Countdown Man
[Monotone despite the destruction of Dr. Evil's base around him]
_______ Seconds and counting...
Austin Powers
Mike Myers · 59 quotes
Doctor Evil
Mike Myers · 35 quotes
Vanessa Kensington
Elizabeth Hurley · 11 quotes
Number Two
Robert Wagner · 5 quotes
Alotta Fagina
Fabiana Udenio · 4 quotes
Cowboy
Tom Arnold · 4 quotes
Frau Farbissina
Mindy Sterling · 3 quotes
Scott
Seth Green · 3 quotes
Most scenes together: Austin Powers & Vanessa Kensington (10), Austin Powers & Alotta Fagina (4), Austin Powers & Number Two (3)
Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery quotes
Page 1 of 7[Looking at the man that Austin Powers had drowned and left in the toilet]
Jesus Christ boy! What did you eat?
Send in the femBOTS!
Well my friend Sweet Jay took me to that video arcade in town, right, and they don't speak English there, so Jay got into a fight and he's all, "Hey quit hasslin' me cuz' I don't speak French" or whatever! And then the guy said something in Paris talk, and I'm like, "Just back off!" And they're all, "Get out!" And we're like, "Make me!" It was cool.
Care for some sake?
Sake it to me baby!
How dare you break wind before me.
I'm sorry I didn't realize it was your turn.
In Japan, men come first and women come second.
Or sometimes not at all.
[Austin is drowning a man in the toilet]
Who does Number Two work for? Who does Number Two work for?
Yeah, that's right buddy! You show that turd who's boss.
Not really. Kill the little bastard, see if I care.
But dad, we just had a breakthrough in group.
I had the group LIQUIDATED, you little shit! They were insolent!
Basil Exposition The shouting is a temporary side-effect of the unfreezing.
Yes... I'm having difficulty controlling THE VOLUME OF MY VOICE.
Hey! There you are!
Tourist Hi... do I know you?
No, but that's where you are! You're there!
That's Dr. Evil's cat!
How can you tell?
I never forget a pussy... cat.
What exactly do you do, Mr. Number Two?
That's my business. Now if you'll excuse, I have to go to the little boys' room.
[trying to resist the Fembots]
No! No! No, I've got to get Dr. Evil. I've got to get Dr. Evil. No, no no, uh, baseball, cold showers, baseball, cold showers.
Fembot
[stands over him]
Give it up, Mr. Powers. [unzips; opens her legs]
Let me ask you a question, and be honest. [activates a rotating bed and music; startling Vanessa] Do I make you horny? Randy? Do I make you horny, baby? Yeah!
[disgusted; to herself]
God, I hope this is part of the unfreezing process. [Austin attempts to pull her to a rotating bed] Ow!!! [turns off the music and rotating bed] Mr. Powers! I will never have sex with you, ever. If you were the last man on earth and I was the last woman on earth, and the future of the human race depends on our having sex, simply for procreation, I still would not have sex with you.
[happily confused]
What's your point, Vanessa?
[Vanessa rolls her eyes and sits down, before Austin turns back on and continues rotating his bed and music]