[to a cat]
I should have known that you would be here.... Professor McGonagall.
McGonagall [The cat turns into McGonagall.] [tearfully]
Good evening, Professor Dumbledore. Are the rumours true, Albus?
I'm afraid so, Professor. The good and the bad.
McGonagall And the boy?
McGonagall Do you think it wise to trust Hagrid with something as important as this?
Ah, Professor. I would trust Hagrid with my life.
[Hagrid appears on a flying motorcycle]
Professor Dumbledore, sir. Professor McGonagall.
No problems, I trust, Hagrid?
No, sir. Little tyke fell asleep just as we were flying over Bristol. [hands Dumbledore a bundle – Harry] Try not to wake him. There you go.
McGonagall [Dumbledore takes Harry and heads for the Dursleys]
Albus, do you really think it's safe, leaving him with these people? I have watched them all day, they're the worst sort of... Muggles imaginable. They really are–
McGonagall This boy will be famous! There won't be a child in our world that doesn't know his name!
Exactly. He's far better off growing up away from all of that... until he is ready. [Dumbledore places Harry on the doorstep. Hagrid snivels.] There, there, Hagrid. It's not really goodbye, after all. [Hagrid nods. Dumbledore places a letter on Harry.] Good luck, Harry Potter.
McGonagall [holding a list of names]
When I call your name, you will come forth. I shall place the Sorting Hat on your head… [holds up the Sorting Hat] and you will be sorted into your houses. [looks over the list] Hermione Granger.
[sighs; walks up, nervously]
Oh, no. [calmly to herself] Okay, relax.
[to Harry]
Mental, that one. I'm tellin' ya.
SH Sorting Hat
[Hermione sits on the stool and McGonagall places the Sorting Hat on her head as a face appears]
Ah, right, then. Hmm. Right. Okay… Gryffindor!
McGonagall [The Gryffindor students clap and cheer and Hermione joyfully joins them at their table]
Draco Malfoy. [Draco comes up sits on the stool; places the hat on his head]
SH Sorting Hat
Slytherin!
[Draco gets up from the stool and is sorted into the Slytherin House table as the students cheer] [whispering to Harry]
There's not a witch or wizard who went bad who wasn't in Slytherin.
McGonagall Susan Bones.
[As Susan walks up to the Sorting Hat, Harry looks around and notices a pale man named, Severus Snape, giving him some sinister looks] [as Harry puts his hand on his scar in pain; concerned]
Harry, what is it?
Nothing. Nothing, I'm fine.
SH Sorting Hat
Let's see. I know… Hufflepuff!
McGonagall [takes the hat off Susan's head as she's sorted into Hufflepuff House, then looks over the list]
Ronald Weasley.
SH Sorting Hat
[Ron nervously walks up and sits down on the stool as the hat is placed on his head]
Ha! Another Weasley. I know just what to do with you. Gryffindor!
McGonagall [Ron sighs in relief and joins the Gryffindor table as the students cheer]
Harry Potter. [Harry walks up and sits down on the stool; places the hat on his head]
SH Sorting Hat
Hmm, difficult, very difficult. Plenty of courage, I see. Not a bad mind, either. There's talent, oh, yes. And a thirst to prove yourself. But where to put you?
[whispering and begging]
Not Slytherin. Not Slytherin.
SH Sorting Hat
Not Slytherin, eh? Are you sure? You could be great, you know. It's all here, in your head. And Slytherin will help you on the way to greatness! There's no doubt about that. No?
[still whispering]
Please, not Slytherin, anything but Slytherin.
SH Sorting Hat
Well, if you're sure. Better be… GRYFFINDOR!
[Harry smiles proudly and joins the Gryffindor table as Ron, Hermione, and the other students clap and cheer immensely]
[That Halloween night, the great hall has floating Jack O'Lanterns in place of the candles. Harry notices an empty spot on the bench.]
Where's Hermione?
N Neville
Parvati Patil said that she wouldn't come out of the girls’ bathroom. She said that she'd been in there all afternoon, cryin’.
Q Quirrell
[Harry glances at Ron with a disapproving look on his face; Ron shrugs. Suddenly, Professor Quirrell comes running into the Great Hall in panic.]
TROLL! IN THE DUNGEON! T-TROOLLL IN THE DUNGEON! [Dumbledore rises from his seat in concern. Everyone looks at Quirrell and he stops and there is utter silence.] Thought you ought to know.
