N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z #


Fargo quotes

61 total quotes

Carl Showalter
Jerry Lundegaard
Marge Gunderson
Multiple Characters
Opening Text
Wade Gustafson

View Quote Mike Yanagita: She fought real hard, Margie
View Quote Mike Yanagita: She had...leukemia
View Quote Mike Yanagita: So ya went and married Norm Son-of-a-Gunderson!
View Quote Mike Yanagita: Well, as an engineer you could do a lot worse
View Quote Mike Yanagita: Well, that's nothing compared to your accomplishments.
View Quote Mike Yanagita: Ya know, it's the Radisson, so it's pretty good.
View Quote Mike Yanagita: You're such a Supa Lady!!
View Quote Scottie Lundegard: There's no ****ing way....
View Quote Shep Proudfoot: [beating Carl violently] ****ing little weasel! **** you! You ****ing mother****er son of a bitch Jesus Christ you ****ing shitbag mother****er!
View Quote Attendant: Hi.
Carl: Yeah, I decided not to park here.
Attendant: What do you mean? You decided not to park here?
Carl: Yeah, I just came in. I decided not to park here.
Attendant: You, uh--I'm sorry, sir, but--
Carl: I decided not to--I'm, uh, not taking the trip as it turns out.
Attendant: I'm sorry, sir, we do have to charge you the four dollars.
Carl: I just pulled in here. I just ****in' pulled in here!
Attendant: Well, see, there's a minimum charge of four dollars. Long-term parking charges by the day.
Carl: I guess you think, ya know, you're some kind of an authority figure. With that stupid ****ing uniform. Huh, buddy? King Clip-on Tie here. Big ****ing man, huh? You know, these are the limits of your life, man. Ruler of your little ****ing gate here. There's your four dollars, you pathetic piece of shit.
View Quote Attendant: May I have your ticket--[He sees Carl's bloody face] Please?
Carl: Open the ****ing gate!
View Quote Carl: [about his face] You should see the other guy. [He sees Jean slumped to the floor, dead] The **** happened to her?
Grimsrud: She started shrieking, ya know.
Carl: Jesus. Oh. Well, I got the money. All of it. All eighty grand. Forty for you, forty for me. That's it, then. Here are the keys to my truck. I'm takin' the Sierra.
Grimsrud: We split that.
Carl: How the **** do ya split a ****in' car, ya dummy? With a ****in' chainsaw?
Grimsrud: One of us pays the other for half.
Carl: Hold on. No ****in' way. You ****in' notice this?! I got ****in' shot. I got ****in' shot in the face! I went and got the ****in' money! I got shot ****in' pickin' it up! I've been up for thirty-six ****in' hours! I'm takin' that ****in' car! That ****er's mine, ya ****in' asshole. Ya know, I've been listenin' to your ****in' bullshit all week. Are we square?! Are we square? Yeah, ya ****in' mute. And if you see your friend Shep Proudfoot, tell him I'm gonna nail his ****in' ass!
View Quote Carl: [after Grimsrud shoots the police officer] Whoa! Whoa, daddy.
Grimsrud: You'll take care of it. You are smooth, smooth, you know. Just clean him of the road.
View Quote Carl: Hey, look at that. Twin Cities. That's the IDS Building, the big glass one. Tallest skyscraper in the Midwest - after the uh, Sears, in, uh, Chicago, or John Han**** Building, whatever. You ever been to Minneapolis?
Grimsrud: Nope.
Carl: Would it kill you to say something?
Grimsrud: I did.
Carl: "No." That's the first thing you've said in the last four hours. That's a, that's a fountain of conversation, man. That's a geyser. I mean, whoa, daddy, stand back, man. Shit. You know I'm sittin' here drivin', doin' all the drivin', man, the whole ****in' way from Brainerd, drivin', just tryin' to chat, you know, keep our spirits up, fight the boredom of the road, and you can't say one ****in' thing just in the way of conversation? Well, **** it. I don't have to talk either, man. See how you like it. [Pause] Just total ****in' silence. Two can play at that game, smart guy. We'll just see how you like it. Total silence.
View Quote Carl: Who the **** are you? Who the **** are you?!
Wade: I've got your damn money now where's my dauguter?
Carl: I am through ****in' around. Drop that ****in' briefcase!
Wade: Where's my daughter?
Carl: **** you man! Where's Jerry? I gave simple ****in' instructions.
Wade: Where's my damn daughter? No Jean, no money!
Carl: Drop that ****ing money!
Wade: No Jean, no money!
Carl: Is this a ****in' joke here?! [Carl pulls out his gun and shoots Wade] Happy now, asshole?! What's with you people?! Ya ****ing imbeciles!
[Wade shoots Carl in the cheek]
Carl: ****in' shot me!