N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z #

Father of the Bride

Father of the Bride quotes

34 total quotes

George Banks

View Quote George: My first move was to get the old tuxedo out of mothballs. [loking in mirror] Hey, lookin' good, my man! Git down! Hey! [singing] What's new pussycat...whoa-a-whoa-whoa...What's new pussycat...whoa-a-whoa-whoa...
Nina: George? Annie, he's up here!
George: Hey...Pussycat, pussycat, I love you...Indeed I do...Yes I do! Hey, what do you think? Bought it in '75 and it still fits.
Annie: Like a glove.
Nina:'s just a...way to go. Maybe...maybe you could get a new tux. We're all wearing new clothes and...
George: What? Don't you think I look cute? I mean, there will be a lot of single gals there.
View Quote George: The reason I'm asking all these questions is I have a great idea where we can have this lovely, not small, but not too big wedding.
Nina: You do? Where?
George: At our favorite restaurant. The place we've been eating at for fifteen years. The best. The Steak Pit!
Annie: Dad, get serious.
Matt: I don't think you want the word "Pit" on a wedding invitation, George.
Annie: Really, Dad. A rib joint with sawdust on the floor isn't exactly what I had in mind for my wedding. No offense.
View Quote George: Two hundred and fifty dollars a head means that for the four of us to attend this wedding in our own home will cost one thousand dollars. Therefore, we are not getting up from this table until we cut this list down to the bare minimum. Now, invite as many people as you want to the church. Pack 'em in. Build a grandstand if you want, but we are not having more than one hundred and fifty people in this house on the day of the wedding. All right, let's start eliminating.
Nina: Okay. Jim Pepper and wife.
George: Oh, great. Start with one of my guys.
Nina: Fine! We'll start with one of mine. I'll cut Steve and Stephanie Turell. They're very good clients of mine...
George: Say no more, they're history.
Nina: All right. Jim Pepper and wife.
George: I've known the guy for twenty years.
Nina: You haven't seen him in fifteen, George.
George: All right. I'll say I lost his address. Now here's somebody. Your cousin Betsy. The poet/waitress/picture framer.
Nina: We can't cut family. They know about the wedding.
Matt: I only invited one person: Cameron. Mom said I could have a friend there.
George: For two hundred and fifty bucks you can see Cameron after the wedding. All right, very good. Five down. We're rolling.
Nina: All right, what about Harry Kirby? We haven't seen him in ages.
George: I don't know.
Annie: Didn't Harry Kirby die last year?
George: Yes! Good! Oh, well...sorry.
Matt: Who's Frank Eglehoffer?
George: What?
Nina: He's coordinating the wedding and then we're not going to invite him?
George: Exactly! Do you think I'm going to pay a guy fifteen-percent, plus an hourly, plus an additional five hundred dollars to feed him and that assistant of his? Have you lost your mind?
Matt: Can I put Cameron back on the list if he promises not to eat?
George: You know, that's not a bad idea. Who else can we ask not to eat? My parents...your mother.
Annie: Why don't we just charge people? That way we can make money on the wedding! [storms out]
Nina: Annie? Annie...
George: I was kidding.
View Quote John: How did you...uh...take the news, George?
George: Me? Uh, truthfully, I was a little surprised.
John: I was shocked.
George: So was I.
John: After all, they'd only known each other a few months.
George: Exactly. And Annie is just finishing up school.
John: Absolutely. Oh, believe me, I tossed and turned over this one, but...the bottom line is, they're in love. They over twenty-one, and whether they're rushing into this or not is maybe not for us to say.
George: [voiceover] Right. Not for us to say. We're only their parents. I was just about to say these very words out loud when he hit me with...
John: Yes, sooner or later you just have to let your kids go and hope you brought 'em up right.
George: [voiceover] This guy was making a little too much sense for me. Suddenly, my shirt collar felt like it was starting to strangle me.
View Quote John: Oh, what a nerve-wracking thing, meeting your future in-laws. What a relief. You two look perfectly normal.
Nina: Oh, well, I am.
View Quote Nina: Ah! I'm going to have to ask you not to talk or I'll have to call Officer whatshisname over there. You've been more than I can handle, George. Annie's wedding is not a conspiracy against you. It's just a wedding. People have them every day in every country in the world. I know it's going to be expensive. But, we don't go to Europe. We don't own fancy cars. I don't own expensive jewelry, so we can afford to have a big wedding.
George: Nina...