[Quirrell passes out in fear. The great hall goes silent, and then everyone freaks out, screaming and running.]
SILLLLLEEENNNNCEEEEE! [Everyone stops and calms down; quieter now] Everyone will please not panic! Now, prefects will lead their house back to the dormitories. Teachers will follow me to the dungeons.
HP Hufflepuff Prefect
Hufflepuff, this way!
P Percy
[Snape looks aghast, and he walks out through a doorway. A bit later, Percy is leading the Gryffindors down a dark corridor.]
Gryffindors, keep up, please, and stay alert!
How could a troll get in?
Not on its own. Trolls are really stupid. Probably people playing jokes. [Suddenly, Harry stops and pulls Ron aside.] What?
Hermione! She doesn't know!
[The two separate themselves from the crowd. They run down corridors. They start running down a hall when they stop, seeing a towering shadow on the wall.]
I think the troll's left the dungeon!
[A deep grunting is heard. Harry pulls Ron into a doorway, they peer out to see the large troll lumbering by into a room, dragging a club behind it.]
It's going into the girls’ bathroom!
[In the girls’ bathroom, Hermione emerges from a stall, wiping her eyes. She stops when she sees something. The troll is standing there. Hermione backs up into the stall just as the troll raises its club and smashes the top part of the stalls. Hermione screams in terror. Harry and Ron come bursting in.]
Hermione, move!
[The troll smashes the remaining stalls.]
HELP! HELP! [Harry and Ron start throwing wood pieces at the troll.]
HEY, PEA-BRAIN! [Ron throws wood and hits the troll on the head, drawing its attention. Hermione escapes from the stalls to under a sink, but the troll sees her and swings its club again, smashing the sink and barely missing her. Harry cringes.]
[Harry gets out his wand. He runs forward and grabs the troll's club and is lifted up.]
Whoa! [He lands on the troll's shoulders and is hurled around back and forth.]
[Harry's wand sticks up the troll's nose. The troll groans in disgust.]
Ew!
[Ron and Hermione both look disgusted. The troll snorts, and whips around.]
Whoa, whoa-whoa!
[The troll gets Harry off its shoulders and is holding him by one leg, upside down.]
Do something!
[The troll swipes at Harry with its club. He pulls himself up, then down.]
What?!
ANYTHING! [the troll swipes at him again] Hurry up!
[Ron grabs his wand. Under the sink, Hermione waves her hand.]
Swish and flick!
[correctly punctuating the words]
Wingardium Leviosa! [Flick! The troll's club is lifted out of its hand and hovers above its head. The troll looks at its empty hand in confusion, then looks up, just as the club comes crashing back down.] Cool. [It hits the troll's head and the troll wavers, then drops Harry, who crawls away, and slowly comes crashing down, knocked out. Hermione approaches carefully.]
I don't think so. Just knocked out. [He grabs his wand which is covered in mucus.] Ugh! Troll bogies.
McGonagall [Harry wipes his wand on his robes. Suddenly, McGonagall, Snape and Quirrell come rushing in. They all gasp at the knocked-out troll.]
Oh! Oh, my goodness! Explain yourselves, both of you!
RA Ron and Harry
Well, what it is...
It's my fault, Professor McGonagall. [The teachers, Ron and Harry look at her.]
McGonagall Miss Granger?
I went looking for the troll. I'd read about them and thought I could handle it. But I was wrong. If Harry and Ron hadn't come and found me, I'd probably be dead.
McGonagall Be that as it may, it was an extremely foolish thing to do. [Harry notices Snape's leg, which has the trousers' leg torn and a large cut on it. Snape notices and covers it up, glaring at Harry.] I would've expected more rational behaviour on your part, and am very disappointed in you, Miss Granger. Five points will be taken from Gryffindor for your serious lack of judgment. [she turns to Harry and Ron] As for you two gentlemen, I just hope you realize how fortunate you are. Not many first-year students could take on a fully grown mountain troll and live to tell the tale. Five points will be awarded to each of you... [Harry and Ron grin at each other] ...for sheer dumb luck!
Q Quirrell
[Snape and McGonagall leave the bathroom]
Perhaps you ought to go. It m-might wake up. Heh. [Harry, Ron and Hermione exit the bathroom. Quirrell looks at the unconscious troll. The troll growls, seemingly about to wake up.] Ahh! Hehe...