Biker #2 I say we kill him!
BG Biker Gang
[shouts]
Yeah!
Biker #3: I say we hang him, then we kill him!
BG Biker Gang
[shouts]
Yeah!
Biker #4: I say we scalp him!
BG Biker Gang
[shouts]
Yeah!
B4 Biker #4
Then we tattoo him!
BG Biker Gang
[shouts]
Yeah!
B4 Biker #4
Then we hang him!
BG Biker Gang
[shouts]
Yeah!
B4 Biker #4
And then we kill him!
BG Biker Gang
[shouts]
Yeah!
[trying to throw voice without moving lips]
I say we let him go.
BG Biker Gang
[shouts]
No!
Biker Mama [whistles]
I say you let me have him first!
Biker 2 I say we kill him!
B3 Biker 3
I say we hang him, then we kill him!
B4 Biker 4
I say we stomp him!
B4 Biker 4
Then we tattoo him!
B4 Biker 4
Then we hang him!
B4 Biker 4
And then we kill him!
[tries to throw his voice without moving his lips]
I say we let him go!
Biker Mama [whistles and grabs Pee-wee]
I say ya let ME have him first!
[The Biker Gang breaks out in raucous laughter]
Wait! Don't I get a last request?
LB Lead Biker
[turns to his gang, then to Pee-wee]
Why not?
I was wondering if you would go someplace... with me.
Look, Dottie, I like you. Like! I like you!
[shouts]
Dottie! [calm voice] There's a lotta things about me you don't know anything about, Dottie. Things you wouldn't understand. Things you couldn't understand. Things you shouldn't understand.
You don't wanna get mixed up with a guy like me. I'm a loner, Dottie. A rebel.
Francis Buxton Today's my birthday and my father says I can have anything I want.
Good for you and your father.
Francis Buxton So guess what I want.
Francis Buxton No. Your bike!
I want to speak to Francis!
Butler Francis is busy.
Butler Taking his bath.
Oh, REALLY? WHERE ARE THEY HOSING HIM DOWN?!!
[Pee-wee confronts Francis in his large pool-like bath]
STILL wanna ride my bike, Francis?!!
Francis Buxton: No! NO!!! I don't want your crummy old bike!!
AHA! You don't want it anymore BECAUSE YOU ALREADY HAVE IT!!! TELL ME WHERE IT IS BEFORE I LOSE PATIENCE WITH YOU!!!
[Pee-wee enters a noisy biker bar and tries to use the payphone but can't because of the noise]
Shhhhh! I'm trying to use the phone!!
B1 Biker 1
[one of the bikers puts the phone back on the cradle]
Did anybody tell you that this is the private club of the Satan's Helpers?
Nobody hipped me to that, dude.
B1 Biker 1
It's off limits!
Francis Morning, Pee-wee.
Francis Today's my birthday and my father says I can have anything I want.
Good for you and your father.
Francis So guess what I want.
Francis No! Your bike. [Pee-wee laughs on the ground] What's so funny, Pee-wee?
[gets back on his feet]
It's not for sale, Francis!
Francis My father says everything's negotiable, Pee-wee.
I wouldn't sell my bike for all the money in the world. Not for 100 billion-million-TRILLION dollars!
Francis Then you're crazy!
I know you are, but what am I?
Francis You're a nerd!
I know you are, but what am I?
Francis You're an idiot!
I know you are, but what am I?
Pee-wee and Francis I know you are, but what am I?! I know you are, but what am I?! I know you are, but what am I?! I know you are, but what am I?! I know you are, but what am I?!
Francis No. I'm not.
Pee-wee and Francis You are! No way! Knock it off! Cut it out!
Francis Oh, shut up, Pee-wee!
Francis Why don't you make me?
Because I don't make monkeys. I just train 'em!
Francis Oh, Pee-wee, listen to reason! [Pee-wee puts his hand beside his left ear] Come on!
Shh! I'm listening to reason.
