quotes

View Quote [narrating] Alright, people, let’s do this one last time. My name is Peter B. Parker. I was bitten by a radioactive spider. And for the last 22 years– I thought I was the one and only Spider-Man. What a day. [narrating] I'm pretty sure you know the rest. You see, I saved the city, fell in love, I got married– saved the city some more, maybe too much. My marriage got testy, made some dicey money choices. Don’t invest in a spider-themed restaurant. Then like 15 years passed. Blah, blah, blah. Super boring. I broke my back, a drone flew into my face, I buried Aunt May. My wife and I– split up. But I handled it like a champion. [crying in the shower] 'Cause, you know what, no matter how many times I get hit, I always get back up. And I got a lot of time to reflect and work on myself. Did you know that seahorses, that they mate for life? Could you imagine? A seahorse seeing another seahorse– and then making it work? [line ringing as he trys to call MJ] She wanted kids and– And it scared me. [Hangs up] I'm pretty sure I broke her heart. Flash-forward: I'm in my apartment doing push-ups– doing ab crunches, getting strong– when this weird thing happened. And I gotta say, weird things happen to me a lot. But this was real weird. [Yells as he getting sucked into the wormhole] [screaming as he's heralding downtown] [Grunting as he hits everything] Ow! [narrating] You see, I was in New York, but the things were different. Also, I was dead. And blonde. I was kind of perfect. It was like looking in a mirror. (Well, in a– different way.) I have a feeling that the thing that brought me here was the thing that got him killed. You wanna know what happened next? Me too.

View Quote Here's lesson number one, kid. Don't watch the mouth. Watch the hands.

View Quote And it's a no on the cape. [Miles Morales: I think it's cool.] Take that off. It's disrespectful. Spider-Man doesn't wear a cape.

View Quote Teenagers are just the worst.

View Quote Time to swing, just like I taught you. [Miles Morales: When did you teach me that?] I didn't. It's a little joke for team-building.

View Quote Everybody knows that the best way to learn is under intense life-threatening pressure.

View Quote We're a little team! Me as the teacher who could still do it. You as the student who can do it, just not as good. I'm proud of us.

View Quote Save it for Comic-Con.

View Quote This could literally not get any weirder.

View Quote Let me guess. You're Scorpion. Well, we're the Spider-... Gang.

View Quote You won't. It's a leap of faith. That's all it is, Miles. A leap of faith.