Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery quotes

81 total quotes

Austin Powers
Doctor Evil
Multiple Characters

View Quote [Austin is being choked out by Random Task; Vanessa tosses him the penis pump] Honestly...it's not mine...!

View Quote Shall we shag now, or shall we shag later?

View Quote [to Vanessa] I think you're shagedelic, baby! You're switched on! You're smashing! You're a bit of alright!

View Quote Au contraire, baby, you can't resist me.

View Quote Open the frickin' door!

View Quote Computer voice: Evacuation com--
[Austin continues to urinate; stops]
Computer voice: Evacuation com--
[Austin continues urinating; stops again]
Computer voice: Evacuation com--
[Austin continues; then stops]
Computer voice: Com--
[Tinkle]
Computer voice: Com--
[Tinkle]
Computer voice: Com--
[Tinkle]
Computer voice: Com--
[Tinkle]
Computer voice: Com--
[Tinkle; slight pause]
Computer voice: Evacuation com--
[Austin continues urination; Basil looks on bewildered]

View Quote I've been frozen for 30 years. I've got to see if my bits and pieces are still working. [taps crotch] Hello? Are you awake?

View Quote [Entering the Electric Psychedelic Pussycat Swingers' Club] This is my happening and it freaks me out!

View Quote [Filling out a form] Name? Austin Danger Powers. Sex? Yes, please!

View Quote Yeah, baby, yeah!

View Quote It's freedom, baby, yeah!

View Quote Scott Evil: I hate you! I hate you! I wish I was never artificially created in a lab!
Dr. Evil: Oh Scott, that hurts daddy when you say that. Honestly.

View Quote That ain't no woman! It's a man, man!

View Quote Scott Evil: I just think, like, he hates me. I really think he wants to kill me.
Therapist: He doesn't really want to kill you. Sometimes we just say that.
Dr. Evil: No actually the boy is quite astute. I really am trying to kill him, but so far unsuccessfully. He's quite wily, like his old man.

View Quote Vanessa Kensington: Mr. Powers, I would never have sex with you, ever! If you were the last man on earth and I was the last woman on earth, and the future of the human race depended on our having sex, simply for procreation, I still would not have sex with you.
Austin Powers: What's your point, Vanessa?