Preston quotes from King Kong (2005)

What location, Carl?! You're supposed to be shooting on the back lot!

Carl Denham

Yes, I understand that. But fellas, we're not making that film anymore. Things have changed. The script has been rewritten. Life... intervened. I've come into possession of a map. The sole surviving record of an uncharted island-- thought to exist only in myth! Until now...

Whoa. Carl. Slow down.

Is he asking for more money?

He's asking us to fund a wild goose chase.

Carl Denham

I'm talking about a primative world... never before seen by man. That's where I'll shoot my picture.

Will there be boobies?

Carl Denham

Boobies?

Jigglies. Jiblonkas. Bazooms. In my experience, people only go to these films to observe the undraped form of the native girls.

Carl Denham

What are you, an idiot? You think they asked DeMill if he would waste his time on nudie shots? NO! They respected the filmmaker! They showed some class! Not that you'd know what that means, you cheap lowlife! God...

Would you step out for a moment, Carl?
[Carl leaves the room and points to a glass of water] Gimme that!

Preston

You won't like it. It's non-alcoholic.

Carl Denham

Preston, you have a lot to learn about the motion picture business. [he presses the glass against the door and listens intently]

Don't get me wrong. Carl Denham's made some interesting pictures. He's had a lot of... near success.

He's a preening self promoter. Washed up, no talent. The guy's got 'loser' written all over him.

Look, I know his project isn't working out as well as we planned, but--

This jumped up little turd's gonna bankrupt us!

The animal footage has value.

Sure. Universal are desperate for stock footage.

Then sell it! Scrap the picture!

Get him back in.

Mr... Denham? [Carl and Preston have dissapeared from the waiting room]

What location, Carl?! You're supposed to be shooting on the back lot!

Carl Denham

Yes, I understand that, but fellas, we're not making that film anymore. And I'll tell you why. The story has changed. The script has been rewritten. Life... intervened. I've come into possession of a map. The sole surviving record of an uncharted island. A place that was thought to exist only in myth. Until now...

Whoa, Carl, slow down.

Is he asking for more money?

He's asking us to fund a wild goose chase.

Carl Denham

Where we're going is the only place on Earth where the geese chase us! I'm talking about a primitive world, never before seen by man. The ruins of an entire civilization. The most spectacular thing you've ever seen. That's where I'll shoot my picture. [After a moment's silence] So, any questions?

Will there be action?

Carl Denham

Yes.

Will there be mystery and drama?

Carl Denham

Yes.

Will there be romance?

Carl Denham

Yes.

Will there be danger, terror and suspense?

Carl Denham

Yes!

Will the island natives be friendly or hostile?

Carl Denham

Well, that depends.

Depends on what?

Carl Denham

Which side they're on, and whether or not they might turn out to be bloodthirsty savages. [after a long pause] Any other questions?

Are you sure this new picture will make a lot of money at the box office?

Carl Denham

Yes! Now, if there's nothing else...

Just one more question, if you don't mind my asking?

Carl Denham

Go ahead.

Will there be breasts?

Carl Denham

Breasts?!

You know what I mean! Jigglies. Jiblonkas. Bazooms. You see, in my experience, people only go to these films to observe the undressed form of the native girls.

Carl Denham

What are you, an idiot? You think they asked DeMille if he would waste his time on nude shots? No! They respected the filmmaker! They showed some class! Not that you'd know what that means, you cheap lowlife! [Zelman gives the thuggish studio guy an angry look] Is there anything I can do to make it up to you guys?

Actually, there is. Would you step outside for a moment, Carl?

Carl Denham

Gimme that!

Preston

You won't like it. It's non-alcoholic.

Carl Denham

Preston, you have a lot to learn about the motion picture business. [he presses the glass against the door and listens intently]

Don't write him off, fellas. He's hot-headed, sure. But up to now, Carl Denham's made some interesting pictures; he's had a lot of... near success.

