Bela, what's in the needle?
Morphine. With a Demerol chaser.
Ed Wood
Johnny Depp · 39 quotes
Bela Lugosi
Martin Landau · 17 quotes
Mr. Reynolds
Clive Rosengren · 7 quotes
Weiss
Mike Starr · 6 quotes
Criswell
Jeffrey Jones · 5 quotes
Reverend Lemon
G.D. Spradlin · 5 quotes
Bunny Breckinridge
Bill Murray · 4 quotes
Dolores Fuller
Sarah Jessica Parker · 4 quotes
Vampira
Lisa Marie · 3 quotes
Most scenes together: Ed Wood & Bela Lugosi (10), Ed Wood & Mr. Reynolds (7), Ed Wood & Weiss (6)
Ed Wood quotes
Page 2 of 4Boy, Mister Lugosi, you must lead such an exciting life! When is your next picture coming out?
I have no next picture.
You gotta be joking. A big star like you? You must have dozens of 'em lined up.
In the old days, yes. Now, no one gives two ****s for Bela.
Is there a script?
****, no. But there's a poster. [he holds up a movie poster for "I Changed My Sex"]
Listen, I was wondering if you'd like to go out some time. Grab some dinner, maybe.
You mean a date? I thought you were a ****.
No, no. I'm just a transvestite.
Mister Lugosi, why are you buying a coffin?
I'm planning on dying soon.
No!
Yes. I'm embarking on another truck and bus tour of "Dracula". Twelve cities in ten days, if that's concievable.
Mr. Reynolds?
Yes?
We are gonna finish this picture just the way I want it, because you cannot compromise an artist's vision.
But it's our money.
And you're gonna make a bundle, but only if you shut up, and let me do things my way.
Now, what is the one thing, if you put it in a movie, it'll be successful?
Tits.
No, better than that. A star!
Kid, you must have me confused with David Selznick. I don't make major motion pictures, I make crap.
Yes — but if you take that crap and put a star in it, then you've got something!
Yeah. Crap with a star.
Say, Bill, which dress works best for you, the red one or the green one?
Cameraman Which one is the red one?
What do you mean?
Cameraman I mean I can't see the difference. I'm colorblind. But I kinda like the dark gray one.
This is the one. This is the one I'll be remembered for. [at premiere of Plan 9 from Outer Space]
You're the ruler of the universe. Try to show a little taste!
These Baptists are... stupid, stupid, STUPID!
They're driving me crazy! These Baptists are... stupid, stupid, STUPID!
You know, you're, you're much scarier in real life than you are in the movies.
Thank you.
Gregory Walcott
Reverend, I'm here.
Who is he?!
This is our choir director. He's gonna play the young hero.
ARE YOU PEOPLE INSANE?! I'M THE DIRECTOR! I MAKE THE CASTING DECISIONS AROUND HERE!
I thought this was a group effort.
NO!
Minister
Welcome, brother! Do you reject Satan and all his works?
Sure.
[Sputtering, newly baptized Bunny joins Ed at poolside.]
How do you do it? How do you get all your friends to get baptized, just so you can make a monster movie?
It's not a monster movie, it's a supernatural thriller.