Michelle Unwin Oi. What have I said to you about speaking to Dean like that?
Played by Samantha Womack 
Kingsman: The Secret Service (2015) · 34 quotes
Kingsman: The Secret Service (2015) · 34 quotes
3rd most-quoted character in Kingsman: The Secret Service (2015): in 7 of its 34 quotes
Most scenes with: Gary "Eggsy" Unwin (4), Dean (4)
I don't want your help, I want my husband back!
More lines from Michelle Unwin
2 quotes Michelle Unwin Michelle Unwin Just leave him alone, Dean! Eggsy, go. Please just go, babe.
Scenes with Michelle Unwin
4 scenes Michelle Unwin Eggsy? Eggsy, come here. Got any Rizla, babe?
No.
Why'd you do your mum a favour, go down to the shop and get some.
Get 'em yourself.
Michelle Unwin [Looks up at Eggsy sternly]
Oi. What have I said to you about speaking to Dean like that?
Three's a crowd, isn't it? Why don't Dean's poodle go?
I'll tell you what. [Dean takes some cash out of his pocket and hands it to Eggsy] Why don't you take this, go and get some Rizla's, get yourself some sweets. And while you're gone, we'll show your mum how three can be good company.
Michelle Unwin [Eggsy takes the cash from Dean]
Thanks, babe.
Michelle Unwin [Eggsy returns home after watching the fight between Harry and Dean's thugs in the pub. Michelle turns to see Eggsy, then turns back to look at Dean before getting up from the couch to warn Eggsy about Dean]
Eggsy. Just go please, because he's going to...
Michelle Unwin [Dean gets up from the couch and suddenly jabs Eggsy against the fridge and then lands a punch on Eggsy's stomach, causing Eggsy to groan in pain] [Places her hands on Dean's shoulder]
No, please! Don't hurt him! [Dean turns his attention away from Eggsy towards Michelle and grabs Michelle by the throat]
**** off! [Dean pushes Michelle away] Get the **** away! Shut the **** up! [Dean turns his attention back to Eggsy] Who was with you in that **** pub? I want to know the name of the geezer you was with!
I wasn't with no one!
I don't know what you're on about.
I don't know who you're **** on about!
**** tell me his name!
I don't know who you're **** on about!
[As the struggle between Eggsy and Dean continues, Harry overhears it through a mic that he placed on Eggsy's shoulder]
You listen to me! I want to know who was with you in that pub. Do you understand? I want to know his **** name! Because, I swear, I'll rip your mouth! [Slaps Eggsy again as Harry hears] Tell me!
I don't know who you're **** on about!
Tell me!
Michelle Unwin Just tell him, Eggsy!
[Dean picks up a meat cleaver and shoves it in Michelle's face]
**** off! **** off, Michelle! [Dean threatens Eggsy with the meat cleaver] I could kill you right now and no one in the whole world will notice!
But I would. I have enough evidence on your activities to have you locked up for the rest of your life, Mr Dean Anthony Baker.
What the ****?
So I suggest you leave the boy alone, or I shall be forced to deliver it to the appropriate authorities. [Dean puts the meat cleaver down]
Eggsy, meet me at the tailor I told you about.
What the ****'s going on here?
Michelle Unwin [Hugs Eggsy]
Where have you been? I've been so worried about you!
[Eggsy's smile fades when he sees a black eye on Michelle's face] [Referring to Dean]
Where is he?
Michelle Unwin I'm fine. Eggsy, please, please, just don't get involved.
No, I should've never left you on your own. This stops right now. I'll be right back.
Michelle Unwin Eggsy...
Oh, Mugsy. So you're back. What, you've gone and nicked a **** taxi now?
Yeah. Can I have a word about my mum's black eye?
You want to have a word with me? You get out of that cab, I'll knock you straight back down on your **** arse.
Tell your muppets to go inside, then I'll get out.
I know this bloke who's taken over a tailor shop on Saville Row. It's given me a job, Mum. Comes with a lot of perks. Including a house. Come and live with me there, Mum. Come on.
[Michelle starts to stand up, but Dean suddenly grits his teeth and points a finger at Michelle]
Sit down, you.
[Dean, Rottweiler and the other thugs gets up from different tables]
Only place she'll be visiting is you in **** hospital. Do you hear?
Michelle Unwin Just leave him alone, Dean! Eggsy, go. Please, just go, babe.
Alright.
[He turns to walk away]
Yeah, that's it, do as Mummy says! Why don't you ask that tailor friend of yours to knock up a nice chicken costume? It'll suit you, mug!
Man
[Eggsy locks the pub's doors methodically, in perfect imitation of Harry. One of the men who was in the pub last time quietly speaks to Dean.]
Hey-
Shut the **** up. Eggsy, I'm going to shove your manners up your ****-
[Eggsy turns, sweeping his umbrella handle to catch the glass sitting on a nearby counter, and flings it at Dean, knocking him out.] [with a cunning grin]
So, are we going to stand here all day, or are we going to fight?
