Patch Don't you believe in Santa Claus?
Why should I? He never brought me anything.
Patch That's because you were probably a naughty boy.
Yes. I guess I was... no angel.
Played by Dudley Moore 
Santa Claus: The Movie (1985) · 12 quotes
Santa Claus: The Movie (1985) · 12 quotes
Tied for most-quoted character in Santa Claus: The Movie (1985): in 4 of its 12 quotes
Most scenes with: B.Z. (3)
Scenes with Patch
4 scenes Patch Patch Patch [Patch is telling B.Z. about the special Christmas product he intends to make]
"If you give extra kisses, you get bigger hugs."
Sorry?
Patch That's what Santa's wife's always saying. [chuckles awkwardly] Anyway, that's all the advertising you'll ever need.
It better be. How many workers does this, uh, product require?
Patch Just me.
What? No payroll?
Patch Well, my needs are small: a bowl of stew, heavy on the dill, a cold place to sleep--
What will it cost?
Patch [confused]
Cost? Cost whom?
The people who...who buy the toy.
Patch Well, nothing; we're going to give them away free.
Patch [B.Z's face turns beet red and he looks ready to burst] [intrigued]
Oh! Oh, that's fantastic! How do you make your face so red so fast?
FOR FREE?!?!?!
Patch Well, that's how we do it at the North Pole--
WELL, THAT'S NOT HOW WE DO IT HERE, IN A FREE ENTERPRISE SYSTEM!!!
When you've got a hit like we have, Patch, the people don't wanna wait a whole year, they're dying for a sequel! A sequel. That's it. We'll bring it out on March 25, and we'll call it... Christmas II!
Patch Christmas II?
Elves are making a suit for Santa
Honka
It takes time for me. I have never done an extra large before.
Anya
I do not mean to put down your work, but green is just not his color.
Puffy
What about brown?
Patch How about red?
Anya
Yes!
