Mitch Taylor Being snubbed by beauticians is not my idea of relaxing.
Played by Gabriel Jarret 
Real Genius (1985) · 78 quotes
Real Genius (1985) · 78 quotes
2nd most-quoted character in Real Genius (1985): in 20 of its 78 quotes
Most scenes with: Chris Knight (7), Kent Torokvei (4), Jordan (3)
You rented out my room!? Mom, to who?!
More lines from Mitch Taylor
2 quotes Mitch Taylor Mitch Taylor Cut the crap Kent, you've built a weapon.
Scenes with Mitch Taylor
17 scenes
Did you touch anything?
Mitch Taylor Uh, no.
Good. Because all of my filth is arranged in alphabetical order. This, for instance, is under 'H' for 'toy.'
Mitch Taylor What is it?
A penis-stretcher. Wanna try it?
Mitch Taylor No!
I'm kidding. It's yet another in a long series of diversions in an attempt to avoid responsibility.
Kent put his name on his license plate.
Mitch My mother does that to my underwear.
Your mother puts license plates in your underwear? How do you sit?
[In the men's room]
Hi, good morning, I thought I saw you come in here, you must be an earlier riser, we met last night, I'm Jordan, remember? I made you a sweater.
Mitch Last night?
Yeah, it's just something I do with my hands while I'm reading. I hope I got the size right, I'm pretty sure I did, I have a brother so I use him as a sizing comparison, and I have a pretty good eye for that sort of thing, so I just went ahead and made you one because I was, you know, up. Are you peeing?
Mitch Yeah.
I never sleep. I don't know why. It drove my roommate nuts. I mean really nuts, they had to take her away in an ambulance and everything, she's okay now though, but she had to transfer to an easier school but I don't know if that part has anything to do with being my fault, but still, anyway, if you ever want any help studying at night or just let me know, okay, 'cause I'm just a couple of doors down from you guys and I never sleep, okay?
Mitch Thanks, I will.
Are you finished?
Mitch I can't start.
Because I'm here?
Mitch I think so.
Weird. Well I have to go.
Mitch Me too.
Dr. Meredith
A bit of advice.
Mitch [pulls out notebook to write down what Dr. Meredith says]
Oh, uh, thank you?
Dr. Meredith
Always...uh...never...forget to check your references.
Mitch Uh, OK...thank you. I'd better be going.
Dr. Meredith
[Mitch leaves] [to his wife]
I think the young people enjoy it when I "get down" verbally, don't you?
Mitch Taylor Something strange happened to me this morning.
Was it a dream where you see yourself standing in sort of sun-god robes on a pyramid with a thousand naked women screaming and throwing little pickles at you?
Mitch Taylor No.
Why am I the only person that has that dream?
Mitch, will you miss your friends?
Mitch Well, no. I think I intimidate other kids.
Good boy.
Mitch Kent, you know you're not supposed to park that on campus.
You did this, Knight.
I had help.
[Points to Mitch, who waves]
I'm gonna get you guys. Dr. Hathaway's gonna hear all about this. You know, you'll rue the day!
"Rue the day?" Who talks like that?
Mitch Did you know there's a guy living in our closet?
You've seen him too?
Mitch Who is he?
Hollyfeld.
Mitch Why does he keep going into our closet?
Why do you keep going into our closet?
Mitch To get my clothes - but that's not why he goes in there.
Of course not, he's twice your size - your clothes would never fit him.
Mitch Yeah...
Think before you ask these questions, Mitch. Twenty points higher than me? Thinks a big guy like that can wear his clothes?
Mitch This is coherent light.
Mitch's dad Oh, so it talks.
[Chris is holding a lab beaker with pink liquid in it]
Here Mitch taste this for me. Come on, you won't hurt my feelings... What, too sweet?
Mitch No... what is it?
I don't know, I found it in one of the labs.
[Mitch starts to gag and wipe out his mouth]
I'm just kidding. It's yogurt. See? Mmmmm...
Are you going to take me home to meet your parents?
Mitch No, I don't think so.
Why? Are you ashamed of me?
Mitch No, them.
Mrs. Taylor
Dr. Hathaway, I saw your program on radioactive isotopes last night, and I've got a question.
Jerry Hathaway
Yes?
Mrs. Taylor
Is that your real hair?
Jerry Hathaway
Tell me something. Is Mitch by any chance adopted?
Mrs. Taylor
Why, no!
Jerry Hathaway
Amazing.
Mrs. Taylor
Isn't it?
I heard there was going to be someone new this term, are you it?
Mitch Yes.
Do you have a bed?
Mitch Yeah.
Oh, I was going to make you one if you needed it but you don't so that's okay. Well, I'll see you later, probably.
Okay, who is this?
Mitch [As the voice of Jesus]
This is Jesus. And you've been a very naughty boy.
Mitch [As the voice of Jesus]
Hi Kent. Have you been touching yourself?
Yes. I mean, NO!
Mitch [As the voice of Jesus]
...And from now on, stop playing with yourself.
It is God...
If you want to leave, go ahead. But you're going to miss out on all the fun.
Mitch Taylor What fun?
Ick invented a new virus and we're going to release in Kent's room.
