Jojo Rabbit (2019) · 46 quotes
Let them say whatever they want. People used to say a lot of nasty things about me. "Oh this guy's a lunatic." "Oh, look at that psycho, he's gonna get us all killed. [shrugs, knows he DOES kill people] Let me let you on a little secret: the rabbit is no coward. The humble little bunny faces a dangerous world every day, hunting carrots for his family, for his country.
Adolf Hitler
Yes. Great thinking, Rabbit. we'll use all of these books to make a fake floor that she'll fall through, straight into a pit full of piranhas, and—and lava and... bacon. Why, she won't know what hit her.
Adolf Hitler
I am beginning to question your loyalty to myself and the party. [voice gets louder] You call yourself a patriot?! Yet where is the evidence? The German soldier was born out of necessity. Germany depends on the passion of these young men: passion and the readiness to FALL fot the Fatherland, DESPITE THE FUTILE EFFORTS OF ALLIED WAR PROFITEERS WHO SEND THEIR ILL-PREPARED ARMIES CLUMSILY INTO THE LAIR OF THE WOLF! And only zealous who stand steadfast in the face of the enemy will be ETCHED in German memory forevah! IT IS UP TO YOU TO DECIDE IF YOU WANT TO BE REMEMBERED, or disappear without a trace, like a pitiful grain of sand INTO A DESERT OF INSIGNIFICANCE!
Adolf
Heil me, man.
Jojo
Heil Hitler.
Adolf
Whaat? You can heil me better than that.
Jojo
Heil Hitler.
Adolf
Just throw it away, don't even think about it.
Jojo
Heil Hitler.
Adolf
No you're overthinking it. "Heil Hitler."
Jojo
Heil, Hitterler.
Adolf
Who's Hitterler? Do you even speak German?
Jojo
Heil Hitler!
Adolf
That's not a heil. This is a heil: "Heil!"
Jojo
Heil Hitler!
Adolf
"Heil Hitler!"
Jojo
Heil Hitler!
Adolf
"Heil Hitler!"
Jojo
Heil Hitler! [getting it right] Heil Hitler! Heil Hitler! Heil Hitler! Heil Hitler! Heil Hitler! Heil Hitler! Heil Hitler! Heil Hitler! Heil Hitler! Heil Hitler! Heil Hitler!
Adolf
Ooh, that's it! You've got it! Heil Hitler! Have a great day! Heil Hitler! You can be the best! Heil Hitler! You can do it! Heil Hitler!
Heil Hitler! Heil Hitler! Heil Hitler! Heil Hitler! Heil Hitler! Heil Hitler! Heil Hitler! Heil Hitler! HEILHITLERHEILHITLERHEIHITLERHEILHITLERHEILHITLER HEIL HITLERRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Jojo
HEIL HITLERRRRR!!! WOAHHHHHHHH!!!!!
Adolf
How did she get control like that?
Jojo
She must've used her powers! Mind control.
Adolf
Ah, typical. You see how fast she moves?
Jojo
Yes!
Adolf
Ah, like a female, Jewish Jesse Owens, and now she's got your fancy knife.
Jojo
Mmmph! My knife!
Adolf
Ah, like a female, Jewish Jesse Owens, Jack the Ripper. You're definitely in a pickle, my friend. What to do... what to do...
Got it!
Jojo
I'd negotiate! / Adolf: You're gonna burn the house and blame Winston Churchill. Or negotiate. Hmm.
Adolf
She's pretty rude, you know. That's just my two pfennige. And now she's got TWO KNIVES!
Jojo
I KNOW!
Adolf
How you're gonna chop up stuff?
Jojo
I DON'T KNOW!
Adolf
Oh and she's still up there, that thing, that-- that-- that...
Jojo
Jew!
Adolf
Ah, Jew! Ah, what we're gonna do bout that Jew?
Jojo
You think of something.
Adolf
Oh, now I'm the expert?
Jojo
STOP OFFERING ME DAMN CIGARETTES! I'M TEN!
Adolf
Alright, sorry I'm STRESSED OUT! OK, let's talk like turkeys. You can't let your mother know or that Jew will cut off your Nazi head BUT... there's no reason this thing in the attic needs ruin your life-- in fact... you could use it to your advantage.
Jojo
How?
Adolf
When someone tries to use mind powers on me, you know what I do? Use mind powers back on them. Remember last year, when that one-arm pirate, von Stauffenberg, tried to blow me up with a table bomb?
Jojo
Yeah, you survived.
Adolf
Correctumondo. But the only reason I survived, apart from having bomb-proof legs, is that I outwitted old-von Stauffy. I let him think I was dead when in actual, I was absolutely fine. But pretending I was dead, I drew out all the traitors. So what you're going to do?
Jojo
Pretend I'm dead?
Adolf
Exactly-- no. No, what I mean is this: make her feel safe and then she'll drop her guard and then YOU will be the one in control.
Jojo
Reverse psychology!
Adolf
Don't complicate things. Just use my backwards mind power trick, and everything will be fine. [sees watch] Oh, I have to go. We're having unicorn for dinner at my place tonight. Concentrate, Jojo! Remember, a Jew living in your wall is better than two Jews flying around with their bat wings climbing down chimneys and eating innocent Nazis. And don't give her any more knives! Tschüss! [proceeds to jump out of the window]
