Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest

Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest quotes

146 total quotes (ID: 450)

Bloopers
Captain Jack Sparrow
Davy Jones
Elizabeth Swann
Lord Cutler Beckett
Other
Will Turner


Jack: My tremendous intuitive sense of the female creatures informs me that you are troubled.
Elizabeth: I just thought 'd be married by now. 'm so ready to be married.
[Jack looks at her chest then hands her a bottle of rum]
Jack: You know, [clears throat] Lizzie, I am captain of a ship, and being captain of a ship I could in fact perform a marry-agh. Right here. Right on this deck. Right now.
Elizabeth: [Looks disgusted] No thank you.
Jack: Why not? We are very much alike, you and I, I and you, us.
Elizabeth: Except for a sense of honor, and decency, and a moral center. And personal hygiene.
Jack: [Smells under arm] Trifles. You will come over to my side, I know it.
Elizabeth: You seem very certain.
Jack: One word love: curiosity. You long for freedom. You long to do what you want to do because you want it. To act on selfish impulse. You want to see what it's like. One day, you won't be able to resist.
Elizabeth: Why doesn't your compass work?
Jack:...My compass works fine.
Elizabeth: Because you and I are alike. And there will come a moment when you will show it. To do the right thing.
Jack: I love those moments. I like to wave at them as they pass by.
Elizabeth: You'll have the chance to do something, something courageous. And when you do you'll discover something. That you're a good man.
Jack: All evidence to the contrary.
Elizabeth: Oh, I have faith in you. You want to know why?
Jack: Do tell, dearie.
Elizabeth: Curiosity. You're going to want it. A chance to be admired, and gain the rewards that follow. You won't be able to resist. You're going to want to know what it tastes like. [Leans in close to him]
Jack: [Eyes widen] I do want to know what it tastes like.
Elizabeth: But, seeing as you're a good man I know that you'd never put me in a position that would compromise my honor.
Jack: [Leans in to kiss her; sees black spot reappear on his hand and pulls away]
Elizabeth: 'm proud of you, Jack.


Davy Jones: You've been captain of the Black Pearl for thirteen years. That was our agreement.
Jack: Technically, I was only captain for two years before I was viciously mutinied upon...
Davy Jones: Then you were a poor captain, but a captain nonetheless! Have you not introduced yourself, all these years, as Captain Jack Sparrow? [Jones' crew laugh mockingly.]
Jack: You have my payment. One soul to serve on your ship is already over there.
Davy Jones: One soul is not equal to another.
Jack: Aha! So we've established my proposal is sound in principle, now we're just haggling over price.
Davy Jones: [intrigued.] Price? [makes popping noise.]
Jack: Just how many souls do you think my soul is worth?
Davy Jones: One hundred souls. Three days.
Jack: You're a diamond, mate! Send me back the boy [Will Turner], we'll get started right off.
Davy Jones: I keep the boy. A good faith payment. That leaves you only 99 more to go. [laughs along with his crew]
Jack: Have you not met Will Turner? He's noble, heroic, terrific soprano, worth at least four...maybe three and a half. And did I happen to mention - He's in love. With a girl. Due to be married. Betrothed. Dividing him from her and her from him would only be half as cruel as actually allowing them to be joined holy matrimony, eh? Eh?
Davy Jones: [brief period of misty-eyed weakness, quickly recovers.] I keep the boy, 99 souls. But I wonder, Sparrow, can you live with this? Can you condemn an innocent man, a friend, to a lifetime of servitude in your name, while you roam free?
Jack: [beat.] Yep! 'm good with it. So, shall we seal it in blood, I mean, er... ink?

Davy Jones: [To shivering sailor while lighting pipe] Do you fear death? Do you fear that dark abyss? All your deeds laid bare, all your sins punished? [Shivering sailor nods.] I can offer you an escape.
Other Dying Sailor: Don't listen to him. [Holding a small cross in his hands]
Davy Jones: [examines Other Dying Sailor, puffing on pipe] Do you not...fear death?
Dying Sailor: I'll take my chances, sir.
Davy Jones: To the depths!
[Jones' crewman slits the sailor's throat and dumps him overboard.]
Another Dying Sailor: Cruel blackguard!
Davy Jones: Life is cruel! Why should the afterlife be any different? I offer you a choice. Join my crew and postpone that final judgement. One hundred years before the mast. Will ye serve?
First Sailor: I-I will serve.
Davy Jones: [guttural] There! [notices Will for the first time.] You are neither dead nor dying. What is your purpose here?
Will: [mutters.] Jack Sparrow sent me to settle his debt.
Davy Jones: [leans forward, surprised] What is your purpose here?
Will: Jack Sparrow..? Sent me to settle his debt?
Davy Jones: [chuckling] Did he, now? I'm sorely tempted to accept that offer!

