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The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey

The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey quotes

53 total quotes

Balin
Bilbo Baggins
Gandalf the Grey
Gollum / Sméagol
Radagast The Brown
Thorin Oakenshield




View Quote Great Goblin: What are you doing in these parts?
[the dwarves remain silent]
Oin: Don't worry, lads. I'll handle this.
Great Goblin: No tricks! I want the truth! Warts and all.
Oin: You're going to have to speak up. Your boys have flattened my trumpet.
Great Goblin [angry, heading towards them] I'll flatten more than your trumpet!
Bofur: [steps forward] It's more information you want, I'm the one you should speak to! [Great Goblin looks at Bofur] We were on the road. Well, it's not so much of a road as path. Actually, it's not even that come to think of it- it's more like a track. Anyway, the point is we were on this road, like a path, like a track, and then we weren't. Which is a problem, because we were supposed to be in Dunland last Tuesday.
Dori: Visiting distant relations.
Bofur: Some inbreds on me mother's side.
Great Goblin: [enraged] Shut UP!!! If they will not talk, we'll make them squawk! Bring out the Mangler! Bring out the Bone-Breaker! [points at Ori] Start with the youngest!
Thorin: WAIT! [steps forward]
Great Goblin: Well, well, well! Look who it is. Thorin, son of Thráin, son of Thrór! King Under the Mountain. [bows mockingly] Oh! But I'm forgetting, you don't have a mountain, and you're not a king. Which makes you... nobody, really. I know someone who will pay a pretty price for your head. Just a head, nothing attached. Perhaps you know of whom I speak. An old enemy of yours. A Pale Orc astride a White Warg.
Thorin: Azog the Defiler was destroyed. He was slain in battle long ago!
Great Goblin: So you think his defiling days are done, do you? [chuckles, then turns to his scribe] Send word to the Pale Orc. Tell him I have found his prize.
View Quote Great Goblin: Who would be so bold as to come armed into my kingdom? Spies? Thieves? Assassins?!
Grinnah: Dwarves, your Malevolence.
Great Goblin: Dwarves?
Grinnah: We found them on the front porch.
Great Goblin: Well, don't just stand there, search them! Every crack, every crevice!
[the Goblins search the dwarves, including squashing Oin's ear trumpet]
View Quote Master Worrywort: You! Mr. Bilbo, where're you off to?
Bilbo: Can't stop! I'm already late.
Master Worrywort: Late for what?
Bilbo: [excited] I'm going on an adventure!
View Quote Radagast the Brown: The Greenwood is sick, Gandalf. A darkness has fallen over it. Nothing grows any more, at least nothing good. The air is foul with decay. The worst are the webs.
Gandalf: Webs? What do you mean?
Radagast: Spiders, Gandalf. Giant ones. Some kind of spawn of Ungoliant or I'm not a wizard. I followed their trail, they came from... Dol Guldur.
Gandalf: Dol Guldur? But the old fortress is abandoned.
Radagast: No, Gandalf, 'tis not. A dark power dwells in there. Such as I have never felt before. It is the shadow of an ancient horror. One that can summon the spirits of the dead. I saw him, Gandalf. From out of the darkness, a Necromancer has come.
View Quote Saruman: Tell me, Gandalf, did you think these plans and schemes of yours would go unnoticed?
Gandalf: Unnoticed? No, I... I'm simply doing what I feel to be right.
Galadriel: The dragon has long been on your mind.
Gandalf: This is true, my lady. Smaug owes allegiance to no one, but if he should side with the Enemy... A dragon could be used to terrible effect.
Saruman: What enemy? Gandalf, the Enemy is defeated. Sauron is vanquished. He can never regain his full strength.
[extended scene]
Gandalf: Does it not worry you that the last of the Dwarf-rings should simply vanish along with its bearer? Of the Seven Dwarf-rings, four were consumed by dragons, two were taken by Sauron before he fell in Mordor. The fate of the last Dwarf-ring remains unknown. The ring that was borne by Thrain.
