Four Christmases (2008) quotes

View Quote Connor: Do you know who I am?
Brad: What?
Connor: Google me, bitch! I might be famous one day.

View Quote Darryl: Look, Brad. I'm not trying to be your father, you already got one of those. I'm just hoping for a chance to be your friend.
Brad: You were my friend, Darryl. You were my best friend. We grew up together, we rode bikes together, we used to smell each other's hands. But now you're sleeping with my mom and it's a little bit weird for me. Can you appreciate that?
Darryl: I never had a sexual thought about your mom until I was 30.
Brad: Can you leave it alone? You can't be my friend anymore. You can't be sleeping with my mom and still be my friend, ok?

View Quote Kate: Joe wasn't gay,
Brad: OK, haircuts don't lie.

View Quote Susan: Could you hold her for a sec? I need to make another layer.
Kate: Actually, I-- [Baby Clementine begins to cry] Okay.

View Quote [as Joseph in the Nativity play] My wife is pregnant and it's not my baby, but yet I'm cool with it, because God's the one who got her pregnant.

View Quote Boys, I don't want to speak ill of your mother on Christmas, but she's nothing but a common street whore.

View Quote My childhood was like The Shawshank Redemption, except I didn't have some old, warm, black man to share my story with!

View Quote Woman! Do your job and swaddle this baby!

View Quote You really can't spell 'families' without lies. Try it.