N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z #

School of Rock

School of Rock quotes

35 total quotes

View Quote Dewey: [half asleep] How'd you guys get in here?
Freddy: Front door was open.
Dewey: Why aren't you guys in school?
Lawrence: We did what you told us. We stuck it to the Man.
Dewey: Forget about everything I told you. Look, I'm a loser, okay? You listen to my advice, you'll end up like me with nothing.
Freddy: Come on, man, quit goofing around. This is serious business. We're on a mission. One great rock show can change the world. [bus horn honks from outside] Look out the window.
[Dewey looks outside to find the school bus with all the other kids calling for him to come down]
Dewey: No way... That is so punk rock...
View Quote Dewey: [singing] Math is a wonderful thing. Math is a really cool thing. So get off your 'ath, let's do some math. Math, math, math, math, math. Three minus four is...
Summer: Negative one.
Dewey: [singing] That's riiiiight. And six times a billion is...
Marco: Six billion?
Dewey: [singing] Nailed it! And 54 is 45 more than...What is the answer Marta?
Marta: Nine.
Dewey: [singing] No it's eight.
Marta: [singing] No, it's nine.
Dewey: [singing] Yes, I was just testing you, it's nine. And that's a magic number.
View Quote Dewey: [to the class on his first day] OK, Teach. Teach. Teach. Alright, look, here’s the deal. I’ve got a hangover. Who knows what that means?
Frankie: Doesn't that mean you’re drunk?
Dewey: No. It means I was drunk yesterday.
Freddy: It means you're an alcoholic.
Dewey: Wrong.
Freddy: You wouldn't come to work unless you were an alcoholic. Dude, you got a disease!
Dewey: Mmm-hmm. What's your name?
Freddy: Freddy Jones.
Dewey: Mmm, Freddy Jones, shut up!
View Quote Dewey: Hey! What's up? Is that a new song? Who's this guy?
Theo: Dewey, we're taking the Battle of the Bands seriously this year.
Dewey: Good, because I need the money. Now, listen. If we're gonna win this thing, we gotta actually start playing some music.
Theo: I agree. You're fired.
Dewey: Your lyrics, now, don't take this the wrong way, Theo, are lame. But I've been sitting on some awesome material, so...
Theo: Dewey, did you hear what I said? We voted. You're out. This is Spider; he's replacing you.
Spider: What's up, dawg?
Neil: I was gonna tell you last night, Dewey, but you passed out, man.
Dewey: Okay, you're gonna kick me out of the band? You're gonna fire me? Well, this is my band. I brought us together.
Neil: Theo wanted you out. There's nothing I could do.
Theo: Shut up, man. You voted him out, too. I didn't tell you what to do. Dewey, listen to me. You're a good guitar player, but it's the 20-minute solos, it's the stage dives. We're trying to land a record deal here, man, and you're an embarrassment.
Dewey: Read between the lines, Theo. Read between the lines!
Neil: Dewey, man, I hope this doesn't come between us. Like, I care about you, man.
Dewey: You forgot about one thing. It's called the music. And I don't even care. You know what? So what? I don't wanna hang out with wannabe corporate sellouts. I'm gonna form my own band. We're gonna start a revolution. And you're gonna be a funny little footnote on my epic ass. I feel sorry for you guys.
View Quote Dewey: I totally screwed up. I told the kids that if they practiced, they'd get into the Battle of the Bands.
Coordinator: What'd you tell them that for?
Dewey: I don't know, I just...I wanted to give them something to look forward to, to keep their spirits up. Look at them. [he and the Coordinator look at the kids, who are faking sick] They're terminal. Every last one of them. And all they wanted to do before they bit the dust was play Battle of the Bands.
Coordinator: What do they all have?
Dewey: It’s a... rare blood disease. "Stick-it-to-da-man-neosis."
Coordinator: What's that? I've never heard of it.
Dewey: You're lucky. Because it's hell.
View Quote Dewey: If you wanna rock, you gotta break the rules. You gotta get mad at The Man, and right now I'm The Man. That's right, I'm The Man, and who's got the guts to tell me off? Huh? Who's gonna tell me off?
Freddy: Shut up, Schneebly!
Dewey: That's it, Freddy. That's it! Who can top him?