Saruman: Without the Ruling Ring of Power, the Seven are no value to the Enemy. To control the other Rings, he needs the One. And that Ring was lost long, long ago. It was swept out to sea by the waters of the Anduin.
Elrond: Gandalf. For four-hundred years, we have lived in peace, a hard-won, Watchful Peace.
Gandalf: Are we- are we at peace? Trolls have come down from the mountains, they are raiding villages, destroying farms. Orcs have attacked us on the road!
Elrond: Hardly a prelude to war.
Saruman: Always you must meddle, looking for trouble when none exists.
Galadriel: Let him speak.
Gandalf: There is something at work beyond the evil of Smaug. Something far more powerful. We could remain blind to it but it will not be ignoring us, that I can promise you. A sickness lies over the Greenwood. The Woodsmen who live there now call it Mirkwood and, uh, they say...
Saruman: Well, don't stop now. Tell us what the Woodsmen say.
Gandalf: They speak of a Necromancer living in Dol Guldur, a sorcerer who could summon the dead.
Saruman: That's absurd. No such power exists in this world. This "Necromancer" is nothing more than a mortal man. A conjurer dabbling in black magic.
Gandalf: And so I thought too, but Radagast had seen...
Saruman: Radagast? Do not speak to me of Radagast the Brown. He is a foolish fellow.
Gandalf: Well, he's odd, I'll grant you. He lives a solitary life...
Saruman: It's not that. It's his excessive consumption of mushrooms! They've addled his brain and yellowed his teeth!
View Quote [after narrowly escaping Azog, Gandalf revives Thorin. He awakens, and panics; his last recollection before losing consciousness was of Bilbo lunging at an orc that was about to behead him]
Thorin: The halfling!
Gandalf: It's all right. Bilbo is here. He's quite safe.
Thorin: [gets to his feet and rounds on Bilbo] You! What were you doing?! You nearly got yourself killed! [advances on him] Did I not say you would be a burden?! That you would not survive in the wild?! And you had no place amongst us?! [embraces Bilbo] I have never been so wrong in all my life! I am sorry I doubted you.
Bilbo: I would have doubted me too. I'm not a hero, or a warrior, or even a burglar. [They watch the eagles fly off.]
View Quote [Bilbo regains consciousness and sees Gollum dragging and attacking a goblin that he fought. In the process, Gollum dropped a golden Ring. As Gollum drags the goblin away, Bilbo gets up, goes to the Ring, picks it up, and puts it in his pocket. He sees Gollum eating the goblin. Bilbo hides behind a rock, his sword's light dims out. Gollum quietly rides his boat across the river and pops out from over the rock, Bilbo is hiding and jumps in front of Bilbo]
Gollum: Bless us and splash us, precious! That's a meaty mouthful! [Bilbo points his sword at Gollum's throat, Gollum notices the blade] Gollum! Gollum!
Bilbo: Back! Stay back. I'm... warning you. Don't come any closer.
Sméagol: It's got an elfish blade.
Gollum: But it's not a elfs.
Sméagol: Not an elfs, no. What is it, precious? What is it?
Bilbo: My name is... Bilbo Baggins.
Sméagol: [confused] Bagginses? What is a Bagginses, precious?
Bilbo: I'm a hobbit from the Shire.
Sméagol: Oh! [laughs a little] We like goblinses, batses, and fishes, but we hasn't tried hobbitses before!
Gollum: Is it soft? Is it juicy?
Bilbo: [swings his sword] Now... Now, keep... keep... keep your distance! I'll use this if I have to! [Gollum screams] I don't want any trouble! Do you understand!? Just show me the way to get out of here and I'll be on my way!
Gollum: Why? Is it lost?
Bilbo: Yes. Yes, and I want to get un-lost as soon as possible.
Sméagol: Oh! We knows! We knows safe paths for hobbitses! Safe paths in the dark-
Gollum: Shut up!
Bilbo: I didn't say anything.
Gollum: Wasn't talking to you!
Sméagol: Well, yes, we was, precious. We was.
Bilbo: I-I don’t know what your game is, but I...
