're visiting from New York.
Crazy Eyes: I don't like 'em.
Deeds: Okay, then.
View Quote Deeds: Whoa, you kinda snuck up on me there...
Emilio: I am very very sneaky, sir.
View Quote Deeds: You climbed mountains and built skyscrapers.
You made TV shows and put out newspapers.
You were wicked good at doing stocks.
You liked it when Emilio would change your socks.
We never hung out and that makes me sad.
All the good times we could've had.
But when I die, Uncle Preston, you better say "Cheers".
Cause when me and you are hanging at the pearly gates, I'll bring the beers. I'll bring the beers.
Reverend Sharpton: Nice rhyme, nice rhyme.
View Quote Emilio: How can I thank you?
Deeds: All I want is your friendship, Emilio. You're a good man.
Emilio: Deeds! How about a billion dollars?
Deeds: All right.
Emilio: Done.
View Quote Mac: Are you gonna see him again tonight?
Babe: Yes. I'm calling him around 4:00. It's when I get off work. Remember, I'm Pam Dawson, virgin school nurse from Winchestertonfieldville, Iowa.
[both laugh]
Mac: That's priceless! You, a virgin!
View Quote McEnroe: I like the way you beat up those guys who were making fun of you. It was pretty cool.
Deeds: Yeah I bet you know what it's like to get all riled up, Johnny Mac.
McEnroe: That I do.
View Quote Murph: Hey, look, Deedsy is hanging out with McEnroe!
Crazy Eyes: I love The Beach Boys.