Most scenes together: Alice & White Rabbit (7), Queen of Hearts & King of Hearts (6), March Hare & Mad Hatter (5)
Oh, Dinah. It's just a rabbit with a waistcoat... and a watch!
Oh, my fur and whiskers! I'm late, I'm late, I'm late!
Now this is curious. What could a rabbit possibly be late for? [running after him] Please, sir!
I'm late, I'm late. For a very important date. No time to say "hello". Goodbye. I'm late, I'm late, I'm late.
Aye, but there's a moral to it.
Oh, a very good moral, if you happen to be an oyster.
A serpent! Help! Help! A serpent, a serpent!
Oh, but please! Please!
Off with you! Shoo! Shoo! Go away! Serpent! Serpeeeent!
But I'm not a serpent!
Serpent- Indeed? Then just what are you?
I'm just a little girl.
Little? Ha! Little? [laughs]
Well, I am! I mean, I-I was.
And I suppose you don't eat eggs, either?
Yes, I do, but, but, but...
I knew it! I knew it! Serpent! Serpeeeent!
Oh, for goodness sake!
Painting the roses red / We're painting the roses red / We dare to stop or waste a drop / So let the paint be spread / We're painting the roses red / We're painting the roses red / Bum bum bum bum / Oh-h-h-h / Painting the roses red / And many a tear we shed
Because we know
They'll cease to grow
In fact, they'll soon be dead
And yet we got ahead / Painting the roses red / Red, red, red, red / Red, red, red, red / Painting the roses red / We're painting the roses red...
I- I hardly know, sir. I've changed so many times since this morning, you see...
I do not 'C.' Explain yourself.
I'm afraid I can't explain myself, sir, because I'm not myself, you know.
I do not know.
Well, I can't put it any more clearly, sir, for it isn't clear to me.
'U'? Who 'R' 'U'?
By the way, I have a few more helpful hints. One side will make you grow taller...
One side of what?
...and the other side will make you grow shorter.
The other side of what?
THE MUSHROOM, OF COURSE!
'Twas brilig, and the slithy toves Did gyre and gimble in the wabe All mimsy were the borogroves, And the mome raths outgrabe.
Now where in the world do you suppose that...?
Lose something?
Oh! Uh, hehe, I...I, no, no, I mean, I, I was just wondering...
Oh, that's...quite all right. One moment please. [two eyes drop down on top of the mouth and the full cat form appears] Second chorus. [singing] 'Twas brilig, and the slithy toves Did gyre and gimble in the wabe.
Why, why you're a cat!
A Cheshire Cat. [starts to disappear] All mimsy were the borogroves...
Oh, wait! Don't go, please!
Oh, no, no. Thank you, but I just wanted to ask which way I ought to go.
Well that depends on where you ought to get to.
Oh, it really doesn't matter, as long as I...
Then it really doesn't matter which way you go. Oh by the way, if you'd really like to know, he went that way.
Who did?
The White Rabbit.
He did?
He did what?
He went that way.
Who did?
The white rabbit!
What rabbit?
But didn't you just say-? I mean- Oh dear!
Can you stand on your head? If I were looking for a white rabbit, I'd ask the Mad Hatter.
The Mad Hatter? Oh, no no no...
Or, there's the March Hare, in that direction.
Oh, thank you. I think i shall visit him...
Of course, he's mad, too.
But I don't want to go among mad people!
Oh, you can't help that. Most everyone's mad here. [laughs maniacally and begins to disappear] You may have noticed that I'm not all there myself.
What kind of a garden do you come from?
Oh, I don't come from any garden.
Do you suppose she's a wildflower?
Just what species or, shall we say, genus are you, my dear?
Well, I guess you would call me... genus, humanus... Alice.
Ever see an alice with a blossom like that?
Come to think of it, did you ever see an Alice?
We'll blow the thing there out, we'll smoke the monster out!
NO! No-ho! My poor house and furniture!
D'ooooh!
Oh! I beg your pardon...
Whew. Quite all right, but you did give me quite a turn.