Sméagol: [ecstatic] GAMES?! Oh, we loves games! Doesn't we, precious? Does it like games? Does it, does it, does it like to play?
Bilbo: Maybe.
Sméagol: What has roots as nobody sees, Is taller than trees. Up, up, up it goes, And yet never grows?
Bilbo: [thinks] The mountain.
Sméagol: Yes! Yes! Oh, let's have another one, huh? Yes, yeah, go, do it again! Do it, do it again! Ask us!
Gollum: No! No more riddles! Finish him off! Finish him now! Gollum! Gollum!
Bilbo: No, no, no, no. I-I want to play. I do. I want to play. I can see you are very good at this. So, why don't we have a game of riddles? Yes, just-just-just you and me.
Sméagol: Yes. Just-just-just us.
Bilbo: Yes. Yes! And if I win, you show me the way out, yes?
Sméagol: Yes, yes!
Gollum: And if it loses, what then?
Sméagol: Well, if it loses, precious, then we eats it! [to Bilbo] If Baggins loses, we eats it whole.
Bilbo: [Long pause] Fair enough. [puts his sword away, Gollum looks at the sword, then Sméagol looks up at him innocently.]
Sméagol: But Baggins first.
Bilbo: [thinks for a moment] Thirty white horses on a red hill. / First they champ, then they stamp, / Then they stand still.
[Pause, Sméagol thinks for a long moment]
Sméagol: Teef? [Teeth] [Bilbo has a look of defeat] TEEF! [Laughs] Oh, yes, my precious! But we... we only have...
Gollum: Nine. [Shows his teeth, Bilbo shows a disgusted look] Our turn. Voiceless it cries / Wingless flutters / Toothless bites / Mouthless mutters.
Bilbo Baggins: Just a minute.
Sméagol: Oh! Ooh! We knows! We knows!
Gollum: Shut up!
[Bilbo looks at the pond in the cave]
Bilbo: Wind. It's wind! Of course it is.
Gollum: [snarls] Very clever, hobbitses. Very clever...!
Bilbo: [pulls out his sword to prevent Gollum from attacking him] A-a-a-a-a-a box without hinges, key, or-or lid / Yet golden treasure inside is hid.
Sméagol: Um... No, uh... Box. Uh, uh, uh, um... Box, a lid and a key...
Bilbo: Well?
Gollum: It's nasty.
Sméagol: Box... Key, lid, and...
Bilbo: Do you give up?
Sméagol: Give us a chance, precious! Give us a chance! [strains his memory] EGGSES! Eggses! Wet, crunchy little eggses, yes! Grandmother taught us to suck them, yes! Yes!
Gollum: We have one for you. All things it devours, birds, beasts, trees, flowers. Gnaws iron, bites steel, grinds hard stones to meal. Answer us.
Bilbo: [nervously] Give me a moment, please! I gave you a good long while. [muttering to himself] Birds, beasts... Beasts? Trees, flowers... [out loud] I don't know this one.
Gollum: Is it...tasty? [singsong voice] ♪Is it scruuuuumptiooooooooouuuuuuus??♪ [grabs Bilbo from behind] Is it crunchable?!
Bilbo: [jumps back and points his sword] Let me think! Let me think!
[Tries to think of the answer, but is stumped. Gollum grins.]
Gollum: It's stuck. Bagginses is stuck... [pause] Time's up. [starts to crawl down]
Bilbo: [realizing] Time. Time... [louder] The answer...is time. [Gollum groans in frustration] Ahem. Actually, it wasn't that hard.
Gollum: Last question. Last chance. [picks up a rock]
'Bilbo': Okay... [thinks]
Gollum: Ask us. [pause] ASK US!!
Bilbo: Yes, yes. All right. [he thinks, putting his hand in his pocket, he speaks to himself] What have I got in my pocket?
Gollum: [believing Bilbo asked him a riddle] That's... That's not fair. It's not fair! That's against the rules! [throws the rock down upset] Now ask us another one!