Alicia: Get outta here, stupid.
Dewey: Yes, Alicia.
Summer: You're a joke. You're the worst teacher I've ever had.
Dewey: Summer, that is great. I like the delivery because I felt your anger.
Summer: Thank you.
Lawrence: You're a fat loser, and you have body odor.
Dewey: All right. All right! Now is everyone nice and ticked off?
Class: Yeah!
Dewey: Good! Time to write a rock song! Now what makes you mad more than anything in the world? Billy?
Billy: You.
Dewey: Billy, we've already told me off. Let's move on.
Billy: You're tacky and I hate you.
Dewey: Okay, you see me after class.
View Quote Dewey: Look, the first thing you do when you start a rock band is talk about your influences. That's how you figure out what kind of band to be. So who do you like? Blondie?
Marta: Christina Aguilera.
Dewey: Who? No! Come on. What? You, Shortstop.
Leonard: Puff Daddy.
Dewey: Wrong. Billy?
Billy: Liza Minnelli?
Dewey: What are you...? You guys! This project is called "Rock Band". I'm talking about bands that rock. Led Zeppelin. [the class gives him blank stares] Don't tell me you guys have never got the Led out. Jimmy Page, Robert Plant? Ring any bells? What about Sabbath? AC/DC? Motörhead?! OH, WHAT DO THEY TEACH IN THIS PLACE?!
View Quote Dewey: Mornin', Summer.
Summer: Groupie?
Dewey: What's the matter?
Summer: You want me to be a groupie?
Dewey: Well, groupie is an important job.
Summer: I researched groupies on the Internet. and they do stuff, weird stuff with the band!
Dewey: No, that's not true! They're like cheerleaders.
Summer: I don't want to be a cheerleader. Look, my mother's a room parent, and she's not gonna be happy when she hears about this.
Dewey: Okay, I didn't want to say this to you in front of the other kids 'cause I didn't want to make 'em jealous, but I made a special position just for you. And it's the most important job of all: band manager.
Summer: Band manager?
Dewey: Oh, yeah.
Summer: What's that?
Dewey: Well, I'm gonna be busy rocking out, so it's up to you to make sure everyone is doing their job. Summer, you're in charge of everything.
Summer: Okay.
View Quote Dewey: Now, listen, normal kids would have been stoked to slack off, but not you guys, because you're not normal, you're special. And because I think you guys have the right attitude, I think it's time we started our new class project.
Lawrence: A science project?
Dewey: No. It's called... "Rock Band".
Marta: Is this a school project?
Dewey: Yes. And it's a requirement. And it may sound easy, but nothing could be harder. It will test your head [points to his head], and your mind [points to his jaw], and your brain too [points to his forehead].
Summer: Will other schools be competing?
Dewey: You could say that. You could say that every school in the state will be competing for the top prize.
Billy: What's the prize?
Dewey: A win will go on your permanent record. Hello Harvard, Yo?
View Quote Dewey: Oh, you wanna learn something?
Summer: Yes, I do.
Dewey: You want me to teach you something? [most of the students nod] Here's a useful lesson for you: give up. Just quit. Because in this life, you can't win. Sure, you can try. [really getting angry] But in the end you're just gonna lose, BIG TIME. Because THE WORLD is run by The Man.
Frankie: Who?
Dewey: The Man. Oh, you don't know The Man? [class shakes their heads] He's everywhere. In the White House, down the hall, MISS MULLINS, she's The Man. And The Man ruined the ozone, and he's burning down the Amazon, and he kidnapped Shamu and put her in a chlorine tank! Okay? And there used to be a way to stick it to The Man. It was called rock ‘n’ roll. But guess what. Oh, no. The Man ruined that too with a little thing called MTV! So don’t waste your time trying to make anything cool or pure or awesome, because The Man’s just going to call you a fat, washed up loser and crush your soul. So do yourselves a favor and just GIVE UP!!!!
View Quote Dewey: OK, we are good to go.
Summer: No, we're not. Freddy took off.
Dewey: What? Where?
Summer: Some guys invited him out to their van.
Dewey: WHAT?! Come on, you guys!
View Quote Dewey: Okay, yes, you can be in my band, but, Ned, no power plays, man. I've got vision up the butt, so just go with it.
Ned: [chuckles] No, thanks.