He's a preening self-promoter... an ambitious no-talent! The guy has "loser" written all over him.

Look, I understand your disappointment –

He's washed up. It's all over town!

He can't direct. He doesn't have the smarts.

This jumped-up little jerk's gonna bankrupt us!

The animal footage has value?

Sure! Universal is desperate for stock footage!

Then sell it! Scrap the picture! We gotta retrieve something from this debacle.

Get him back in.
Zelman's Assistant: Mister... Denham?
[Carl and Preston have disappeared from the waiting room]

Carl Denham

Fay's a size four.

Preston

Yes, she is, but she's doing a picture with RKO.

Carl Denham

Cooper, huh? I might've known.

Mr. Hayes

If someone were to tell you this ship was headed for Singapore, what would you say?

Lumpy

I would say they're full of it, Mr. Hayes. We turned southwest last night.

Carl Denham

Gentlemen, please. We're not looking for trouble, if that's what you two are worried about.

Jimmy

No. You're looking for something else.

Carl Denham

Yes, we are. We're going to find Skull Island. Find it, film it, show it to the world. For about 25 cents, you get to see the last blank space on the map.

Lumpy

I wouldn't be so sure of that.

Preston

What do you mean? Is there something you're not telling us?

Lumpy

Seven years ago, me and Mr. Hayes were working our passage... on a Norwegian schooner.

Mr. Hayes

We picked up a castaway. We found him in the water. He'd been drifting for days.

Lumpy

His ship had run aground on an island way west of Sumatra. An island hidden in fog. He spoke of a huge wall... built so long ago... that no one knew who'd made it. A wall over 200 feet high... as strong today as it was ages ago.

Preston

Why did they build the wall?

Lumpy

Does the name "Kong" mean anything to you?

Carl Denham

Oh, come on, guys! That's nothing but a native superstition! A legend! A myth!

Lumpy

Even legends, or myths, have a basis of truth. [After a moment's silence] Believe what you want. But the castaway, he spoke of a creature... neither beast nor man, but something monstrous, living behind that wall.

Carl Denham

A lion, a tiger... or a bear, perhaps. A man-eater. That's how all these stories start.

Preston

What else did he say?

Lumpy

Nothing. When we found him the next morning, he'd stuck a knife through his heart.

Carl Denham

Mmm-hmm. Sorry, fellas, but you'll have to do better than that. Monsters belong in B-movies.

Mr. Hayes

Even if you find this place, even if you go ashore with your friends and your cameras, you won't come back alive. Just as long as you understand that.

Carl Denham

Please remain calm, ladies and gentlemen! We now come to the climax of this savage ritual. The sacrifice of a beautiful young girl. Behold her terror as she is offered to the mighty Kong! Give a big hand, folks, for the bravest girl I have ever met; Ms. Ann Darrow!

Save me from the beast! [Kong roars in rage. Everyone in the auditorium gasps in shock.] No! no!! Help me! No!!

Jack

Where is she?? Where's Ann?

Preston

I have no idea. I heard he offered her all kinds of money and she turned him down flat.
[Scene switches, revealing that the real Ann is in another theater nearby, practicing a dance number]

Carl Denham

Here's your story, boys! "Beauty... and the man who saved her from the beast!" Take the pictures.

Jack

Oh no... [Kong begins to roar louder and thrashes around on the stage, still chained up.] We have to get these people out of here. [to the audience] Everyone needs to leave! Okay? He thinks that girl is a fake! Come on!

Bruce Baxter

Denham, for once in your life, could you please tell that great big ape to be quiet?

Carl Denham

Let him roar! It makes a swell picture. [Laughs]

Jack

Head for the exits!

Get your own seat, buddy! You're not having mine.

Bruce Baxter

Excuse me, fellas. Coming through! Coming through, fellas!

Somebody!! SOMEBODY HELP ME!!!

Preston

GO! GO! GET OUT!!!

Jack

Go! Go now!