Donnie quotes from TMNT (2007)

And with rocketing interest rates, that's bad news for homeowners as the real estate market continues its downward spiral. Coming up, the vigilante known as Nightwatcher strikes again.

Ooh, now, I can't say for sure, but he was definitely an alien.

I think it's a disgrace, taking the law into your own hands like that. Leave it to the police!

Michelangelo

I remember how that used to feel, busting up crime syndicates. Sure, they had a bunch of guns, but they weren't like these guns. [flexes his muscles]

Donatello

Why do you do this to yourself, Mikey? Those glory days are over. Forget about them. Get on with your life. Concentrate on your work.

Raphael

Yeah, yeah, spoken like a true has-been.

Well, look who woke up. [seriously; sick and tired of Raph's laziness] I suppose you think the Nightwatcher's some kind of hero.

Beats sitting around doing nothing while dirtbags run free. [crushes a soda can with his bare fist]

I would love to know what it is that you do that's so great. At least we're contributing around here, all you do is sleep all day.

Yeah. I do nothing. You're right. [points an accusing finger at Donnie] You got me all figured out.

Well, I know that your rogue attitude has always been a source of contention to this team. You think fear is the best way to accomplish things, [raising his voice] but you're wrong.

First of all, this "team" you speak of doesn't exist anymore. And second of all... [almost punches Donnie, who flinches]

Raphael. [appears] Enough.

Heh, I think I made my point.

That doesn't prove anything. [Raph leaves the room; to Splinter; under his breath, bitterly] Why couldn't you send him away for training?

Donatello, this home has become like an empty shell. Each of your brothers has strengths and weaknesses. You must learn to be strong when they are weak. If you don't learn to recognize this, then all hope is lost for our family.

This is why we need jetpacks.

Okay, any more bright ideas?

How about this? [he and Donnie look at each other, and they both scream in terror while Mikey jumps into Donnie's arms, Scooby-Doo-style; a piece of scaffolding falls on top of the Turtles]

When this is over, I'm totally calling the architect.

Dudes, did anyone get the license plate of that thing that hit us last night? Oy, my head...

Okay, th-that was just weird. I mean, first the Foot, then that hideous monster--

Yeah. It looked like your mom, dude! [laughs]

Yeah, that would make her your mom too, doofus.

Yeah, whatever.

Raph

Keep laughin', Mikey. Last night was an embarrassment. [slams his fist on the table]

I'll tell you what's embarrassing: You can't even follow a single order.

Raph

Oh-ho-ho-ho, how cute. [seriously] You've been back for 5 minutes, and now you're schoolin' us on your master plan?

Oh, oh, okay, so this is my fault now, huh, Raph? [raising his voice] I'm the only one that has to be responsible?!

Raph

Hey, you're the "trained master", not me.

Dudes, can it, here comes Splinter. [quickly drops his breakfast pizza slice and covers the bandaged spot on his head]

Ooh, good morning, my sons!

Good morning, sensei.

Raph

'Sup?

Every Ninja's day should start with a healthy breakfast. [Leo and Raph angrily glare at each other while eating their cereal. Donnie notices but Splinter doesn't] It fills me with pride to see you boys together again. If anyone needs me, I'll be watching my stories.

Hothead.

Raph

Splinter Jr.

Cody is going to break up with Donna. I just know it. [turns on the TV and sits down]

We interrupt The Gilmore Girls for this special news report.

Monsters loose in the city? Strange reports are coming in tonight about a construction site incident that sounds like something out of science fiction.

BOYS?! [cut to the Turtles kneeling in front of Splinter] Leonardo, I am most disappointed in you. You are the eldest of your brothers. I was counting on you to bring order to the chaos of this family. This is why I have forbidden any surface activity. We cannot return to the surface to fight evil if we continue to fight each other.

But, Master Splinter, how can I be expected to do so when Raph--?

There are NO EXCUSES when you are the leader, my student!

Raph

We have to go out and find who's responsible for this. There ain't no other solution.

Save the brute vigilante junk for that Night Watchman.

Raph

Ugh.

"Nightwatcher".

Yeah, whatever.

Raph

I'm going out.

April

Leo, you came back!

Casey

Leo!

Sorry the reunion isn't under better circumstances.

Whoa-ho-ho. Nice pad, kids. [to Raph] Oh, hey, Raph.

Well, his vital signs seem to be okay. [opens Raph's eye] Pupil dilation is normal. [shocked] Whoa. [sees a stone star on Raph's shell]

Whoa.

Some sort of stone. Probably obsidian, I think.

Well, is he gonna be all right?

Raph

You're still here? Go back to your jungle.

Well, at least his personality's still intact.

And there's an engraving on it, looks... South American. That's your department, April.

Casey

Would it help things if I told you that those statues you collected for that Winters guy were shooting these things at me and Raph?

April

"The Legend... of Yaotl"? It can't be. I-I-It was just a myth. A-A scary story the locals told kids around a campfire.

Whoa, what are you talking about?

April

They say... 3,000 years ago, some... great warrior actually found... a portal to another dimension. [camera fades to Yaotl] And when the portal opened, the energy from it gave the warrior eternal life. But it also turned his generals to stone. What if this warrior just kept living forever? He would spend the rest of his days in regret, spending all of his riches and all of his power, trying to find a way to revive his stone generals. Maybe, just maybe, he's built a new empire. [camera pans to Winters' face, and he opens his eyes; fade back to April's apartment] But, hey, like I said, it's just a myth.

Hmmm. If you ask me, you guys, this has Winters' name written all over it.

How do you figure that, Donnie?

Yeah.

Because this has Winters' name written all over it.

Raph

Now I know who to thank for the shot in the arm. [sits down] So where do we find this guy and his stone jokers?

We're not going anywhere until we get Splinter's blessing.

Raph

You're gonna stand here and quote a rulebook to me that you ain't been following for a year?!

Look, Raph, if you got something you want to get off your shell, now's the time. But I'm not going to stand here and debate Splinter's direct orders with you!

Raph

Fine, then. I quit.

Casey

Hey, Raph. Don't do it, man. Sometimes just taking a breather is the best thing to do.

Raph

Whatever.

Raph

You're gonna need these if you're gonna lead us out of here.

I'm going to need you too.

April

Winters?

Looks more like fall, get it?

Mikey, remember our talk.