Dewey: [shows Ned a photo of him in his old band] You're not a teacher, Ned. You're the cross-dressing, blood-sucking incubus from Maggot Death. That's the real you!
Ned: Dewey, I'm not a sexy satanic god anymore. I'm a working stiff. And that's cool.
Dewey: She's got you brainwashed, man.
Patty: Can you see that I'm working?
Dewey: That's terrific. But who are you, babe? This is my apartment, babe.
Patty: Oh... Not if you don't pay your rent, it's not. Get a job!
Dewey: I got a job, okay? I'm gonna have your rent by the end of the week. Go tell the mayor.
Patty: You got a job. Doing what?
Dewey: I do what Ned does, I'm temping.
Ned: I'm not a temp, I'm a sub. And soon I'll be a certified teacher.
Dewey: Come on, man! One show, $20,000 prize, we split it 60-40, grab your bass, and come back to the garage, brother! I mean, don't you miss rocking out?
Patty: Dewey, if you think anyone in the right mind is gonna wanna be in a band with you, you're more delusional than I thought.
Ned: Dewey, you know, maybe it's time to give up those dreams. I did, and things are going really great for me.
View Quote Freddy: I'm just saying, name two great chick drummers.
Katie: Sheila E? Meg White from The White Stripes?
Freddy: She can't drum!
Katie: She's a better drummer than you. At least she has rhythm.
Mullins: Freddy, where are your sleeves? And what have you done to your hair?
Freddy: It's called punk.
Mullins: Well, it's not school uniform. [pulls Freddy's sleeves back down]
Frankie: Miss Mullins, you're The Man.
Mullins: Thank you, Frankie.
[Frankie and some of the other students giggle behind her back.]
View Quote Freddy: Um, are we going to be goofing off like this every day?
Dewey: Uh, we're not goofing off, we're creating musical fusion.
Freddy: Well, are we going to be creating musical fusion every day?
Dewey: Yeah, get used to it.
[Freddy smiles]
View Quote Freddy: What are we gonna play?
Dewey: Uh, you don't have to worry about that. We have awesome material, which I wrote.
Zack: Let's hear it.
Dewey: What?
Zack: Let's hear your song.
Dewey: I'll play you my song, if you wanna hear it. Thing is, I just want you to keep in mind that...I wrote it in like, 15 minutes, and uh, it's not done yet, and you might not like it-
Freddy: Just play the song, Schneebly!
Dewey: Okay! I will sing it for you, just, uh, let me get in the zone, I wasn't planning on unveiling it, but I will sing it. Teeth of the tongue, and the lips. [performs vocal exercise] Okay, it starts off...a dark stage, and then a beam of light. and then you can see me and my guitar. [imitating his guitar] Dew-neew-dew-neew... " In the end of time, there was a man who knew the road, and the writing was written on the stone." And then a thin layer of fog comes in around my ankles. Roadies, that means dry ice, we're gonna talk about this later. "In the ancient time, an artist led the way, but no-one seemed to understand." Chimes, Freddy. "In his heart he knew, the artist must be true, and the legend of the rent was way past due!" And, Katie, you come in with the bass! [imitating the bass] Rim-bim-bim-bim-bim-beru-beru-bum-bara-bara-bara-bum-bum-bum! "Well, you think you'll be just fine without me, but you're mine! You think that you can kick me out of the band?" And then, Zack, you come in with a face-melter. [imitates the guitar] Rew-new-new-didli-new-didli-new-didli-new! Okay? "Well, there's just one problem there, the band is MINE! How can you kick me out [high pitched] of what is mine?" And then, sh- "Hawaii Five-O". You see that show? Okay. Well, there's a drum solo in it, that goes...shugadugadugaduga! "You're not hardcore, unless you live hardcore" And then, that's where I want the backup singers to be all like, "No, you're not hardcore. [high pitched] No, you're not hardcore! [reverts to normal singing voice] Unless you live hardcore. [imitating backup singers] Unless you live hardcore! [back to his own voice] But the legend of the rent, was way hardcore! BOOM! Big old explosion, some, like, confetti comes down. Anyway, that's all I got so far, it's a work in progress.
Summer: I liked it, Mr. Schneebly. I thought it was really catchy.
Dewey: Thank you.