Look, I don't have a problem with Sontee. I want to ask her on a date.
Mrs. Wellington Oh, Charles!
Don't "Oh, Charles" me! You were going to have sex on the pool table! You got an 8 ball in your ass!
Down to Earth quotes
Mrs. Wellington 
Mr. King First, you make Frank Sinatra wait for a table...
Keyes He didn't have a jacket.
Mr. King HE'S FRANK SINATA! HE CAN WEAR WHATEVER HE WANTS!
A story of premature reincarnation.
Didn't your momma ever tell you to carry an extra handcuff key?
From now on, we need to make a new slogan. If you get shot in the head, you get a bed. If you head is bloody, we're your buddy.
I had a hard enough time trying to get this girl as a rich white man. Do you know how hard it's going to be to try to get her as a broke black man?
My father's so cheap... that when we went to bed, he'd unplug the alarm clocks. "You can't tell time when you are asleep."
Shut up before I crush you with my wallet!
Tiger Woods, Y'all, Tiger Woods, Y'all! Tiger, Tiger, Tiger, Tiger, Tiger Woods, Y'all!
We're going in there. If you can walk, let's walk. If you can't walk, it's time to roll. If you have crutches, then crutch your ass in there!