Kevin McCallister [The house is awash in water]
House, clean yourself up. [nothing happens] Well, it was worth a try.
Played by Mike Weinberg 
Home Alone 4 (2002) · 23 quotes
Home Alone 4 (2002) · 23 quotes
Most-quoted character in Home Alone 4 (2002): in 15 of its 23 quotes
Most scenes with: Prescott (5), Peter (4), Natalie (4)
I knew this was gonna be the best Christmas ever.
More lines from Kevin McCallister
6 quotes Kevin McCallister Kevin McCallister Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night.
Kevin McCallister Mr. Prescott!
Kevin McCallister Good idea.
Kevin McCallister Around the back!
Kevin McCallister Yes!
Scenes with Kevin McCallister
8 scenes Kevin Robbers were trying to rip off your house!
So you chose to trash it?
Kevin No, I was trying to protect it!
By trashing it?
Marv, I gotta pee.
Vera, you can pee next week.
[Vera and Marv enter Kevin's room, which appears deserted] [whispering]
I think there's somebody here.
No, not now. Shhhh.
You shhhhhhhh.
SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
Kevin [Kevin is trapped in the basement with Mr. Prescott]
I don't understand. If they were so mean to you how come you never quit working for them?
I know you are young and that is the most obvious solution, but jobs are not always easy to find.
Dad
Just because you grow up on the outside doesn't mean you want to stop having fun enjoying life.
Kevin I know all about the inner child dad.
You do, huh?
Kevin That's why old guys drive sports cars.
You're probably right.
Kevin But the trouble with sports cars, there's no room for anybody else maybe one other person max. But if you want to take a real road trip luggage and all you don’t even have room for a friend I mean there cool and fast and all but who wants to be in a nice car when you're alone all.
Kevin, what happened?
Kevin It wasn't me. It was the burglars.
The burglars?
Kevin Yeah, and I recognized the one guy, Marv. Did I ever tell you about him? Well, that's another story. But the point is, they were gonna rip off your house!
So you chose instead to trash it?
Kevin No, I was trying to protect it!
By trashing it?
What in the name of...?
Kevin Hey, why didn't you come when I was calling you?
Prescott, were you aware of any burglars here today?
Burglars? No, ma'am. All the alarms were on as usual.
Kevin Well, maybe they turned them off. They had one of these, you know.
I saw no intruders, and except for... beg your pardon, ma'am, the briefest of all bathroom breaks, my eyes were on the monitors at all times. How one child could do so much damage in the time it took me to... Well, it's quite beyond me.
Kevin It wasn't me!
Well, there was no one else here!
Kevin He's lying!?
I am not!
Kevin Are too!
Am not!
Kevin Are too!
With all due respect, sir, I did see Master Kevin playing with the devices as if the house were a big toy. The only hooligan here today was your son.
Can you read? The door. "No Entry."
Kevin What, does that mean me?
Especially you. This is the control center from which I manage this entire household, as well as my personal quarters. Miss Natalie may have granted you run of her home, but this is my domain and strictly off-limits. Understood? Any more questions? Good.
Kevin I'm not lying. The bad guys are back.
We're not getting anywhere.
Kevin, I spoke to all the caterers and to Molly. Nobody saw a thing but you. Now, how could that be?
Kevin I don't know. But I heard they're gonna kidnap the prince.
You heard them say that?
Kevin Yeah, with my Super Spy bugging device. And Prescott's involved with the whole thing.
This is absurd. I'm going to call and make sure the royal family's flight is okay for tomorrow.
Kevin, I know what's going on here.
Kevin You do?
Yeah. You're out to destroy my relationship with Natalie.
Kevin What?
You knew how important tonight was to her, and you went and pulled a crazy stunt like this.
Kevin That's not the truth.
I've given you a lot of leeway because I know how tough this divorce has been on you. But tonight you went way too far. I want you to go to your room and think about what you've done. And when you're ready to apologize to Natalie, then we'll talk.
What are you doing here? Tell me.
Kevin I, uh, I... Nothing. I swear. I thought all of this was cool. I wanted to take a look at it.
You don't go to other people's homes uninvited, and you don't touch their things. Didn't I warn you what would happen if I ever caught you in here again?
Kevin Not specifically.
Trust me. It won't be pleasant. What do you want?
I thought I heard the boy. Ah! And indeed I did. I don't want him bothering you anymore, so I'll just get him out of your way. Come along, Kevin. He'll be my responsibility from now on.
Kevin Bar, revolve sesame.
Kevin Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night.
Good night. (Mr. Prescott hits her with a tray and she falls down) Aaaaaahhh!
Kevin [gasps]
Mr. Prescott!
Kevin Boy, am I glad to see you.
Perhaps we should call the police.
Kevin Good idea, Mr. Prescott.
Just "Prescott" to you.
Kevin "Prescott"!
Oh, come on. No, prison's not so bad.
Oh yeah?
Yeah, on Thursdays, you get Salisbury steak.
Yeah, I know about prison. That's where I met you.
Calm down. Calm down.
You calm down!?
Officer
Yeah.
Hey, don't touch me!
Peter, what's he done now?!
Well, he saved the day, that's what. You should be thanking him.
Molly?! What in the world is going on?!
Detective
It seems that they were gonna kidnap the prince. Best we can gather, she's the boss.
Kevin Well, looks like you're gonna have to find a new maid.
And a new butler, I'm afraid. I resign.
Resign?! But why?!
Because as a wise young man once said, "Life's too short."