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Guru Pitka quotes

View Quote In my book, "If you're happy and you know it, Think again", I speak of the teachings of Intimacy, or Into-Me-I-See™. Intimacy is like putting your Wiener on a table and having someone say. 'Hey, That looks like a Penis, Only smaller!' [Laughs] Only Smaller...
View Quote Although I was raised here in India, I was born in America, which is where our journey begins. It's the story of a hockey player, named Darren Roanoke. My most resistant student, who became my greatest teacher... Or some such bullshit, I don't know.
View Quote Dick Pants... send him in.
View Quote Guru Pitka had a farm. EIEIO. And in that farm he did no harm. EIEIO.™
View Quote Milk milk lemonade this is where the fudge is made
View Quote BIBLE - Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth™
View Quote Don't peck my ****ing eyes!
View Quote Break the pickle...tickle, tickle.
View Quote Marishka Hargitay Jessica simpson.
View Quote Marishka Hargitay Val Kilmer.
View Quote Marishka Hargitay... Marishka Hargitay.
View Quote Tonight I want you to go from nowhere to NOW HERE.™
View Quote Is it made out of dog? Is it a dog's tingy, am I being punk'd?
View Quote If you ever sucker punch me again, I'll kick your ass all the way back to the keebler factory.
View Quote I have two tattoos. One of them is DRAMA tattoo and the other is a picture of daffy duck pushing a lawn mower through my pubes.
View Quote Let's make like a baby and head out.
View Quote I don't know what you're talking about. (coughs up feathers)
View Quote Rajneesh, I'd like an alligator soup, and make it snappy. Because alligators are snappy, and at the same time, I want it prompt.
View Quote THE ULTIMATE DISTRACTION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
View Quote Well, it looks more like Gay Skin. (laughs)
View Quote I lied. She is still with Le Coq, and he still has the biggest Weiner in history.
View Quote I WANNA SING!
View Quote Go Speedy. Ride like a cowboy.
View Quote What is it you can't face? (use strong Indian accent on "can't")
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