Francis Pee-wee!
That's my name, don't wear it out! [takes his bike]
Francis Remember the first time I saw your bike? You were riding past my house, and I came running out to tell you how much I liked it even way back then?
I love that story. [chuckles and leaves with his bike]
Francis [angrily points his finger at his rival]
You'll be sorry, Pee-wee Herman!
KM Kevin Morgan
Well, is everything straightened out?
J Jerry
We are whenever you are.
KM Kevin Morgan
Doesn't it look like I'm ready? [loudly] I am ALWAYS ready! I have BEEN ready since first call! I AM READY! ROLL!
J Jerry
Quiet, please! This is a take. Roll, please.
Thanks for stopping. [rides off] Some night, huh?
Large Marge On this very night, ten years ago, on this same stretch of road, in the dense fog, just like this, I saw the worse accident I ever seen. There was this sound, like a garbage truck dropped off the Empire State Building. [a few seconds later while driving] And when they finally pulled the driver's body from the twisted, burning, WRECK, it looked like...THIS! [makes a hideously deformed face, causing Pee-wee to scream; back to normal] Yes, sir. That was the worst accident I ever seen.
You can drop me off here. [the truck stops before he gets off] Have a nice day! [chuckles]
Large Marge Be sure and tell 'em, Large Marge sent ya! HA HA HA HA HA!
[Pee-wee begins his meeting]
This box contains over 217 bits and pieces of information: Evidence. [extracts some evidence, starting with a photograph] Exhibit A: A photograph of the victims: My bike and me. Exhibit B: [exposes a second photograph] Another photograph. What's missing from this picture? It's just me...WITHOUT MY BIKE! [Amazing Larry is about to whisper to Mario] Is this something you can share with the rest of us, Amazing Larry?! [Larry reacts, then he extracts...] Exhibit C: The horn I was picking up at Chuck's Bike-O-Rama, when my bike was actually stolen. [honks his horn at full blast, and the crowd reacts to it; then he extracts a pen] Exhibit D: Jimmy, what is this?
Chip Uh, looks like a pen.
Exactly! I bought this pen one hour before my bike was stolen. Why? What's the significance?! I DON'T KNOW! [several hours later] Exhibit Q: A scale-model of the entire mall! [points to the scale model with the pointer] X marks the scene of the crime. These arrows here show the exact position of the sun at the hour of the crime. Jupiter was aligned with Pluto! The moon was in the seventh...
Chuck Pee-wee!
Please save your questions until I'm THROUGH, Chuck!
Chuck Well, when will that be? A long time, we wait! We've been here for over three hours now, and I'm not sure if any of us can see what all this is supposed to mean.
"Supposed to mean"? "Supposed to MEAN"?! [snaps the pointer in half, causing Speck to cower under the laundry] I think everyone here knows what this is supposed to mean. When you've gone over something again and again and again and again, like I have. Certain questions get answered. Others spring up! Your mind plays tricks on you. You play tricks back! It's like you're unraveling a big cable-knit sweater that someone keeps knitting and knitting... :[most of the guests leave] ...and knitting and knitting and knitting and knitting and knitting and knitting and knitting!
Pee-wee, let's go up and get some fresh air, alright?
Because it's hot in here.
Hot? Who's hot? Feels just fine to me. I feel just PERFECT! In fact, I can't remember when I felt quite so COZY down here!
Pee-wee, I think I can get Chuck to give you a good break on one of the bikes in the shop.
I don't want some other crappy bike!
Well, Pee-wee, listen, if you want my help...
I DON'T want your help! I don't need the police and I DON'T NEED YOU! I DON'T NEED ANYBODY!
[Pee-wee confronts Francis in his large pool-like bath]
Still wanna buy my bike, Francis?!
Francis What would I do with that old relic? I can have any bike in the world!
AHA! You don't want it anymore, because you already have it! Tell me where it is before I lose patience with you, Francis!