Tia Dalma: You know of Davy Jones, yes? A man of the sea. A great sailor. Until he ran afoul of that which vexes all men.
Will: What vexes all men?
Tia Dalma: What, indeed?
Gibbs: The sea?
Pintel: Sums?
Ragetti: The dichotomy of good and evil?
[Everyone stares at Ragetti.]
Jack: A woman.
Tia Dalma: See, it was a woman. He fell in love...
Gibbs: No, no, no, I heard it was the sea he fell in love with.
Tia Dalma: [cutting off all argument.] Same story, different versions. And all are true. You see, it was a woman. As harsh, changing and untamable like the sea. Him never stopped loving her...

Gibbs: [as Jack steps onto the Black Pearl, holding a severed skeletal leg.] Not quite according to plan.
Jack: Complications arose, ensued, were overcome.

Bosun: Impeding me in my duties? You'll share the punishment!
'Bootstrap' Bill Turner: I'll take it all!
Davy Jones: [arrives on scene] Will you, now? And what would prompt such an act of charity?
'Bootstrap' Bill Turner: [hesitantly] My son...He's my son.
[Davy Jones bursts into laughter]
Davy Jones: What fortuitous circumstance be this! Five lashes be owed, I believe it is...[thrusts whip at 'Bootstrap' Bill Turner]

My tremendous intuitive sense of the female creature informs me that you are troubled.

[Marked by the Black Spot, Jack Sparrow runs around on deck, rousing the crew.]
Jack: All hands on deck! Make fast the bunt gasket! On deck! Scurry! Scurry! I want movement! Movement! I want movement! Lift the skin up! Keep your loof! Haul those sheets! Run them! Run! Keep running! Run as if the Devil himself and itself is upon us!
Gibbs: Do we have a heading?
Jack: Argh! [realises who it is.] Run! Land.
Gibbs: Which port?
Jack: I didn't say 'port'. I said 'land'. Any land.

Bootstrap Bill, you are a liar and will spend an eternity on this ship! Master Turner, feel free to go ashore ... the very next time we make port! [laughs]

Bootstrap Bill: You made a deal with him too, Jack. He raised the Pearl from the depths for you. Thirteen years you've been captain!
Jack: Technically...
Bootstrap Bill: Jack! You won't be able to talk yourself out of this. The terms what apply to me apply to you as well. One soul... bound to crew a hundred years upon his ship!
Jack: Yes but the Flying Dutchman already has a captain so there's really no...
Bootstrap Bill: Then there's the Locker for you!! Jones' terrible leviathan will find you and drag the Pearl down to the depths and you along with it!
Jack: Any idea when Jones might release said terrible beastie?
Bootstrap Bill: I already told you, Jack... your time's up. [marks him with the Black Spot.] It comes now, drawn with ravenous hunger, to the man who bears the Black Spot.

Let no joyful voice be heard! Let no man look up at the sky with hope! And let this day be cursed by we who ready to wake ... the Kraken!!!!

Will: [about the key to the Dead Man's Chest.] You want me to find this?
Jack: No. You want you to find this. Because the finding of this finds you incapacitorially finding and/or locating in your discovering, a detecting of a way to save your dolly belle, dear ol' what's-her-face. [pause.] Savvy?
Will: [pointing at Jack's drawling of a key] This is going to save Elizabeth?
Jack: How much do you know about Davy Jones?
Will: Not much..
Jack: Yeah, it's gonna save Elizabeth.

Will: [watching the crew play Liar's Dice] So any crewmember can be challenged?
Bootstrap Bill: Aye, anyone.
Will: I challenge Davy Jones. [The crew falls silent. Organ music stops as footsteps get louder. Jones appears on deck]
Davy Jones: I accept, mate.

Will: Why is Jack afraid of the open ocean?
Gibbs: Well, if you believe such things... there's a beast does the bidding of Davy Jones - a fearsome creature with giant tentacles that'll suction your face clean off, and drag an entire ship down to the crushing darkness. The Kraken. They say the stench of its breath is...[shudders] Imagine... the last thing you know on God's green Earth is the roar of the Kraken, and the reeking odor of a thousand rotting corpses... if you believe such things.
Will: And the key will spare him that?
Gibbs: Well, that's the very question Jack wants answered. Bad enough even to go visit...her.
Will: "Her?"

Flying Dutchman's First Mate: Down on your marrow-bones and pray!