Well, Miss, ‘ere we are, everything ship shape, like they say. Ah, it's a great thing to have a lady aboard with clean habits. It sets the man a good example. A man alone, he gets to livin' like a hog. Ha, ha. Then, too, with me, it's always: 'Put things off. Never do today what you can put off 'til tomorrow.' But with you: 'Business before pleasure.' Every time. Do all your personal laundry. Make yourself spic-and-span, get all the mending out of the way, and then - and only then - sit down for a nice quiet hour with the Good Book. I tell you, it's a model - like an inspiration. Why, I ain't had this old engine so clean in years, inside and out. Ha, ha. Just look at her, Miss. See how she practically sparkles. Myself, too. Guess you ain't never had a look at me without my whiskers and all cleaned up. I bet you wouldn't hardly recognize me, works that much of a change. Freshens ya up, too. If I only had some clean clothes, like you. Now you - why you could be at high tea. Say, that's an idea, Miss. How's about a nice little cup of tea? Now don't you stir, I'll be glad to make it for you.

[silence]

Uh, how's the Book, Miss? [no answer] Well, not that I ain't read it. That is to say, my poor old Mum used to read me stories out of it. [no answer] How's about reading it out loud? [silence] I could sure do with a little spiritual comfort, myself. [Yelling at her] And you call yourself a Christian! Do you hear me? Don't ya? Don't ya? Huh? What ya being so mean for, Miss? A man takes a drop too much once in a while. It's only human nature.

Nature, Mr. Allnut, is what we are put in this world to rise above.

Miss, I'm sorry. I apologize. What more can a man do than say he's sorry, huh? [no answer] You done paid me back, Miss. You didn't even leave me a drop. Miss, have a heart. Fair is fair. You gotta say somethin', I don't care what it is, but you gotta say something. I'll be honest with ya, Miss. I, I just can't stand no more of this. I-I just ain't used to it, that's all.