Oogway There are no accidents.
Most-quoted character in Kung Fu Panda (2008): in 40 of its 98 quotes
Most scenes with: Po (20), Shifu (15), Master Tigress (6)
There is a saying. Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. That is why we call it the present.
More lines from Oogway
8 quotes Oogway Oogway I sense the Dragon Warrior is among us...
Oogway The universe has brought us the Dragon Warrior!
Oogway No. You just need to believe.
Oogway I see you have found the Sacred Peach Tree of Heavenly Wisdom.
Oogway Look at this tree, Shifu. I cannot make it blossom when it suits me, nor make it bear fruit before its time.
Oogway Quit, don't quit. Noodles, don't noodles. You are too concerned with what was, and what will be.
Oogway One often meets his destiny on the road he takes to avoid it.
Scenes with Oogway
31 scenes
What are you going to do, big guy? Sit on me?
Don't tempt me. [Laughs] Now, I'm gonna use this. [Holds up the Dragon Scroll] You want it? Come get it.
You're just a big... fat... panda! (Po grabs his finger)
I'm not a big fat panda. I'm THE big fat panda.
(Po had grabbed some rubble from a plate Tigress just broke)
Put that down! The only souvenirs we collect here are bloody knuckles and broken bones!
Are you ready?
I was born ready- (Viper proceeds to beat Po up)
I'm sorry, brother! I thought you said you were ready!
That was awesome! Let's go again!
Wolf Bandit
(During Po's dream sequence)
He's too awesome!
Female Bystander
And attractive!
Bar owner
How can we repay you?
There is no charge for awesomeness. Or attractiveness.
One would think that Master Oogway would choose someone who actually knew kung fu.
Yeah, or at least touch his toes.
Or even see his toes.
Oogway There are no accidents.
Oogway Well, that was no accident either.
Thrice.
Lets just start at zero; Level Zero.
Oh no. There is no such thing as Level Zero.
Hey! Maybe I can start on that! (Walks over to the punching bag-like object)
That? We use that for training children and propping the door open when it's hot!
Perfect! (Notices the Furious Five watching him with curious expressions) Eh... you just want me to wait until they go back on their own thing or...
Never mind them, go on, hit it.
Eh...okay...(Starts doing quick movements with his feet and mumbling to himself)
Would you hit it?!
Right....(Taps it, making it wobble)
Why don't you try again? A little harder?
Right...(Hits it harder, making it lean back a lot) How's th-- (is hit by it and sent flying into the moving ropes and swinging pendulums, only to be thrusted into Crane's tilting bowl, hitting his head several times until it tips over into the moving arm guard section, where it sets off a chain reaction that causes one to hit him in the groin) Ooooo-hoo-hoo! My tenders...(Slowly starts to move, activating the arms and smacking him into the fire floor area. The camera pans back to Shifu and the Furious Five, and we hear the fire activate and Po screaming. He slumps over next to Shifu, burnt and charred) How did I do?
There is now a Level Zero. (Puts out a flame on top of Po's head)
(Po is making dinner for The Furious Five)
So I'm like "Fine. You may be a wolf. You may be the scariest bandit in the Fujian Province, but you're a lousy tipper!"
Really? So how'd you get out of there alive?
I mean, I didn't, I didn't actually say that... but I thought it... in... in my mind. If he could read my mind he woulda been like "What?" Order up.
(Shifu walks in to see Po in the kitchen, having just punched through a clear stone cupboard and is currently eating its contents) (Sees Shifu and stops; Shifu looks around the kitchen)
...What? (angrily now) I eat when I'm upset, okay?
(Getting inspiration)
Oh, no need to explain. I just thought you might be Monkey... He hides his almond cookies on the top shelf. (Pretends to walk off and leans against the wall beside the doorway, hearing a bit of scuffling. When he looks in, Po is 10 feet above the ground, doing a perfect split to keep himself airborne and is currently shoveling Monkey's almond cookies into his face. After a minute, Po sees Shifu)
It is said that the Dragon Warrior can survive for months at a time on nothing but the dew of a single Ginko leaf and the energy of the universe.
I guess my body doesn't know it's the Dragon Warrior yet, heh heh. I'mma need a lot more than dew, and, uh, universe juice. (he slurps his noodles, with one hanging over his nose; everyone laughs) What?
Oh, nothing, ...Master Shifu. (everyone laughs again.)
Po (impersonating Master Shifu): You will never be the Dragon Warrior unless you lose 500 pounds and brush your teeth. (The Furious Five, except Tigress, laugh) What is that noise you're making? Laughter? I have never heard of it! Work hard, Panda, and maybe someday you will have ears like mine! (he brings two bowls up to his head to mimic ears; the Furious Five laugh, but stop and see Shifu behind Po) Ears. It's not working for ya? I thought they're pretty good...
Monkey (whispering): It's Shifu!
Of course it's Shifu, who do you think I'm doing? (Monkey points to the door. Po looks and sees Shifu.)
Oh, Master Shifu! Uh.... (Slurps the noodle and accidently presses the bowls to his chest so he looks like he has on a bikini bottom top. The Five laugh.)
(Mantis is giving Po acupuncture)
I thought you said acupuncture would make me feel [Mantis strikes another needle] better...
Trust me, it will. It's just not easy finding the right nerve points under all this...
Fat?
Fur. I was gonna say fur.
Sure you were.
The Sword of Heroes! Said to be so sharp you can get cut just by looking at - Ow!
The Wuxi finger hold!
Oh, you know this hold?
You're bluffing. You're bluffing! Shifu didn't teach you that!
Nope. I figured it out. (Po then flexes his pinky finger) Skadoosh!