Bilbo: [realizing] No. No, no, no. You said ask me a question. Well, that is my question. What have I got in my pocket?
Gollum: Three guesses, precious. It must give us three. [holds up only two fingers]
Bilbo: Three guesses. Very well. Guess away.
Sméagol: Handses!
Bilbo: [shows Gollum his hand] Wrong. Guess again.
Sméagol: [searching through bones sitting by him] Fishbones, goblins' teeth, wet shells... Bat wings... Oh... [paws the ground, groaning in frustration] KNIFE!!!
Gollum: Oh, shut up!
Bilbo: Wrong again. Last guess.
Sméagol: String!
Gollum: Or nothing.
Bilbo: Two guesses at once. Wrong both times. [Gollum tips over, falls, and starts crying] So... come then. I won the game; you promised to show me the way out.
Gollum: Did we say so, precious? Did we say so? [looks at Bilbo suspiciously] What has it got in its pocketses?
Bilbo: That's no concern of yours. You lost.
Gollum: "Lost"? "Lost"? "Lost"?! [reaches into his pocket for the Ring, but panics to find it missing]
Sméagol: Where is it? Where is it?! No! Where is it?! NOOOOO!!!!! No! Lost! Curse us and splash us, my precious is lost!
Bilbo: [quickly takes the ring out of his pocket and hides it behind his back] What have you lost?
Sméagol: Mustn't ask us! Not its business! NO!!! Gollum! Gollum! [cries for a moment, Bilbo starts to feel pity for him, Gollum looks at his reflection in the water and his sadness slowly turns to anger]
Gollum: What has it got in his nasty... little... pocketses?
[Bilbo holds the ring behind his back and points his sword at Gollum, who realizes that Bilbo has the ring]
Gollum: He stole it. He stole it! AHHHH!!! HE STOLE IT!!!!! [throws a rock at Bilbo, who reflects it with his sword and runs off with Gollum on his tail]
View Quote [Bilbo sees Bombur walk from the pantry holding several cheese wheels]
Bilbo: A tad excessive, isn't it? Have you got a cheese knife?
Bofur: "Cheese knife?" He eats it by the block.
View Quote [Dialogue for this scene in Black Speech. At Weathertop, a band of Orcs arrive to report to their leader]
Yazneg: The Dwarves, Master, we lost them. Ambushed by Elven filth, we were-
Azog: [furious] I don't want excuses! I want the head of the Dwarf King!
Yazneg: We were outnumbered, there was nothing we could do. I barely escaped with my life!
Azog: [seizes Yazneg by the throat] Far better you had paid with it! [Azog throws Yazneg aside to be torn apart by Wargs]
View Quote [extended scene]
Gandalf: Of course I was going to tell you, I was waiting for this very chance. And really, I think you could trust that I know what I am doing.
Elrond: Do you? That dragon has slept for sixty years. What will happen if your plan should fail? If you wake that beast?
Gandalf: But if we succeed... If the Dwarves take back the mountain, our defences in the East will be strengthened.
Elrond: It is a dangerous move, Gandalf.
Gandalf: It is also dangerous to do nothing or cut the throne of Erebor, it's Thorin's birthright. What is it you fear?
Elrond: Have you forgotten? A strain of madness runs deep in that family. His grandfather lost his mind, his father suc****bed to the same sickness. Can you swear Thorin Oakenshield will not also fall? Gandalf, these decisions do not rest with us alone. It is not up to you or me to redraw the map of Middle-earth.
View Quote [Gandalf and the dwarfs are making their escape through the goblin tunnels but they are stopped by the Great Goblin and surrounded by goblins as well]
Great Goblin: You thought you could escape me! [swings his club at Gandalf that pushes him back] What are you gonna do now, wizard?
[Gandalf pokes the Great Goblin's eye with his staff. Gandalf uses Glamdring to slice the Great Goblin's belly. He falls to his knees and looks at Gandalf]
Great Goblin: That'll do it.
