Tied for 3rd most-quoted character in Hellboy II: The Golden Army (2008): in 6 of its 51 quotes
Most scenes with: Abe (5), Krauss (4), Prince Nuada (2)
And what about, what about this guy? Walking around with a toilet seat on his head.
A toilet seat!
Hey, I think we gotta lose the garbage truck. Sends out the wrong signal. [Laughs at television]
Oh, you think that's our problem? Transportation? Hah.
To wage his war, my brother needs this. [Holding the crown piece and cylinder] The final piece of the crown of BethMora and this map to the location of the Golden Army chamber.
The Golden Army. The harbingers of death, the unstoppable tide–
Howdy Doody.
Your Highness, if you hand the crown piece over to us–
No. Where it goes, I go. My father died to uphold the truce with your world. We must honor his noble intentions.
The lady is in dire danger.
I take is your are vouching for her, Agent Sapien?
Most emphatically, yes.
Even so– I am sorry, but we simply cannot assume such responsibility on our own.
Lady just lost her father, what more do you want?
You may not care, but there are procedures, rules, and little handbooks that–
She's coming with us. You got that, gasbag?
Yeah, right. You take checks?
Demon. Born from a womb of shadows, sent to destroy their world, and you still believe you belong?
Are we going to talk all night? Because I'm really sleepy.
Gute nacht, Agent Hellboy. [Hellboy gives him an annoyed look] Look, Agent, I know you don't like me, but I could take away your badge.
Never had one. Kept asking, though.
You will learn to obey me, follow protocol and stay fockused at all times!
Oh, that word – "fock-yused"? Yeah, with your accent, I wouldn't use it that much.
I knew Professor Broom, young man.
You didn't know Professor Broom.
Yes, I did!
Shut up.
After my accident–
Shut up!
...he designed this containment suit. A wonderful man. And even then he was worried about your future. He–
Hey, gasbag, stop it! Right now.
Or what? Are you threatening me? Because I think I can take you.
Excuse me?
You heard me.
I couldn't hear you from all the way over there.
I can take you. Because you have one fatal flaw.
Oh, I wanna hear it.
Try me.
WHAT'S MY FLAW?!
Your temper! It gets the best of you. Makes you weak, makes you vulnerable–
Oh, crap– Johann? Johann? Johann? Hey, Johann? [Glances around uneasily] C'mon, pal, hang in there, will ya? Johann? Johann! [Giving up, he leans against the lockers] ...Damn. [sips from a can of beer; suddenly, a locker door slams into his face] –Ow.
There we are. Your temper – it makes you sloppy. Try to control it, Agent Hellboy, before it controls you. [Walks away, singing to himself in German]
Glasshole.
Oh, hello, Red. Well, you're up late.
What are you listening to?
Oh, uh, Vivaldi. Il cimento dell'armonia. I particularly like the last–
Hey, hey. What's that? [Referring to the item in Abe's hand]
Um, just a remote. [Hellboy gestures at the hand behind Abe's back] Oh, uh– [Reveals a CD] this? Yes, um–
–"Popular Love Songs." Wh–? [takes a moment to realize] Oh, Abe. You fell for the Princess?
You need to get out more.
She's alone in the world. I wanna help her. I need to care for her.
You're in love. Have a beer.
Oh, my body's a temple.
Well, now it's an amusement park.
No, no, no. The glandular balance of–
Just shut up and drink it, would you? [Abe sighs and takes the beer] What track?
Eight.
"Can't– Smile– Without You."
I know.
Yep, I'm gonna need a beer, too.
Well, see, I love this song. And I can't smile– or cry. I think I have no tear ducts. [Presses a button on the remote and "Can't Smile Without You" begins to play on the stereo]
I wish Father were here. He'd know what to tell you– us.
You know I can't smile without you.
I can't smile without you. I can't laugh and I can't sing. I'm finding it hard to do anything.
You see, I feel sad when you're sad.
Woooo.
I feel glad when you're glad. If you only knew what I'm going through, I just can't smile without you. You came along, just like a song. And brightened my day. Who'd have believed that you were part of a dream?
You're here. So, I assume you brought the remaining piece.
No, we didn't, but we should discuss–
I'm not addressing you, Tin Man. Abraham.
Abraham?
Abe?
As I promised, so.
What the hell are you doing?!
You would do the exact same for Liz.
Agent Sapien, NO!
[Abe throws the crest to Prince Nuada. Prince Nuada catches it.]
What's going on? What's going on?
I quit. [Hands over his belt and weapons]
What? Are you serious?
Looks that way doesn't it? [Gives Manning her belt and weapon]
What's wrong with you? You can't all just quit.
On second thought– [Takes his massive 'Samaritan' revolver] –I think I'll keep this.
Come on. Come on! Johann, they can't do this. Stop them.
Dr. Manning, suck my ectoplasmic schwanzstucker! [Leaves with the others]