Nina: I'll get you out of here on one condition, Banks. That you'll agree to the following. Now repeat after me. "I, George Stanley Banks..."
George: I, George Stanley Banks...
Nina: "...promise to pull it together and act my age."
George: ...promise to pull it together and act my age.
Nina: "I will stop hyperventilating, rolling my eyes, unbuttoning my top collar button..."
George: I don't unbutton my top collar...
Nina: Oh, yeah? No...You mean, like this bit?
George: ...stop hyperventilating, rolling my eyes, and unbuttoning my top collar button.
Nina: "I will stop making faces in general and I will definitely stop telling everybody how much this wedding is costing."
George: I don't tell everyone how much it costs!
Nina: He told you, right?
Officer: Two hundred and fifty a head?
George: Oh, well, thanks!
Nina: "I will try to remember my daughter's feelings and how with every roll of my eyes, I am taking away a piece of her happiness."
George: I love you, Nina.
Nina: Just repeat the last part for me, George.
George: I will try to remember my daughter's feelings and how with every roll of my eyes, I am taking away a piece of her happiness.
Nina: I love you, too. Let's go home.
View Quote Nina: Is something going on?
Annie: Yes, it is, Mom...uh...God, this is a hard thing to tell parents...especially when you're my parents...Oh, God!
George: Honey, just say it. What's the big deal?
Matt: Yeah.
Annie: Okay! I met somebody in Rome. Um, he's an American. Uh, he's from L.A., actually. And um, his name's Brian MacKenzie. And he's this completely wonderful, wonderful, amazing man, and...well, we starting seeing each other, a lot...and, um...we fell in love. Ha! Ha! It actually happened! And, uh, we've decided to get married...which means that, I'm engaged! Ha! I'm engaged! I'm getting married! HA!
Matt: Congratulations!
Annie: Thank you.
Nina: Oh! My! My! Oh, so, oh my...and that's your engagement ring, huh? bought it from said that it's at least a hundred years old...So, Dad. Stop it. Say something.
George: I'm sorry. What did you say?
Young Annie: Dad, I met a man in Rome. And he's wonderful and brilliant, and we're getting married.
Annie: Mom, what's he doing?
Nina: George? George? George? What is it?
George: Well...this is...this is ridiculous! You're too young to get married!
Annie: Too young? Dad, I'm twenty-two. If I'm not mistaken, that's a year older than Mom was when you guys got married.
George: That is absolutely not true!
Nina: Oh,'re absolutely wrong.
George: You were this age when I married you?
Nina: No. I was younger. I was this age when she was born.
George: That...that doesn't matter. Times have changed. Your mother was mature...and twenty-two isn't what it used to be...Matt, would you turn on the air conditioner? It's hot in here. I thought...I thought you didn't believe in marriage. I thought it meant a woman lost her identity. I thought you wanted to get a job before you settled down so you could earn money and be your own person.
Annie: All right, hold on. I didn't think I believed in marriage until I met Brian. Brian's not like any other guy I've ever known. I want to be married to him. And I'm not going to lose my identity with him because he's not some overpowering, macho guy. He's like you, Dad! Except he's brilliant. He happens to love that I'm going to be an architect. He wants me to design a house for us to live in. He said he'd move anywhere I got a job. Give me a little credit, George. I'm not going to marry some ape who wants me to wear go-go boots and an apron. I'm telling you, you'll love him. He's a genius. And sweet. And I love him more than anything in the world.
Nina: What does Brian do?
George: Who's Brian?
Nina: Oh!
George: I forgot his name!
Annie: He's an independent communications consultant.
George: Independent?
Annie: Yes.
George: That's code for unemployed! This is perfect! You meet an unemployed, amazingly brilliant non-ape that I'm going to have to support! I suppose I'm going to have to hire him and fire some hard working guy with three kids because my son-in-law, the "independent communications consultant," can't get a job anywhere else! No wonder he'll move anywhere you get a job! You're not getting married and that's it and that's final! And I don't like you calling me George! I mean, when did this start?
Annie: Daddy, what is wrong with you? [runs out]
George: What? Are you telling me you're happy about this?
Nina: George, please. Would you stop acting like a lunatic father and go out and talk to her before she runs out that door, marries this kid and we never see her again!
George: All right. Kid? How do you know he's a kid? He could be forty-five years old.
