“Are you a guest? Guests belong in the auditorium, you can't be here!” – Trumpet Kid, American Pie 2 ... Movie Quotes Database

Trumpet Kid

Are you a guest? Guests belong in the auditorium, you can't be here!

Jim

Do you know where I could find Michelle Flaherty?

Trumpet Kid

Guests bring food. Food attracts animals. This one time, a bear came, and then the bear had to be destroyed, which means they shot it in the head with a rifle, and killed it, and it died.

Jim

Yeah, you must know Michelle.

In this scene

Jim Levenstein Jason Biggs More Jim Levenstein quotes →

TK Trumpet Kid Matthew Peters

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Michelle Okay, pretend I'm a hot girl. Now what do you want to do? Jim I want to feel your boobs. Michelle No, you dingbat! You don't just go groping away! You gotta pre-heat the oven before you stick in the turkey! Michelle Good Jim. Ooh, you're making me wet. Jim Holy shit, really? Michelle No, I was just saying that so you could practice. Jim 'Course. Jim This is good, this is good. [looks down at his erect penis] Obviously. Michelle Oh! Uh, Gilligan's Island, Mr. Howell! Jim Uh, what? Michelle You've gotta control yourself and think of something non-sexual. I haven't even touched you yet and you're turning into the Sears Tower!