[crammed into a tent with all of the Bellas]

I do not understand camping. We are voluntarily living like dogs.

This is the worst. The air we’re breathing is at least ninety percent fart.

That reminds me, I need to see a man about a horse. [climbs over the others to get out] Um, before I head out, anyone happen to pack a spare roll of toilet paper? Maybe some Subway napkins? Tootsie Roll wrapper? Or a t-shirt size extra small? [no response] Nope. Side of the tent it is. [she leaves]

What are we doing here?

We’re bonding! You seem so tense. Do you need a back rub?

I’m good. Several body parts are rubbing my back right now.

Beca, I know we’re already close but this retreat will let us discover everything about each other.

Is that right?

[moving in closer]

You know, one of my regrets in college is that I didn’t do enough experimenting.

You’re so weird.

I know.