Bart
Excuse me while I whip this out...
[People cringe back and a woman screams - he pulls out a letter - people sigh, almost sounding disappointed] Bart (continuing): By the power invested in me by the honorable William J. Le Petomane--
[People start cocking guns and pointing them at Bart] Bart (continuing): I hereby assume the duties of sheriff in and for the township of Rockridge.
Reverend
Gentlemen, gentlemen, let's not let anger rule the day! (waving Bible) As your spiritual leader, I implore you to pay heed to this good book and what it has to saaaayyy!
Reverend
[A hole is shot through the Bible; the Reverend turns to Bart]
Son, you're on your own. (exit Reverend)