[Gandalf uses Glamdring to split the Great Goblin's throat. He dies and falls on the bridge. The bridge breaks underneath and the dwarfs and Gandalf fall down deep in the cavern below, they all survived as they landed safely on the ground]
Bofur: Well, that could have been worse. [the dead body of the Great Goblin lands on top of them]
Dwalin: You've got to be joking!
View Quote [in the troll hoard, Gandalf steps on a small Elf-made sword; he goes out of the cave and walks up to Bilbo]
Gandalf: Bilbo.
Bilbo: Hmm?
Gandalf: Here. [gives Bilbo the sword] This is about your size.
Bilbo: I can't take this.
Gandalf: The blade is of Elvish-make, which means it will glow blue when orcs or goblins are nearby.
Bilbo: I have... I have never used a sword in my life.
Gandalf: And I hope you never have to. But if you do, remember this: true courage lies in knowing not when to take a life, but when to spare one.
View Quote [The doorbell rings; Bilbo goes to answer it and finds a dwarf.]
Dwalin: [Bows] Dwalin, at your service.
Bilbo: Uh, Bilbo...Baggins. At yours. [Dwalin walks in] Do we know each other?
Dwalin: No. Which way, laddie? Is it down here?
Bilbo: Is what down where?
Dwalin: Supper. He said there'd be food and lots of it.
Bilbo: He said? Who said?
[Dwalin proceeds to the kitchen and eats Bilbo's dinner]
Dwalin: Very good, this. Any more?
Bilbo: What? Oh, uh, yes, yes. [finds a jar of seed-cakes] Help yourself. [pauses as Dwalin eats away] It's just that, um, I wasn't expecting company.
[The doorbell rings]
Dwalin: That'll be the door.
[Bilbo opens the door, the dwarf smiles and bows]
Balin: Balin, At your service.
Bilbo: [blankly] Good evening.
Balin: Yes, it is. Though I think it might rain later. Am I late?
Bilbo: Late for what?
Balin: [catches Dwalin trying to get more scones out of another jar] OH! Evening, brother!
Dwalin: [sets down the jar and smiles] Ho ho, by my beard! You are shorter and wider than last we met.
Balin: Wider, not shorter. Sharp enough for both of us.
[Dwalin and Balin laugh and butt heads. They proceed to raid Bilbo's pantry while talking with each other]
Bilbo: Excuse me? Sorry, I hate to interrupt, but the thing is I'm not entirely sure you're in the right house. It's not that I don't like visitors. I-I like visitors as much as the next hobbit, but I do like to know them before they come visiting. The thing is...uh...the thing is, I don't know either of you, not in the slightest. I don't mean to be blunt, but I had to speak my mind. I'm sorry.
Balin: [suddenly noticing that Bilbo was talking] Apology accepted. [smiles, to Bilbo's growing confusion]
View Quote [the goblins empty a sack of objects from Rivendell, stolen by Nori]
Grinnah: It is my belief, your great protuberance, that they are in league with Elves!
Great Goblin: [looks at the bottom of a golden candelabra] "Made in Rivendell". Bah! Second Age, couldn't give it away. [tosses it aside]
[Dori looks at Nori, who has a guilty expression on his face]
Nori: Just a couple of keepsakes.
View Quote [Thorin and Balin see Bilbo walk off after his discussion with Gandalf]
Balin: It appears we have lost our burglar. Probably for the best. The odds were always against us. After all, what are we? Merchants, miners, tinkers, toy makers. Hardly the stuff of legend.
Thorin: There are a few warriors amongst us.
Balin: Old warriors.
Thorin: I would take each and every one of these dwarves over an army from the Iron Hills, for when I called upon them, they answered. Loyalty, honor, a willing heart. I can ask no more than that.
Balin: You don't have to do this. You have a choice. You've done honorably by our people. You have built a new life for us in the Blue Mountains. A life of peace and plenty. A life that is worth more than all the gold in Erebor.
Thorin: [holds the key out] From the grandfather to my father, this has come to me. They dreamt of the day when the dwarves of Erebor would reclaim their homeland. There is no choice, Balin. Not for me.
Balin: Then we are with you, laddie. We will see it done.