Also, what is up with your insanely hot brother?
No! You can't have my husband and my brother! That's being very greedy!
I'm not being greedy, you're being greedy.
What?
He's your brother, what are you going to do with him?
The Other Woman quotes
Between the two of us he has the perfect woman, what else would he need?
The one thing we're not giving him: sex.
I can't talk to you until you stop crying.
Then cry on the inside like a winner.
Sorry. I'm usually a fun date. I am.
Phil
I'm having fun.
Yeah?
Phil
Not a lot of it, but some.
You wrecked two marriages!
Lydia
One of them was mine, so that doesn't count.
[after Amber suggests getting a friend to sleep with Mark]
We are not hiring a hooker to sleep with my husband!
She's not a hooker, she's just a slut.
No, we can't keep her. We already have a dog at home.
They should have that for your brain. Like a brain camp. Oh, really, you can go, and you lay on the beach and get tan and drink ginkgo balboa all day and then you come back and you're super smart.
Mark King
It's ginkgo biloba. Balboa was Rocky.
Right. See? See? That's why I need to go to brain camp.
Lydia
Selfish people live longer.
Mark King
I wouldn't even be me without you. I might not always get it right, but I'm right where I want to be.
I swear, every time I look through a set of binoculars, he's got a new mistress.
If we find anymore mistresses I'm going to have to send her to rehab.
We should kick him in the balls!
You slept with him, didn't you? One night and you went right back to being a Stepford.