View Quote Nina: Why have you been acting so crazy since the moment Annie told you she was getting married?
George: I haven't been acting crazy. I've simply been acting like any normal, red-blooded, American dad.
Nina: Normal? Uh-huh. Okay. Falling into the MacKenzie's pool. Suggesting The Steak Pit as a wedding reception. Oh, watching "America's Most Wanted" every night looking for Brian's face, and now this picnic scenario? George, a wedding is a big deal. Everybody seems to understand this but you.
View Quote Stock boy: Excuse me, sir, but what are you doing?
George: I'll tell you what I'm doing. I want to buy eight hot dogs and eight hot dog buns to go with them. But no one sells eight hot dog buns. They only sell twelve hot dog buns. So I end up paying for four buns I don't need. So I am removing the superfluous buns.
Stock boy: I'm sorry, sir. But you're going to have to pay for all twelve buns. They're not marked individually.
George: Yeah. And you want to know why? Because some big-shot over at the wiener company got together with some big-shot over at the bun company and decided to rip off the American public. Because they think the American public is a bunch of trusting nit-wits who will pay for everything they don't need rather than make a stink!
Manager: Get me security.
George: Well, they're not ripping off this nit-wit anymore because I'm not paying for one more thing I don't need! George Banks is saying no!
Stock boy: Who's George Banks?
George: Me!
Manager: Why don't we just calm down now, sir.
George: I'll tell you why "we" don't calm down, because you're not excited! It takes two people for a "we" to calm down, doesn't it?
Manager: Uh, that I don't know, sir. I'm just the assistant manager of a supermarket. But I'll tell you this. If you don't pipe down and pay for those buns, I'm going to call the police.
George: Oh...right! Yeah! Uh-huh. Yeah. Right!
View Quote I knew I'd never be able to remember what Nina wore that day. But I also knew I'd never forget the way she looked.
View Quote I used to think a wedding was a simple affair. A boy and girl meet, they fall in love, he buys a ring, she buys a dress, they say "I do." I was wrong. That's getting married. A wedding is an entirely different proposition. I know. I've just been through one. Not my own. My daughter's. Annie Banks-MacKenzie. That's her married name. MacKenzie. I'll be honest with you. When I bought this house seventeen years ago, it cost me less than this blessed event in which Annie Banks became Annie Banks-MacKenzie. I'm told that one day I'll look back on all this with great affection and nostalgia. I hope so. You fathers will understand. You have a little girl. An adorable little girl who looks up to you and adores you in a way you could never imagine. I remember how her little hand used to fit inside mine. How she used to sit in my lap and lean her head against my chest. She said that I was her hero. Then the day comes when she wants to get her ears pierced and she wants you to drop her off a block before the movie theater. Next thing you know she's wearing eye shadow and high heels. From that moment on, you're in a constant state of panic. You worry about her going out with the wrong kind of guys, the kind of guys who only want one thing--and you know exactly what that one thing is because it's the same thing you wanted when you were their age. Then she gets a little older and you quit worrying about her meeting the wrong guy and you worry about her meeting the right guy. And that's the biggest fear of all because then you lose her. And before you know it, you're sitting all alone in a big, empty house, wearing rice on your tux, wondering what happened to your life. It was just six months ago that it happened here. Just six months ago that the storm broke.
View Quote I was beginning to feel like I was having an out of body experience. I had to get out of the house, and fast. Nina said as long as I was escaping would I mind escaping to the market and picking up something for dinner. Sure. That was all I needed. A busy supermarket. I needed to drive, mellow out, get my mind off the wedding. But mellowing out was not in the cards.
View Quote I've always been a concerned parent. I'm big on car seats, seat belts, bed times, curfews, calling when you get somewhere, never running with a sharp object. What can I say? I'm a father. Worrying comes with the territory.
View Quote It's funny how empty a house can suddenly get, isn't it?
View Quote Right then I realized, my day had passed. She'll always love me, of course, but not in the same way. I was no longer the man in my little girl's life. I was like an old shoe. The kind we manufacture and get all excited about, then after a few years discontinue. That was me now. Mr. Discontinued.