Robert 'Bobby' Dupea [to his father]
I don't know if you'd be particularly interested in hearing anything about me. My life, I mean... Most of it doesn't add up to much... that I could relate as a way of life that you'd approve of...I'd like to be able to tell you why, but I don't really...I mean, I move around a lot because things tend to get bad when I stay. And I'm looking...for auspicious beginnings, I guess...I'm trying to, you know, imagine your half of this conversation...My feeling is, that if you could talk, we probably wouldn't be talking. That's pretty much how it got to be before... I left...Are you all right? I don't know what to say...Tita suggested that we try to...I don't know. I think that she...seems to feel we've got...some understanding to reach...She totally denies the fact that we were never that comfortable with each other to begin with...The best that I can do, is apologize. We both know that I was never really that good at it, anyway...I'm sorry it didn't work out.
Dupea I'd like a plain omelette, no potatoes, tomatoes instead, a cup of coffee, and wheat toast.
Waitress No substitutions.
Dupea What do you mean? You don't have any tomatoes?
Waitress Only what's on the menu. You can have a number two - a plain omelette. It comes with cottage fries and rolls.
Dupea Yeah, I know what it comes with. But it's not what I want.
Waitress Well, I'll come back when you make up your mind.
Dupea Wait a minute. I have made up my mind. I'd like a plain omelette, no potatoes on the plate, a cup of coffee, and a side order of wheat toast.
Waitress I'm sorry, we don't have any side orders of toast...an English muffin or a coffee roll.
Dupea What do you mean you don't make side orders of toast? You make sandwiches, don't you?
Waitress Would you like to talk to the manager?
Dupea ...You've got bread and a toaster of some kind?
Waitress I don't make the rules.
Dupea OK, I'll make it as easy for you as I can. I'd like an omelette, plain, and a chicken salad sandwich on wheat toast, no mayonnaise, no butter, no lettuce. And a cup of coffee.
Waitress A number two, chicken sal san, hold the butter, the lettuce and the mayonnaise. And a cup of coffee. Anything else?
Dupea Yeah. Now all you have to do is hold the chicken, bring me the toast, give me a check for the chicken salad sandwich, and you haven't broken any rules.
Waitress You want me to hold the chicken, huh?
Dupea I want you to hold it between your knees.
Waitress Do you see that sign, sir? Yes, you'll all have to leave. I'm not taking any more of your smartness and sarcasm.
Dupea You see this sign? [He sweeps all the water glasses and menus off the table]
Fantastic that you could figure that all out and lie that down on her so you could come up with a way to get your toast. Fantastic!
Dupea Yeah, well, I didn't get it, did I?
No, but it was very clever. I would have just punched her out.
Dupea What else do you do?
Well, there's fishing, boating, and concerts on the mainland. [Laughs] I feel funny telling you this. This is really your home. You probably know better than I what there is to do.
Dupea Nothing.
Dupea Nothing.
Well, it must be very boring for you here.
Dupea That's right.
I find that very hard to comprehend. I don't think I've ever been bored. Excuse me.
Betty That's a wig you wear, isn't it?
Dupea Me?
Betty Yeah, I told her it was you but that you were wearin' a wig because on the TV you're mostly all, uh - [pats him on the head] bald up there! [laughs]
Dupea [laughs]
Your, your little friend's real, real sharp. Uh, I don't, uh, I don't wear the wig on TV because if you're gonna be out there in front of two and a half million people, you've got to be sincere. I mean, I like to wear it when I'm in bowling alleys and slipping around, stuff like that. I think it gives me a little class. What do you think?
Bobby I'm sitting here, listening to some cracker asshole who lives in a trailer park compare his life to mine! Keep on telling me about the good life, Elton, because it makes me puke.
Elton If you're sayin' you think you're somethin' better than what I am, now that's somethin' else. But I can't say much of someone who would run off and leave a woman in a situation like this and feel easy about it. And that's all I have to say.
Bobby Well, I'm glad that's all you gotta say, Elton, because I'm about as goddamn tired of your mouth as I am working on this goddamn job.
Elton [Bobby storms off]
Shit ass!
Hey, follow that truck. They know the best places to stop.
Bobby That's an old maid's tale.
Bullshit! Truck drivers are the only ones that know the best places to stop on the road.
Bobby Salesmen and cops are the ones. If you'd ever waitressed, honey, you'd know that.
Don't call me honey, mac.
Bobby Don't call me mac, honey.
I wouldn't be a waitress. They're nasty and full of crap.
You just hold onto your tongue.
Hold on to this. [gestures with her middle finger]
If you think you can talk to me like that --
Bobby Shut up, all of ya!
[to Carl]
I had a baby kitty-cat once. It was a little fluffy thing. Bobby gave it to me. Remember, Bobby? [Samia stops angrily in mid-sentence] The little pussy cat you gave me.
Bobby Yeah.
It had two little white front paws. You know, I was crazy after her. We left her at some friends house and she got squashed flatter than a tortilla right outside their mobile home.
Samia There. Do you see what I mean? The choice of words juxtaposed with the image of a fluffy kitten. The enchantment of words: "squashed," "flat" et cetera, et cetera.
Samia Perhaps, but it was just what I was trying to point out.
Bobby Don't sit there pointing at her.
Samia I beg your pardon.
Bobby I said don't point at her, you creep!
Samia But I was just telling about the—
Bobby Where the hell do you get the ass to tell anybody anything about class or who the hell's got it or what she typifies? You shouldn't even be in the same room with her, you pompous celibate!
Samia Carl, this is really too much.
Carl Just calm down now, Bobby.
Bobby You're totally full of shit. You're all full of shit!
