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Honeymoon in Vegas

Honeymoon in Vegas quotes

8 total quotes

Jack Singer
Roy Bacon


View Quote Jack Singer: Betsy, hi, so what's the story?
Betsy: I have to pack.
Jack Singer: We can leave! What did you work out?
Betsy: Um, he's taking me to Hawaii. It's only for a few days.
Jack Singer: Come on. You're so like blithe about this all of a sudden, like you don't give a damn.
Betsy: Of course I give a damn but this was not my idea okay, Jack? Poker was not my idea.
Jack Singer: Would you please stop crucifying me with this?
Betsy: Where's my bag?
Jack Singer: He's going to jump all over you the second he gets there.
Betsy: I won't let him. Oh please, Jack, give me a little credit.
Jack Singer: He'll overcome you. What happens if you start screaming? It's like a jungle over there. He probably has servants and bodyguards and believe me they will drug you.
Betsy: His son is going to be there, Jack. His granddaughter Tiffany will be there.
Jack Singer: She knows the kid's name already. Listen, you'll be back Monday?
Betsy: I don't know. Probably Tuesday or Wednesday.
Jack Singer: Tuesday or Wednesday? That's almost a week!
Betsy: What, you expect us to fly back and forth to Hawaii in 2 days?
Jack Singer: Us? Already it's us.
Betsy: Oh don't be infantile. I'm trying to make the best of this.
View Quote Jack Singer: Do you know what a straight flush is? It's like... unbeatable.
Betsy: "Like unbeatable" is not unbeatable.
Jack Singer: Hey, I know that now, okay.
View Quote Jack Singer: I dreamt about my mother again last night.
Betsy: Was she vacuuming naked?
Jack Singer: No. She opened her eyes and I said, 'Mom, I'm gonna marry that girl,' and she smiled.
Betsy: Really?
Jack Singer: Yeah. Of course she was naked.
View Quote Mahi Mahi: Chief Orman have pretty big influence around here.
Jack Singer: Influence? He lives in a SHACK!
View Quote Mahi Mahi: My name Mahi. Mahi Mahi.
Jack Singer: Like the fish?
Mahi Mahi: Yeah. My father was a fisherman.
Jack Singer: My father left home when I was 5. That's why I'm named Jack, as in, "Jack tell your mother I'm just going out to get the paper."
View Quote Ticket agent: Please, sir, if you don't get back in line...
Jack Singer: Then, what? I'll be arrested? Put in airport jail?!
View Quote People get married and then they do the most hideous, unbelievable things to each other.
View Quote We're the Flying Elvises. Utah chapter.