Oogway Look at this tree, Shifu. (Indicates the Peach Tree of Heavenly Wisdom) I cannot make it blossom when it suits me, nor make it bear fruit before its time.
But there are things we can control! (Slams a fist into the tree, making several peaches fall around them) I can control where the fruit will fall! (Catches a peach, cuts it in half, takes the pit and slams it into the ground) And I can control where to plant the seed! That is no illusion, Master!
Oogway Ah, yes. But no matter what you do, that seed will grow to be a peach tree. You may wish for an apple or an orange, but you will get a peach.
But a peach cannot defeat Tai Lung!
Oogway Maybe it can - if you are willing to guide it, to nurture it, to believe in it.
(After Shifu keeps stealing Po's dumplings at a picnic)
Shifu (calmly): You are free to eat.
AM I !?
ARE YOU !? (Chopstick battle begins)
Our only hope is the Dragon Warrior.
The panda?
Yes, the panda!
Master, please! [pushes her chair out] Let us stop Tai Lung. This is what you've trained us for!
No! It is not your destiny to defeat Tai Lung, it is his! [points at Po, then realizes he's not there] Where'd he go? [cut to where Po is running down the stairs, screaming, only to be stopped by Shifu] You cannot leave! A real warrior never quits!
Watch me! [tries to run down the stairs, but Shifu uses the stick to turn Po around] Come on! How am I supposed to beat Tai Lung? I can't even beat you to the stairs!
You will beat him because you are the Dragon Warrior! [pokes Po in his stomach]
Ow! You don't believe that! [Shifu swipes at his hand with Oogway's stick] Ooh! You never believed that! From the first moment I got here, you've been trying to get rid of me! [Shifu knocks him to the ground]
Yes! I was! But now I ask you to trust in your master... as I have come to trust in mine.
You're not my master. And I'm not the Dragon Warrior.
Then why didn't you quit? You knew I was trying to get rid of you, yet you stayed!
Yeah, I stayed. I stayed because every time you threw a brick on my head or said I smelled, it hurt, but it could never hurt more than I did every day of my life just being me. I stayed because I thought if anyone could change me, could make me... not me, it was you! The greatest kung fu teacher in all of China!
But I can change you! I can turn you into the Dragon Warrior! And I will!
Come on! Tai Lung is on his way here right now! And even if it takes him a hundred years to get here, how are you gonna change this into the Dragon Warrior? Huh? How?... How?... How?!?
I don't know!! [sighs] I don't know...
[after Tigress lectures Po and he makes a weird facial expression]
Oh, that's it! [about to punch him]
Wait! My fault! I accidentally tweaked his facial nerve! [Po falls over with his back full of needles] ...And I may have also stopped his heart.
Tai Lung (leaning on the bridge): Where's the Dragon Warrior?
How do you know you're not looking at her? (Tai Lung laughs)
You think I'm a fool? I know you're not the Dragon Warrior. None of you. (the Furious Five) I heard how he fell out of the sky on a ball of fire. That he's a warrior unlike anything the world has ever seen.
Po?
So that is his name. Po. Finally! A worthy opponent. Our battle will be legendary!
Po (in awe): No! The legendary Urn of Whispering Warriors; said to contain the souls of the entire Tenshu Army! [pauses before whispering] Hello?
Have you finished sight-seeing? [Po gasps]
My patience has worn thin.
Oh, well it's not like you were going anywhere.
Would you please turn around?
But he will.
He's not gonna quit, is he?
He's not gonna quit bouncing, I can tell you that.
Gang Boss
[In Po's dream sequence]
I see you like to chew. Maybe you should chew on my fist!
Master, master! I have... it- it's very bad news!!
Oogway Ah, Shifu. There is just news- there is no good or bad.
Master, your vision- your vision was right! Tai Lung has broken out of prison! He's on his way! (pause)
Oogway That is bad news. If you do not believe that the Dragon Warrior can stop him.
Sorry, Dad.
"Sorry" doesn't make the noodles, son.
Oogway [walking towards Po]
I see you have found the Sacred Peach Tree of Heavenly Wisdom!
[Po turns around with a lot of peaches stuffed in his mouth]
Oh! Is that what this is? I'm so sorry! I just thought it was a regular peach tree!
You did? (Po nods and smiles.) Wow...It is just as Oogway...foretold... You are the Dragon Warrior. You have brought peace... to this valley... And... and to me... Thank you... Thank you... Po... Thank you... Thank you... [Slowly lays his head down, as if dead]
No! Master! No, no, no! Don't die Shifu! Please!
Shifu (angrily): I'm not dying, you idiot! - Er, I mean, Dragon Warrior... I am simply at peace... Finally.
[Final Lines of the Movie, to Shifu, who is resting after his battle with Tai Lung]
...Wanna get something to eat?
When you focus on kung fu, when you concentrate... you stink. [Po frowns] But perhaps that is my fault. I cannot train you the way I have trained the Five. I now see that the way to get through to you is with this. [pulls out a bowl of dumplings]
Oh great, 'cause I am hungry!
But a peach cannot defeat Tai Lung!
Oogway Maybe it can. If you are willing to guide it, to nurture it, to believe in it.
But how? How?! I need your help, Master.
Oogway No. You just need to believe. Promise me Shifu. Promise me you will believe.
I...I will...try.
Oogway Good. (Looks around at the peach tree petals floating around him.) My time has come. (Hands Shifu his staff.) You must continue your journey, without me.
Oogway [to Shifu]
I have had a vision: Tai Lung will return.
But who? Who is worthy to be trusted with the secret to limitless power? To become...the Dragon Warrior?
Oogway [shrugs]
I don't know.