You see, I was following...
Rather good, what? Doorknob? Turn? Since one good turn deserves another, what can I do for you?
Read the directions and directly you will be directed in the right direction.
"Drink Me". [uncorks the bottle] Hm, better look first. For if one drinks much from a bottle marked "Poison", it's almost certain to disagree with one sooner or later.
Beg your pardon?
I was just giving myself some good advice. [sighs] But... [drinks from the "Drink Me" bottle] Mmm... tastes like, uh... cherry tart. [unknowingly shrinks down to the size of the table; takes another sip] Custard. [shrinks down again, barely holding onto the bottle; takes another drink] Pineapple. [shrinks down so much, she's now even smaller than the bottle itself and struggling with its weight] Roast turkey - [finally aware of the potion's effect] Goodness! [unable to support the bottle any longer, she slips and drops it; the "Drink Me" label covers her] What did I do?!
No use. [laughs] I forgot to tell you. I'm locked!
Oh, no!
What key?
Now, don't tell me you've left it up there?!
What do you know about this unfortunate affair?
Nothing.
Nothing whatever?
Nothing whatever!
THAT'S VERY IMPORTANT!! Jury, write that down!
Ah thank goodness! Those are the things that upset me!
See all the trouble you started?
But I didn't think...
Ah, that's just it. If you don't think, then you shouldn't talk.
What's the matter, my dear? Don't you care for tea?
Why, yes. I'm very fond of tea, but-
If you don't care for tea, you could at least make polite conversation!
I have an excellent idea. Let's change the subject.
Why is a raven like a writing desk?
Riddles? [to herself] Let me see. Why is a raven like a writing desk?
I beg your pardon?
Why is a raven like a writing desk?
But it's your silly riddle. You just said...
THE TIME! THE TIME! WHO'S GOT THE TIME?
N-n-n-no time, no time, no time! Hello, good bye, I'm late, I'm late.
The rabbit!
I'm so late! I'm so very late.
Well, no wonder you're late! Why this clock is EXACTLY two days slow!
Two days slow?
Of course you're late! [chuckles as he dunks the watch in the tea] MY GOODNESS! We'll have to look into this. [places a salt shaker over his eye and uses it as a jeweler's eyepiece ] AHA! I see what's wrong with it! [starts to pry parts out of the watch with a fork ] Why, this watch is full of wheels!
BUTTER! Of course! It NEEDS some butter. BUTTER!!!
Butter! Oh, thank you! Ha ha! Yes! That's FINE! Yes, thank you!
Oh, no, no! No, no! No! You'll get crumbs in it!
Oh, THIS is the VERY BEST butter! [throws butter in rabbit's face] What are you talking about?
Tea?
Oh, tea! I never THOUGHT of tea before! OF COURSE!
NO!
TEA! HEHEHE!
Sugar?
SUGAR! TWO SPOONS! Yes, ha, TWO SPOONS thank you, Yes! (jams the spoons straight into the watch)
JAM?
JAM! I FORGOT ALL ABOUT JAM!
NO! NO! NOT JAM!
Yes, sure you want. It's nice to see.
MUSTARD??
Mustard! yes...huh? MUSTARD?! DON'T LET'S BE SILLY!!! LEMON, that's different, that's... yes. THAT should work! Hahaha! [watch starts going crazy] LOOK AT THAT!
IT'S GOING MAD!
OH, MY GOODNESS!
OH, DEAR!
I DON'T UNDERSTAND! IT'S THE BEST BUTTER!
IT'S GOING MAD! MAD WATCH! MAD WATCH! MAD WATCH!!!
OH, MY GOODNESS! OH, DEAR, LOOK AT THAT!
THERE'S ONLY ONE WAY TO STOP A MAD WATCH! [smashes watch with a mallet; scene changes from color to black and white, then color again]
Two days slow. That's what it is.
Would you like a little more tea?
Well, I haven't had any yet, so I can't very well take more.
Ah, you mean you can't very well take less.
Yes. You can always take more than nothing.
