Phoebe quotes from Ghostbusters: Afterlife (2021)

Phoebe

Are you sure this is safe?

Safe? Heh. No. No, history is safe. Geometry: that's safe. Science is all particle accelerators and hydrogen bombs. Science is giving yourself the plague and gambling on the cure.

Phoebe

Science is reckless.

Totally! Yes! It's punk rock! A safety pin through the nipple of academia.

Ouch.

Fire it up.

Ray Stantz

Ray's Occult, and we're closed.

Phoebe

Wait! I only get one phone call. I'm... in prison.

Ray

The slammer, huh? Heh, been there myself. I'm no lawyer, but I'm listening.

Phoebe

Are you Ray Stanz, the Ghostbuster?

Ray

And now, I'm hanging up.

Phoebe

Hang on, please! I'm calling about Egon Spengler.

Ray

Egon Spengler can rot in Hell.

Phoebe

He died last week.

Ray

Oh, man... No kidding.

Phoebe

Weren't you two friends?

Ray

That was a long time ago.

Phoebe

What happened to you guys?

Ray

Well, when we started, busting ghosts was a gas. The economy was good. Reagan years. People believed in us, then things got slow. Hauntings got thin. Venkman thought we did our job too well. Oh, we could barely keep up our mortgage. Some actor bought up most of Tribeca, and we lost the firehouse. It's a Starbucks now.

Phoebe

So, then you all just walked away?

Ray

Peter went back to academia. He's in SUNY Cortland now, he's a Professor Emeritus, he teaches advertising and promotion. Winston went into finance, he worked hard, coined a fortune. And I'm... here.

Phoebe

Well... what about Egon?

Ray

Well, he wasn't helping. We went from ten calls a week, to one, if we were lucky. Then Egon started to tell people their little ghost problems didn't matter because the world was coming to an end. He got spooky, freaked me out! One morning, I go to work, and Ecto-1, our old Cadillac, is gone. His neutronophone and collider pack, all the traps! Sixteen ounces of fuel isotope! All gone! He cleaned us out! Now we were the dead ones.

Phoebe

Don't you think he might have had a reason?

Ray

He phoned me, about ten years later. Some small town in Oklahoma. Kept rambling on about the rising storm. A huge psychic tornado that was going to consume humanity in darkness forever. And, kid, I wanted to believe him-

Phoebe

You don't understand, there was this mountain, and it had these ancient carvings, and-

Ray

Kid, kid, kid, there are a lot of mountains out there with ancient carvings. Take a little advice: don't go chasing ghosts.

Phoebe

Egon Spengler was my grandfather.

Time's up.

Ray

Hello?

Phoebe

Uh... what do you call a fish with no 'i's? A fsh! Uh... A whale... There's two whales in a bar, and one of them goes [imitates whale call], and then, the other one goes: 'go home. You're drunk.' Uh... Uh... so a grasshopper walks into a bar, and the bartender's like 'we have a drink named after you!' And the grasshopper goes 'you have a drink named Steve?!'

Have you come to offer yourself in sacrifice?

Phoebe

What?

Are you prepared to die?

Phoebe

No, I'm twelve. Are you?

Peter

Hi, there. Pete Venkman, from the home office. Thanks for pitching in.

Phoebe

You're welcome.

Peter

I like your style. Who's that one?

Callie. [pauses] Callie Spengler.

Peter

Spengler? Heh, weird name. Try to make the best of that. Alright, we're gonna have cocoa inside. Some of us will have rum with it.